Am I liable for my mothers debt???

GalDriver

HELP! I've been trying to sort out my mother's credit card debt for about a year now. I finally got to the point of offering a percentage settlement to them all (17 of them!) which didn't amount to much each particularly the lesser ones. They are refusing the offer and suggesting she keeps up the £1 per month each that the CAB set up for her. One of the lesser ones phoned me this evening, I'm authorised (.....for authorised read lumbered!) to deal with them, saying that they will accept the £1 per month until she dies then I will be liable for her debt! My mum's 78 so I suppose they think it's worth the wait. When I asked them why I would be liable and expressed my surprise that I would be he back-tracked a little and said he didn't know and that he was just passing on what he had been told to say by the credit card company. It didn't ring true but certainly worried me enough to come here to ask if anyone knows if it COULD be true. I'm hoping they're just trying it on, as they did when I first started sorting her debt (they asked me if I could pay it off for her which I can't afford to do). It's been a traumatic enough rollercoaster since I discovered her debt and I could do without this extra worry hanging over my head too. Any advice very gratefully received please.

GalDriver

Thank you Al Mac, there may be a complication though as we sold a house that was in both our names in March this year. It's a long story but, briefly, I couldn't afford to keep the house on (I've paid the mortgage since 1986 apart from the last 5 years of her contributing what the local council allocated her, that was less than half the interest). I tried to remortgage which is when I found out about her debts. As advised by a solicitor I calculated the percentage of our contributions to allocate what we'd each get from the proceeds (total £17,000). Even if she had 50% of it it would not have got even close to paying off her £30,000 indebtedness tot he credit card companies. Does the fact that we/she's sold property make a difference? can they claim something from me if she dies within a certain time after the sale? I thought my calculations were actually generous to them as I didn't deduct her moving costs etc which I paid for. I'm hoping to get a mortgage again sometime and would be really nervous to if I thought they could come knocking on my door to pay her debt.

redimp98

Credit card co accepts £1 pm, and at the same time will be charging 20%+ on the outstanding amount. So on £30k, the charge is £500 pm -£1.

You personally have no responsibility for paying someone else's debt. That payment can only come out of that person's assets. However I dont think she can simply wilfully dispose of any assets in her own name and then claim she has no money with which to pay. She could declare herself bankrupt.
Get advice from a solicitor.

CLAPTON

How much was her share of the house sale?
and what has she done with the money?

what is the source of her income?

In any event as others have already said when she dies they can't chase you to pay her debts. They can only claim on the estate and even that is after funeral costs etc are deducted.

egamar

No, you are NOT liable.

Name and shame the credit card company. If that happened recently they should still have a tape of the call. Complain at the highest level and to the appropriate regulatory body (I'm sure someone will tell you to whom and how best to complain). Someone should be sacked, and someone else subject to internal disciplinary procures and the whole sorry outfit exposed to public opprobrium.

Don't get enmeshed in who sold what to whom for how much and why. Your mum's debt is hers and hers alone. Be careful that you don't somehow get dragged into more responsibility by these scurrilous blackguards: you are simply acting on your mum's behalf, you have no responsibility whatsoever.

Grrrr - some companies are despicable.

Sorry for your troubles

egamar

Ooops - deleted a duplicate. Sorry.

egamar

Al_Mac wrote: »

egamar, the company did wrong, they all do, individuals not understanding law is common, even on here.

But what they did wasn't accidental, was done deliberately to pressurise the OP was clearly harassment and should be punished (if the OP has the energy)

Al_Mac wrote: »

However the sale of the house and what happened to the money, is the important bit. There are laws about it.

Important to the mother and the OP's role on behalf of her mother, perhaps (but if the money has gone, it's gone).

What I was referring to was the OP's own responsibilities here, and she has none (and did take legal advice at the time). If the OP and her mother owned the house jointly, then splitting the proceeds 50/50 is fine and creates no extension of liability on the OP for her mother's debts. The OP says that the 50/50 split was generous to the mother, and it probably was, especially if (as might be the case) the OP was probably paying the lion's share of mortgage and other expenses during recent years.

I think the OP needs reassurance and bolstering here against an abusive creditor (who had the temerity to ask the OP if she would pay off her mother's debt! These people have no shame!) rather than confusing with issues about what happened with the proceeds of the sale of their house.

The creditors have a relationship only with the mother, not the OP. If they come after the mother I imagine a) she'll qualify for legal aid and b) some extremely damaging publicity about harassing a poverty-stricken 78- year-old would soon halt that case.

It seems the OP is worried about doing the "honourable" thing by dishonourable creditors. She's probably of my generation, but I leave those scruples behind the moment I detect a company playing beyond what is fair. This case presses all my buttons about the abuse of power in (commercial) relationships.

GalDriver

Thank you egamar for your kind supportive words, and you're right about the energy....I have none left. This has been and still is an emotional rollercoaster that I could have dealt with better had mum told me before it got to this stage. I discovered because I was already struggling with the mortgage and secured loans that were taken out to maintain the old house (the whole story is a very long one and covers family problems going back to the 80s so I won't bore you here. I think they are actually irrelevant anyway). As Al Mac rightly asked what happened to the proceeds of the house. There was approx £17,000 left. The pro-rata calculations left her with just £1,236.08 (7.2%) which was then divided pro-rata and offered as lump sums to each credit card company ranging from about a tenner up to £300 depending on her debt to them. The money I personally got from the sale went towards my own credit card debts. I was prepared for them to try to fight for 50% of the proceeds even though she has never paid a penny of her own money towards the mortgage. What was paid on her behalf was from the local council, only for the last 5 years (since I divorced and took on the payments alone), as she is on basic pension and pension credit only, that's what I used in the calculations. If they did that then they would be offered a little more. They didn't query that, just refused and asked that the £1 per month (arranged by CAB over a year ago) continue until 'they review it'. We wanted to get this over and done with as it has, obviously, caused much strain and stress within the family. I am trying to maintain some sort of outward pride for my mum. I too said we should take it to the local MP, papers etc and embarass the hell out of companies who ALLOW a septaugenarian to acqure 17 credit cards and use them all to the limit when only in receipt of basic state pension etc but she doesn't want the fuss. I know she did wrong, that's another issue for us as a family to deal with, but they certainly did wrong too. This finance company (Cabot on behalf of Monument) that told me I would be liable for her debt after her death are the one who've scared me. Logic says they're just trying another scare tactic to get their money. Panic tells me to not bother sleeping and cry at every opportunity whilst trying to hold down a responsible job without cracking up). I'm not looking for sympathy, just closure in the fairest way possible. If I have to scrape together 50% of the proceeds then so be it, I will be taking further legal advice on that and what Cabot said and yes, you are right I should un-embroil myself but that is easier said than done when family are concerned, isn't it?

welf_man

(((((GalDriver))))). Sorry I can't help, but have some support! I think you're a great person and hope this is sorted out somehow, and soon.

Mel x.

egamar

GalDriver wrote: »

you're right about the energy....I have none left.

I can see why.

I think there are three things I'd like to say here:

1. I don't think you're in as much trouble as you fear. No company in their right mind is going to drag your mother to court or enforce ridiculous repayment schedules against person in her position - no matter how she got there. They've only got this far because you're trying to do the honourable thing: so stop being nice, honourable and co-operative. Sure you have pride, but you're dealing with snakes - not the nice fellow next door you borrowed a tenner from.
2. I'm struggling to remember the name of the people involved in the 'irresponsible lending' case shown on TV where a couple on benefits were loaned £100k by a ban - or something, But you might find some ammunition if you google 'irresponsible lending' or 'irresponsible credit" which will a) help you tell these people where to go and b) help you sleep at night.
3. This is not the place to get these issues resolved. I wouldn't rely on anyone's advice you read in here: mine included. What I would use this place for is for referrals to recognised groups and individuals who will offer you proper, professional and even regulated advice or moral support, whichever you need at the time.

Maybe close this thread off, and start another in the right forum (although I can't for the life of me find a better place than here - so maybe a new thread) asking for referrals to organisations that can offer you the practical and emotional support you need and deserve. I don't know any, but I know they exist.

The very best of luck to you, and remember this is not your battle, you are just your mum's representative (and could be anyone, not even a family member) - and your mum is pretty much untouchable really - or at least she would be if there were any justice in the world.

GalDriver

Thank you all. Now this 'toughy' (for toughy read soft as s**t) gal is going before whe is a totally jibbering wreck. I continually bounce back only to be knocked down again a little while later. Your support has been invaluable with this latest blow. I had just got around to remembering that I do have a life beyond these worries and started rebuilding that and regaining energy. It didn't take much to knock me over again though so I must get tougher. you're right, I am not dealing with reasonable people. I was hoping that by my being open, honest and reasonable they would follow suit. hahahaha...... I DO realise my own naivity now because that sounds ridiculous even to me NOW. Oh well, I'm living proof that we