Can we stop employees from having direct contact?

undercoverirish

And obviously there is now this issue with this guy and her having had their flirtation going on and obviously it has went sour.

This is a very difficult situatin and in a small team, I!!!8217;m not sure how to deal with it. Throw a woman into a group of men and their brains seem to go to mush. At least one of them does anyway

marliepanda

undercoverirish wrote: »

And I see your point but how can I stop the guys all being friendly with one another? It!!!8217;s impossible to do so.

I obviously don!!!8217;t wish for one of the team to be excluded but if the guys want to sit and chat about their personal lives to each other and what not, I can!!!8217;t make them include her if they!!!8217;re talking about matter inappropriate for her or that might offend her.

You can not discipline her for doing the same? That could be a start.

And tell him to pull himself together. and sort his own love life out.

undercoverirish

The discipline action was definitely not the right thing to do. Definitly not.

I admit, they do have banter. They!!!8217;re just that type of group. But they!!!8217;re also good at their job, as is she.

I think it!!!8217;ll be Monday before I!!!8217;m able to get speaking to the HR company but hopefully they!!!8217;ll advise me on what to do and maybe how to manage it going forward.

My instinct was to let her go as I felt it was upsetting the flock so to speak but I!!!8217;m pleased I!!!8217;ve come on here and also pleased I!!!8217;ve heard a bit more background about what has happened. The guy maybe was a bit embarrassed too by it all as well as trying to appease his wife

undercoverirish

She has just put a formal complaint in

elsien

Good on her.
Banter can often be code for sidelining people who are different to the rest of the group. Personally, I hate the phrase. There's a very fine line between "banter" and bullying/exclusion. And not just between genders.
And it's certainly not his brains that appear to have landed him in this situation.

suki1964

if anyone should go it should be the guy, plain and simple

You have now made a woman working in a male envoirment job even more difficult

You have to stop defining people by their sex, they are your workforce and all have to be treated equally

Read back that last post, you are once again making excuses for the guy. That guy has cost you a lot of heartache at the very least. Sod his embarrassment, discipline him, be the boss, not one of the lads

suki1964

undercoverirish wrote: »

She has just put a formal complaint in

Good on her

Would love to see how this pans out for the guy and his wife

undercoverirish

Yea I get it, she!!!8217;s a nice girl and really friendly with everyone so he!!!8217;s probably picked that up as a signal.

She feels that the complaint raised wouldn!!!8217;t have been raised against another male employee and that we have taken sides without hearing her side and automatically chose to discipline her without investigating the matter.

undercoverirish

I don!!!8217;t mean to be making excuses for him at all, I will be more conscious about what I say.

This is probably the worse thing that could have happened bar maybe losing all of our customers in the same month.

Comms69

undercoverirish wrote: »

Yea I get it, she!!!8217;s a nice girl and really friendly with everyone so he!!!8217;s probably picked that up as a signal.

She feels that the complaint raised wouldn!!!8217;t have been raised against another male employee and that we have taken sides without hearing her side and automatically chose to discipline her without investigating the matter.

And she's right.


Whether that is actionable at this stage is down to how the company responds.