Question about harassment

andrewthomas2008

These comments have been quite helpful. Although I'm not sure what to think now. Although I have thought about what the Police could do it he ever does say something.
Would they be willing to arrest and charge someone for talking about a past friendship. For instance if I was married and cheated on my wife and the person I cheated with informed my wife, after I'd shown evidence of harassment, could be the Police charge that person for talking about her past.
Then again that could be deemed as a malicious act, which was intended to cause alarm.

Savvy_Sue

andrewthomas2008 wrote: »

These comments have been quite helpful. Although I'm not sure what to think now. Although I have thought about what the Police could do it he ever does say something.
Would they be willing to arrest and charge someone for talking about a past relationship.

I do hope not.

But even if they did, the news would still be out.

Is that the way you want to live?

marliepanda

andrewthomas2008 wrote: »

These comments have been quite helpful. Although I'm not sure what to think now. Although I have thought about what the Police could do it he ever does say something.
Would they be willing to arrest and charge someone for talking about a past relationship. For instance if I was married and cheated on my wife and the person I cheated with informed my wife, after I'd shown evidence of harassment, could be the Police charge that person for talking about her past.
Then again that could be deemed as a malicious act, which was intended to cause alarm.

Can they arrest you for having an affair? Thats a malicious act, and would be certain to cause alarm in your wife.

There is now law that prohibits 'talking about your past' so no you cannot be arrested for that.

You say the police have 'had a word' over some unwanted gifts and a couple of texts. I still haven't seen this 'evidence of harassment' you claim.

andrewthomas2008

marliepanda wrote: »

Can they arrest you for having an affair? Thats a malicious act, and would be certain to cause alarm in your wife.

There is now law that prohibits 'talking about your past' so no you cannot be arrested for that.

You say the police have 'had a word' over some unwanted gifts and a couple of texts. I still haven't seen this 'evidence of harassment' you claim.

The Police were informed that the former friend was calling, sending messages and made calls that were unwanted. The calls and text were only responded to couple of times.

marliepanda

andrewthomas2008 wrote: »

The Police were informed that the ex was calling, sending messages and made calls that were unwanted. The calls and text weren't responded too.

When was this? Yesterday? Or years ago?

He has not been arrested for harassment. He has been told off the record to stop contacting her. There is no harassment history.

pogofish

That's not something you can be certain of - The PHA97 is pretty vague when it comes to what exactly is a warning and depending in what exactly was said/happened (eg did he sign the officer's notebook) , even an informal/verbal warning can be held on record for a year.

I don't think you will find many officers who just offer friendly advice on harassment any more - one of the main reasons behind the 97 act was number of instances of serious harassment where it emerged that off the record warnings had been repeatedly issued but ignored.

andrewthomas2008

marliepanda wrote: »

When was this? Yesterday? Or years ago?

He has not been arrested for harassment. He has been told off the record to stop contacting her. There is no harassment history.

Well she was annoyed by the messages and gifts. There hasn't been any contact for a long time now. But who knows what may happen in the future.

Savvy_Sue

andrewthomas2008 wrote: »

But who knows what may happen in the future.

One thing I am reasonably confident of is that at some point in the future, someone in your g/f's family who thinks she is a 'good muslim girl' will find out that she is a) drinking alcohol b) going out with a white b/f c) sleeping with said white b/f d) has slept with / had relationship with brother's friend e) generally not behaving as they think a 'good muslim girl' should.

And it may be nothing to do with her ex.

THAT is your fundamental problem, and the situation you should both be preparing for.

andrewthomas2008

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

One thing I am reasonably confident of is that at some point in the future, someone in your g/f's family who thinks she is a 'good muslim girl' will find out that she is a) drinking alcohol b) going out with a white b/f c) sleeping with said white b/f d) has slept with / had relationship with brother's friend e) generally not behaving as they think a 'good muslim girl' should.

And it may be nothing to do with her ex.

THAT is your fundamental problem, and the situation you should both be preparing for.

There's nothing much that can be done in all honesty, you can't charge someone for talking about their past.

Syntax753

Biggest risk in these situations is pushing things too far, and her being sent abroad to be married off. Just walk away before this gets any worse.