Debt Free By 2019?

lonelyrat

Hope mini golf was fun! OH and I played once and I got so competitive we had to say we wouldn't play again. I don't like to lose it seems

onedaysomeday

Haha!

It was good fun, OH won but he's very good at all of these thing, 7yo had a 'handicap' for each hole which annoyed the 11yo but I pointed out that he had started some of his over and that's against the rules too so he couldn't moan :rotfl:

Car is in the garage.. was super super nervous as I have not driven it in over a week, lost my faith in my driving skills a bit after the stalling episodes last week and coupled with the horrible exhaust noise and the loose steering, I've kind of avoided it. I wouldn't have been so nervous if it wasn't later in the morning than I normally go. The traffic at the roundabout by my work builds up between 7.30 and 8am quite heavily so I normally leave around 7.20, or just go to the gym to miss it all together. The garage didn't open until 8 though and after google mapping there wasn't even anywhere I could sit in the car and wait as it was all no waiting after 7.30am, so just had to leave later knowing I would probably hit traffic.

It was fine though, traffic was okay and I didn't get in anyone's way or wait too long to go at roundabouts (or stall!) so it was fine. They had agreed to drop me to work if I took it at 8, but I didn't realise it meant me driving my car back so I asked the mechanic if he would drive as I was still nervous in my car after last week and with all the things that need doing, which he looked a little bemused but agreed to it lol :rotfl:

I was going to ask them to quote for the steering today and he asked if I wanted them to price it today or actually do it today, so I said if they call first and let me know the price it should be fine for them to do it. Will need to go on the CC but I have the money ready at the end of the month in my wages (budgeted for anyway) so it's just a case of rejigging it a little, which I'm happy to do if it means having everything fixed today

So feeling good knowing my car will be much better to drive later on

lonelyrat

I'm glad you were OK with the car! Ages ago when I took lessons I remember stalling at a roundabout which was up a hill... I kept trying to move off and then rolling down the hill and then stalling again and it was just a mess! There were loads of people behind me as well and it was so awful. May actually be why I stopped learning :rotfl: Am still feeling quite traumatised from it all....

onedaysomeday

Not much to report at the moment, feeling very down in the dumps and unhappy with chunks of my life at the moment so trying to work out how to move forwards everything in my head, I imagine I will report back later with a vague plan I will struggle to stick to, but hoping this time will be different...!

snorfing_along

Sending positive vibes and even a vague plan sets you off in a direction to move off from where you are and change things you're not happy with.


Also when I'm feeling rubbish I think it's good to look at how far you've come and what you've achieved

onedaysomeday

Thanks snorfing - working through what things I am unhappy with, and what I can do to change them. I imagine that will be two separate stressy posts open to suggestions from MSE'rs

I'm constantly making plans and not being able to stick to them then getting even more stressed!

snorfing_along

Maybe look at why your plans are difficult to stick to and work on that - maybe things need to be broken down into small tasks to start with or maybe there is a different route you can take to get your end goal?
We're all here to help and cheer you on; and offer any support and advice we can

onedaysomeday

I think I generally do set small achievable tasks, I'm just really lacking in motivation all the time.

I am constantly tired though which I am going to see the doctors about, and low mood and low self esteem which I have a telephone appointment with our NHS Wellbeing team about so hopefully my motivation will come back soon!

onedaysomeday

Right... the stressy stuff, a.k.a problems (followed in the next post by solutions)

1) Debt, obviously. It often gets me down the mess that I am, I quite often wonder about if I hadn't messed up in the past how comfortable my life would be, if I would have a mortgage (which is at least 4 years off thanks to my CCJ), the things OH and I could be doing if I wasn't paying out a chunk of my wages on debt repayments every month. This is probably the most pointless point as I wouldn't be on the forum (nor would everyone else) if we didn't have this problem. Stating the obvious methinks

2) Not running due to injury. Going out with the running club was my only social life outside of seeing family and OH, so as well as the massive drop in fitness, my social life has fizzled out and died too. Probably one of my favourite things too was beating times and distance targets, it gave me a real sense of achievement. No running really since January since an injury (which I believe was a stress fracture, hospital no use) and a re-injury after I ran too much too soon

3) No social life. Zero. Nada. 2-3 nights I see OH, or OH and kids, and the remaining nights I am at home. This is because I live with people who are almost family and to whom I pay cheap rent, so there is an expectation I will actually be there a decent amount of time. Other than that, no friends really. I have always just had work friends and they dwindle away when you leave, haven't seen any from my old job for nearly a year, and they work for OH so would probably feel uncomfortable. Also means I feel resentment when OH gets to go out with them for staff dos

4) My job. My job is DULL. I work by myself, unsupervised with the occasional check in, and the money and hours are the only thing that get me through the 50 hours a week, I can't really afford to take a paycut with my outgoings as they are, and it pays well for not needing any real qualifications

5) My mental health. I seem to have acquired an ever increasing issue of constantly comparing myself and my life to that of others, which I acknowledge is depressing as hell, but I can't seem to stop myself doing it? Definitely leads onto the low self esteem and quite a lot of jealousy and a bit of resentment, then anger towards myself

6) I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I AM DOING WITH MY LIFE! I have no set career goals, I don't even know what career I would want to get into. I have no proper qualifications other than my A-Levels or GCSE's, never went to Uni, have dabbled in a few home learning courses but there is nothing I am passionate about. I'd like to try and get into proofreading (I think) as I think I'd enjoy it, I like the concept of correcting work and seem to be quite good at it, and I like the idea of reading content that hasn't been published, but I can't afford college or another home learning course. I did put an ad on gumtree to do it at a very cheap rate to build a portfolio, but no takers

Congratulations if you are not bored yet

onedaysomeday

Onto the more positive stuff... solutions (where I have any)

1) Debts.
This I know, for the most part, is just a waiting game. I don't have much wiggle room at the moment for the next couple of months to pay out any more than I do. I have a new budget sheet in place starting from next month when my car repairs are done (hopefully for a long while) that incorporates slightly more debt repayments and savings again also, which I had to drop for the last few months. I need to amp up as well how much I am hunting for surveys and ways to make extra little bits to make little overpayments where I can. I honestly don't think any survey money this month has gone on overpayments

2) Running.
Again, a waiting game I think. Mainly as OH and I are training for 100km walk and need my foot to hold out as best as I can to be able to do the walk, and any running or high impact may hamper this. Going rate to see a sports injury person about my foot is £35 for the intial consultation and £37 per session afterwards, if I can find some money to put aside I will book in for this

3) Social Life. I don't really know what to put as a solution here. I'm quite introverted until I get to know people. The only places I go are work, home, gym and to see OH so not sure where I can fit in meeting people there. There are no gym classes outside my work hours. I think this may just have to wait until I get back running

4) My Job. Again, not much I can do here until I am in a position to take a pay cut. I sit in front of a screen for 10 hours a day, with not a huge amount to do other than take in parcels and deal with any resident's problems that may arise. I'm not very productive and I enjoy being busy.

5) My Mental Health. I have a telephone appointment coming up with the NHS Wellbeing service to do an assessment over the phone, then I think they try and work out how to help you i.e. counselling etc. I don't know how well this would work around my job is my main concern here, but I am determined to try and make it work!

6) Again, no answer here. I don't have a passion for anything so unless I stumble across the career of my dreams or one that I am very interested in, I'm out of ideas. I'm just not really where I thought I'd be at 26, most of my school/college friends are in specific fields, getting up the career ladder, etc. Even just an interesting job where I can work my way up to a good paying career would be better than just floating around which is what I seem to do at the minute...

Not positive the whole way through, but some bits I am stumped on. Suggestions welcome....