I want to believe I can do this!

pidge04

GlendaSugarbean wrote: »

Take care of yourself Pidge. I do think wobbles are a necessary part of the journey (says she who has had a 2-week one ). Deep breaths and one thing at a time. If you are feeling anxious and stressed, this may not be the best time for radical decisions. Can you do something nice for you today?

Thank you GlendaSugarbean. Sorry you had a 2 week wobble. We have quite a gentle day ahead thank goodness. I need to clear my head a bit.

WelshKitty85

Sending lots of virtual hugs.

efes_shareholder

pidge04 wrote: »

I am afraid I fell off the MSE wagon this week. I am not going to beat myself up too badly about it. I have used money from our savings which I will pay back. I could have used the money I am going to pay back to reduce my debt and I will feel bad about it in the coming months. I know that I will for sure. Not sure what happened exactly. I have been so consumed with worry about my daughter - worrying about EVERYTHING about her - that I temporarily stopped worrying so much about my debt. I have said yes to a couple of impromptu meet ups with friends so it has been bits of money here and there which we know all add up. It was nice though and it is done. I just have to move forwards. Pay day tomorrow. A fresh start. My holiday work ends on Sunday morning so I will be able to focus my energies on looking for new sources of income and selling stuff on eBay etc again.
I have felt terribly anxious at times this week and also inexplicably sad at times. Bad dreams too.
I had a very, very, very bad spell of I am not quite sure what - depression or anxiety, burn out, stress - a few years ago and I worry when this happens in case I am going back to that frightening time. I looked up a local counselling service the other day. It might be helpful to talk to someone. My husband is away and I am harbouring all sorts of resentments about him. I wonder whether this is the time to raise my feelings with him and our future together.
Sorry - not very MSE related but a snapshot of where I am.
Back to this business tomorrow.

Sorry to hear you have been feeling anxious - something I can resonate with from my relationship with my childrens dad , I spent many years feeling lost and unhappy as I tried to figure out the future and where I was with things
Take one day at a time and don't approach anything until you know you what you want to do and feel you have the strength to see it through - These things are emotionally draining even when we know our choice is the right one.

Try and find a close friend to confide in , you will be surprised how many have found themselves in similar situations and will have empathy and words of wisdom for you.
Its also good to talk , the burden is lifted when you share the thoughts.

Finally , take care of you first - we only get one life and we deserve to be happy xx

I am sure the days out you have planned will help you feel brighter and give you something to look forward too - Don't beat yourself up about the expense , it is covered and you are doing so well with the debt you deserve the odd diversion of the path.Look at it as a slightly more scenic route , not a car crash !

pidge04

Monday. A fresh start. I am going to be starting over.

I am going to do a new SOA.

I have collected up the loose change from around the house and car. I will deposit that into my account.

I will resume my selling today.

I have registered my details for babysitting but I think I have to fork out £25 to be able to message any parents about possible babysitting jobs.

I spent a lot of time yesterday looking for part time work I could somehow fit in around my full time job and my child. I really need something for a Friday night or early on a Saturday/Sunday morning and Saturday night. I really like the Tesco jobs website - states which shifts they are looking to fill. Nothing suitable right now but I will look everyday. Unfortunately, I will not be able to do anything that keeps me too long from my child as she really needs me. Also, my husband spends quite a bit of time out of the country for his job and on holiday. Realistically, babysitting is my best option. Or teaching English online although I would prefer babysitting if I am honest. I cannot be too fussy though.

I have a freezer full of meals.

I have hardly used my car this summer holiday. Petrol spends have been low. Fewer trips to out of town supermarkets. The fewer miles I do, the sooner I can change my car and therefore save money.

I can only really do minimum payments on my credit cards this morning but hopefully I will be in a better situation next month.

Yesterday was a no spend day. Today I need to buy some bread and milk.

Feeling slightly apprehensive about this re-boot!

pidge04

The bank phoned me over the weekend to say have I considered consolidating my overdraft and credit card with a loan? I said that my plan is to pay them off by increasing my income and that I will be breaking that cycle.

pidge04

Come on, me! Debt freedom is exactly 2 years away. 24 pay days away.

LexieLou

Good Morning Pidge, how are you?

Nice to have a reboot every now and then, its like a good spring clean.

Be kind to yourself.

LL xx

pidge04

Thank you LL. I am ok. I really hope I can beat this. How are you?

LexieLou

pidge04 wrote: »

Thank you LL. I am ok. I really hope I can beat this. How are you?

I'm good...worried about the next 9 years, but considering I've spent the last 21 in debt, 9 more isn't a huge ask...(not)

Night hun xxx

System

pidge04 wrote: »

The bank phoned me over the weekend to say have I considered consolidating my overdraft and credit card with a loan? I said that my plan is to pay them off by increasing my income and that I will be breaking that cycle.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS! You tell them.