Divorce proceedings

trojan10_om

Mojisola wrote: »

So £1630+ a month without your child maintenance contribution.

She'll get a reduction on the CT as a single occupier and the food bill will be reduced - not a bad financial position.

I've got no way of verifying those figures, but it looks like that is what she is entitled to.

trojan10_om

clairec79 wrote: »

Child tax and working tax will go on yearly income - so if she was on a very good income prior to maternity pay that may knock her out of qualifying (however as you mention 12 months maternity leave and May I'm guessing she left work May last year - so she'd have to have had a LOT in April and May for her annual income to be above the limit, if all she's got is SMP for the rest of the year

You also mention child care, does she NEED child care for the next year (I know some people like to keep it during maternity leave to keep the child's space in nursery etc open for when they return) but realistically you have to decide if financially it is affordable (and child care can be claimed on tax credits too)

If there is only one adult in the house council tax goes down by 25% too (and thats without any discount she may get for low income)

She worked part time, 3 days per weekbetween April 2016 and May 2017.

Our eldest currently goes to Pre School, partly to keep her place like you say. There is a possibility on the fees being reduced due to her income, but I have no way of verifying. Obviously it would be sad if our daughter couldn't attend due to to our separation, so I'm keep to make sure funds are ringfenced for this (e.g childcare vouchers)

bluebear36

trojan10_om wrote: »

It's not 100% her fault, but it was 100% her decision. She of course thinks it's 100% my fault.

The reasons she gave, I don't entirely dispute, but I wanted more time to work it out

- I've changed as a person since we had children
- I've focused on work and the children and ignored her
- There was a couple of occasions towards the end where I shouted quite loudly over something small - usually in esculation to a two way arguemet.

Anyway, that still doesn't paint the full picture. I was hoping to gain advice on practical steps. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the reason for breakup shouldn't have any bearing on the advice should it?

Sound like it's too little, too late

trojan10_om

bluebear36 wrote: »

Whilst the reason of the breakdown of their marriage has no bearing, the attitude from many posters is that SHE is the one to blame. There's also, of course, the opinion that being female, she WILL try to get all THEIR money. We only have the OPs version of events, so people should try to be less bitter & twisted.

I would rather people just be neutral. Ultimately if there is any chance of working things out be mediation, I need to be practical about this and understand what expectations are.

trojan10_om

bluebear36 wrote: »

Sound like it's too little, too late

Sadly yes.

mgdavid

bluebear36 wrote: »

Sound like it's too little, too late

but irrelevant for the thread. Cannot understand why you seem intent on pursuing this red herring.

seven-day-weekend

Maybe he was out working hard providing for her and the children?

You say why should she lose the house and children - fine. But why should he?

Anyway, I agree it is irrelevant for the terms of this discussion

jamesperrett

trojan10_om wrote: »

Our eldest currently goes to Pre School, partly to keep her place like you say. There is a possibility on the fees being reduced due to her income, but I have no way of verifying.

If your eldest is 2, it won't be long before they qualify for a free pre-school place for at least some of the week.

bluebear36

mgdavid wrote: »

but irrelevant for the thread. Cannot understand why you seem intent on pursuing this red herring.

Read my posts, you're completely missing the point!

bluebear36

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Maybe he was out working hard providing for her and the children?

You say why should she lose the house and children - fine. But why should he?

Anyway, I agree it is irrelevant for the terms of this discussion

I'd accept your relevance comment if you were also making it to the posters slating the wife.

Btw she also has been working to provide, as well as being the primary caregiver. Nowhere did I say he should lose the house and kids, but she is equally as entitled to have them.