taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be

efes_shareholder

my test is one that shows inflammation in my digestive system although all my bloods are ok - im incredibly windy and have to medicate the pain in my side , the docs have texted to say they will discuss monday , i hate weekends !! I've resubmitted asking for sooner as i feel like the wait will escalate my anxiety and possibly my symptons.
thanks for your all reassurances , my sister has had treatment for a fast pulse before and was installing in to me that i would not forgive myself if something had happened on the back of it , i'm grateful the fall didnt happen at night because once im asleep i sleep through everything and she would have been there for however long but yes she is in the right place and as you say proffessional treatment

enthusiasticsaver

So sorry to hear your mum has fallen and would just echo others advice to take care of yourself too or you can't help your mum. Don't feel guilty at taking time out and hope your sister steps up when she can. Hopefully the tests and procedures will be done quicker though now she is in hospital. 

lucielle

How's today been?  
L

efes_shareholder

Morning 
i have never been so frustrated in my life and had a mini meltdown last night when i lost my purse somewhere with all my cards and mums in it - i've cancelled mums card but i dont have authority to request a new one !! 
Took a new mobile in to the hospital and she can't use it so everyone is on my case about that as they are trying to contact her and because she isnt picking up they are contacting me instead ! I am having the same trouble!! 
Got her a new sim as I found her actual phone but it wont recognise the sim ..............round and round in circles !! 
Shes still in hospital and now on blood thinners and antibiotics , her heart has stabilised and she is pretty much ready for discharge however the hospital are trying to get the bioposy organised whilst she is in there which may or may not be possible depending on who you talk too , we have been referred for a care package and as far as i am aware as soon as this is in place she can come home.
I've got an appt next fri for my own achy /rumbly right hand stoamch problem so I will have to have some care in place to go there 
My phone goes mad at certain times of day when everyone calls at the same time but I dont seem to be in any better position from one day to the next or be acheiving anything 

kayannie

You did well to keep you meltdown to a mini one - mine would have been mega maxi! Isn't it just typical though, just when you've got so much to be coping with, something else goes wrong. Are you still working while all this is happening? If so, could you take some leave? You will be burning yourself out at this rate.  I hope your appointment goes well. 
Take care
KA

efes_shareholder

kayannie said:

You did well to keep you meltdown to a mini one - mine would have been mega maxi! Isn't it just typical though, just when you've got so much to be coping with, something else goes wrong. Are you still working while all this is happening? If so, could you take some leave? You will be burning yourself out at this rate.  I hope your appointment goes well. 
Take care
KA

hi
I am still working and yesterday my remote connection kept dropping out and my phone kept ringing and it was extremely overwhelming .............it has to be dealt with I get that and I know I live there but it does all seem to be coming on to my shoulders , along with keeping family informed and running things to the hospital that mum needs 
I also managed to get the barrell on the front door sorted yesterday , a friend did it without any charge even for the barrell which was very kind but another example of stuff that I am sorting out !!
I could feel the meltdown coming all day , it just needed that final thing to tip me over the edge 
This afternoon the hospital have called to make an arrangement for mums biposy however they were unaware she is in hospital !!!!! despite me talking to both our cancer nurse and the ward doctor
you really couldnt make this up

Kitten868

I'm so sorry. I could have sworn I put something on here. I can't believe you're only having a mini meltdown. I would have totally lost it. Especially with them booking the biopsy but now it doesn't tie in with her being in. 
The good news is that it's even clearer still you made the right call sending her to hospital. 
What happened to your phone call with the doctors about you? Did they ring?
What happened with the Macmillan phone call? Were they helpful? I'm not asking you to keep us up to date on everything, I'm just hoping that this is a good place to get the moans out and to work out your plan to keep all the plates spinning. You have so much going on and to keep up to date with. You are doing brilliantly. Still getting things done with the house, still working, still managing things for your mum. I hope you've been having better nights having the place to yourself and not having to put anyone to bed xxxx

efes_shareholder

Kitten868 said:

I'm so sorry. I could have sworn I put something on here. I can't believe you're only having a mini meltdown. I would have totally lost it. Especially with them booking the biopsy but now it doesn't tie in with her being in. 
The good news is that it's even clearer still you made the right call sending her to hospital. 
What happened to your phone call with the doctors about you? Did they ring?
What happened with the Macmillan phone call? Were they helpful? I'm not asking you to keep us up to date on everything, I'm just hoping that this is a good place to get the moans out and to work out your plan to keep all the plates spinning. You have so much going on and to keep up to date with. You are doing brilliantly. Still getting things done with the house, still working, still managing things for your mum. I hope you've been having better nights having the place to yourself and not having to put anyone to bed xxxx

i've been staying at NM's as it feels a little bit odd being home without her , knowing that she wants to be there and to all intents I'm the reason she isn't - even if the reason for that is essentially her own well being.
i got the rubbish doctor for my consultation , he wouldnt really give me my calprotein levels but said they were slightly raised so they would normally refer to a gastro specialist , i have an appt next friday so not long to wait. I'm slightly concerned but If I dont go and its something sinister then the sooner I know the better  , no matter how scary that seems.
the whole hospital scenerio is a classic example of the right hand not knowing what the left hand is doing 

lucielle

Hope you get some answers soon?
L

Kitten868

Well at least he's referred you. I normally get we will wait and see. We will test again in 6 weeks (not that you'll be able to book in). And it's not a long wait, you're right. You'll soon get to the bottom of what's going on. I'm sure you'll do with whatever it is with strength and grace. 
I'm glad you've been at NMs. You needed the change of scenery. That house is not relaxing for you right now. 

Keep going. You're amazing. Xxx