Am I liable for my mothers debt???

GalDriver

Oops......now I can't even work a PC! As I was saying......I am living proof that we NEVER stop learning and that those lessons can still be pretty painful even at this age. Up until recent years I was a young 40-something who didn't suffer fools gladly as the saying goes, right now I feel more like an ancient 'pushing 50 going on 90' who's fumbled the reins and is struggling for control of her life back!!! I will get there, I'm a resilient soul (for all this waffle!) Your support and advice has helped, thank you ladies and gentlemen, you are all stars :-) xx

egamar

Pushing 50? You're but a child! No wonder you need a hug now and then!

Good luck!

Dylanwing

GalDriver - Some good advice on here, and good luck. Funny how these Companies are happy to discuss an account with a third party when they are chasing a debt!

GalDriver

Hallo you lovely lot! I got the advice I needed. NO I'M NOT LIABLE. Yes, I know that's what you all said but I needed to hear it from a legal eagle. Also they confirmed that I did the pro-rata offers correctly including the division of capital left from the house sale. Mum and I have got an appointment with the CAB next week where I shall pass over all the correspondence and let them take over. Barclaycard have asked for a review of her current £1 pcm payments and said they will only deal with a 'nationally recognised financial institution' such as CAB etc so they've given me the final shove to do what I should have done, perhaps, in the first place.....to back off! It's been emotionally and even physically draining trying to deal with it along with a mother who's head is firmly in the sand whilst doing my full time job as well. If that job was an office one I may have been able to deal with some of it at work but as I drive a train for a living that would be a tad difficult! The legal advisor also said I should consider contacting the ombudsman about irresponsible lending too (egamar....you're ahead of your time ;-) ).Thanks again, your support was invaluable while I awaited legal advice. I think I can see my life coming back from over the horizon............HOORAH!

jonnyb

Galdriver, a few observations.

1. if you had a joint mortgage then you will have been financially associated on your credit file, which means any bad credit against your mother will also show against you. If you no longer have any joint finances, I would check your credit files with all 3 credit ref agencies and apply to be disassociated from your mother.

2. redimp98 suggested bankruptcy; if your mother is not likely to need credit in the future - something you will have to decide - I think it sounds like a tempting way out of the situation.

3. don't worry too much about any stimga surrounding your mother's debts. Like you said, it was the card companies themselves who were foolish enough to grant the credit in the first place.

Good luck.

GalDriver

Thanks jonnyb, I have an Equifax account so check my rating regularly. I found out about mum's debts when I was refused a re-mortgage. When I asked why I was told that the credit rating of "the property" was bad. It took her 3 times of telling me with a 'knowing' look before the penny dropped and I realised she meant SOMEONE else in the property....i.e. my mum. I then re-checked my Equifax report that I'd had a year earlier only to find that she had a stack of credit cards (17) with a total debt of £30,000! I, foolishly, had skimmed over her info when I'd checked the report thinking they were mail order catalogues etc (I saw the name Littlewoods....didn't realise they do credit cards too!) You can imagine, I'm sure, the strain this has put on our relationship but I still try to protect her.

I think bankruptcy would be the best option too as she doesn't need credit (she has a rented flat which is secure for as long as she wants it as it's owned by a cousin who bought it as an investment).

Personally I would complain to the ombudsman and get the local MP and press involved to shame the credit card companies but she is worried about what her neighbours etc would say/think...I reckon if she went public though she'd find more people that she'd imagine who a)sympathise and b) also have debts.

My partner and I intend to buy a house together next year so I'm really hoping this doesn't have a knock on affect on my credit rating as we'll be needing a mortgage. What are the other 2 credit reference agencies I should be checking jonnyb?

egamar

By the way, GalDriver, it may just be me, but your last post reads as so much more composed and in control than the earlier ones. I reckon you might be feeling a bit bit better!

GalDriver

egamar you are so right! I feel much more in control again. We have an appointment with CAB next Wednesday and I am now happily admitting defeat and passing it all over to them. My legal advisor reassured me that I am not only NOT LIABLE but that I made the right pro-rata calculations, I took on board your (and my partners) comments about dealing with snakes and I've enjoyed writing to them all stating our position and, basically, washing my hands of it whilst politely threatening to report them to the ombudsman for irresponsible lending. My mum has also responded well to my regained confidence and stopped laying a guilt-trip at my door to make herself feel a little better. I've never rebuked her for getting herself into this position and always tried to protect her from the snakes and any local scandal, as she has wished, but now she sees that what will be will be and that we've gone as far down that road as possible. She tends to stick her head firmly in the sand (not an age thing, she's always been like it) but even she has noticed lately that I've come to the end of my tether. Thank you for your kind words and support :-)

egamar

Good News!
:beer:

jonnyb

the other credit ref agencies are
experian - I work for them - you can get address info from www.experian.co.uk under the consumer advice section.

callcredit - www.callcredit.co.uk