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  • beanielou
    beanielou Posts: 95,667 Ambassador
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Academoney Grad Mortgage-free Glee!
    Sorry to hear your news.
    He was still your dad so no wonder that you feeel weird.
    She should have at least sent you a PM xx
    I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.

    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.

    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
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  • milann
    milann Posts: 11,410 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Not surprised you are feeling confused SA - he was still your dad. Virtual hugs.

    Enjoy your new phone and enjoy Mr SA enjoying his.

    It’s so annoying when they pester for things and then don’t do anything with them - Mr Milann might be good at cooking for me ( he used to be a chef) but he has been known on far too many occasions to NEED something - spend days researching then putting them in his man cave of a bedroom or shed.......not the same league as Mr SA though....
    January spends - £587.58
  • mummytogirls
    mummytogirls Posts: 6,578 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    So sorry to read your news SA, still a shock as you say.

    Glad youve got sorted with your new phone. Theres no wonder we all spend so much time on them nowadays as they just organise our lives for us :rotfl:. Mr SA made me laugh saying it was a good phone for the elderly :rotfl:, he sounds like my Dad and a similar age haha!!! xx
    Mummytogirls x

  • Sorry to hear you've had such a shock about your dad SA. It's an odd situation, but you must feel sad at what could have been if he had been a different type of person. Be kind to yourself until you start to feel less strange about it. X
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 😱 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017 :T 🎉
    EMERGENCY FUND 1 = £50/£5,000. EMERGENCY FUND 2 = £10/£5,000.
    CHRISTMAS SAVINGS = £0/£500. SEF = £1,400/£12,000 PREMIUM BONDS ME = £350. PREMIUM BONDS DH = £300.
    HOLIDAY MONEY = £0 TIME LEFT TO PAY OFF MORTGAGE = 5 YEARS 1 MONTHS
  • sashybo
    sashybo Posts: 4,595 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Hi SA, popping out of lurkdom to say sorry about your dad.

    I'm in a similar situation with a "dad" who left & I haven't seen him since I was around 9. I too have half siblings who I am "friends" with on Facebook but we never interact. I sometimes see posts that my half sister puts up about what a great dad she has & how lucky she is & it makes me feel weird. Not angry or jealous, just - odd.

    Why is it that his new children mattered enough that he bothered to stick around for them but my sister & I from his first marriage didn't/don't matter? He just never seemed to have any interest in us after he left & still doesn't. Not that I'm interested in having any kind of relationship with him either now but I don't understand it.

    I think I'll probably be in your situation in the future re finding out & I don't know how I'll feel about it. I hope you're being kind to yourself no matter how you feel.

    I'll retreat back into lurkdom now after my over-share. :eek: :rotfl:
    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. Car loan 1 £11,174, Car loan 2 £5,532, CC 0% BT £780. Debt Free Diary to try & keep spending in check.
  • Cherryfudge
    Cherryfudge Posts: 13,306 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I'm sorry to hear your news, SA. As others have said, take care of yourself x
    I think a bit of sunshine is good for frugal living. (Cranky40)
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  • Sun_Addict
    Sun_Addict Posts: 24,095 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Thanks folks for all your kind comments :)

    Sashybo thanks for sharing that - you echoed exactly how I feel. My half sister was always putting on FB how great her/my dad was, it's a weird feeling.

    DS told me yesterday his GF's dad walks past her in the street or hides. Her step dad is more of a dad to her.

    Back to work tomorrow - not bothered really as I love my job and it will be good to have some space away from Mr SA after 2 weeks with him.

    It's a miserable rainy day here at the moment. Hoping it will dry up a bit as I could do with going to Aldi for some fruit and veg.

    Need to have a quick tidy up/clean round before the state visit later today. Not complaining though as SIL always gives Mr SA a telling off for being lazy.

    Need to do something about Virgin Media as DD has informed me her box isn't working and she's paying £10 a month for it. Plus they keep putting the price up and we only really watch Freeview channels and DD mainly watches Netflix. I'm going to do a comparison of prices so I'm armed and ready for the phone call to Virgin, I need to sound like I know what I'm talking about.

    Loving my new phone, it's a million times better than my old one, makes me realise just how out of date and slow it was.

    Have a fab Sunday everyone :)
    I get knocked down but I get up again (Chumbawamba, Tubthumping)
  • Sounds like your Dad wasn't much of a dad but still sad for you to lose the possibility of a good relationship with him had he made more effort. In a marriage breakdown though you never know the forces at play. My DHs dad left his mum when he was a baby and never saw him until he was 16 and his much older brother took him to meet him. Apparently his mum had discouraged a relationship between DH and his dad. They rekindled their relationship but it was never a good father/son one. He looked on my Dad as more of a father which was doubly sad as he died at only 62.

    I love my iPhone 7 too.
    I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Debt free Wannabe, Budgeting and Banking and Savings and Investment boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.

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  • beanielou
    beanielou Posts: 95,667 Ambassador
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Academoney Grad Mortgage-free Glee!
    Maybe your SIL will encourage Mr SA to do some wee jobs :)
    I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.

    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.

    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.
  • beanielou wrote: »
    Maybe your SIL will encourage Mr SA to do some wee jobs :)

    Like the garden!

    Glad you find your new phone so much better.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 😱 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017 :T 🎉
    EMERGENCY FUND 1 = £50/£5,000. EMERGENCY FUND 2 = £10/£5,000.
    CHRISTMAS SAVINGS = £0/£500. SEF = £1,400/£12,000 PREMIUM BONDS ME = £350. PREMIUM BONDS DH = £300.
    HOLIDAY MONEY = £0 TIME LEFT TO PAY OFF MORTGAGE = 5 YEARS 1 MONTHS
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