Divorce proceedings

mark5

She could also return to work sooner if she's that hard up for money.

Mojisola

trojan10_om wrote: »

My contribution is £1,600

Our mortgage, internet, utilities, council tax and petrol and childcare adds up to £1,200. We probably spend about £400 a month on food/supermarket items.

trojan10_om wrote: »

I've done the 'entitled to calculations' to the best of my knowledge.

It looks like she could be entitled to the following per week:

£140 maternity pay
£85 working tax credit (can she get that on maternity??)
£117 Child tax credit
£34.40 Child benefit

So £1630+ a month without your child maintenance contribution.

She'll get a reduction on the CT as a single occupier and the food bill will be reduced - not a bad financial position.

bluebear36

OP, you say you the weren't the perfect husband; can you give some examples please?

I just don't for a second believe that someone with two very small children ends their marriage like this without an extremely good reason!

Tigsteroonie

bluebear36 wrote: »

OP, you say you the weren't the perfect husband; can you give some examples please?

I just don't for a second believe that someone with two very small children ends their marriage like this without an extremely good reason!

What does it matter?

He's asking for advice on where to go from here, and he's made it clear that counselling and returning are not options.

clairec79

Child tax and working tax will go on yearly income - so if she was on a very good income prior to maternity pay that may knock her out of qualifying (however as you mention 12 months maternity leave and May I'm guessing she left work May last year - so she'd have to have had a LOT in April and May for her annual income to be above the limit, if all she's got is SMP for the rest of the year

You also mention child care, does she NEED child care for the next year (I know some people like to keep it during maternity leave to keep the child's space in nursery etc open for when they return) but realistically you have to decide if financially it is affordable (and child care can be claimed on tax credits too)

If there is only one adult in the house council tax goes down by 25% too (and thats without any discount she may get for low income)

bluebear36

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

What does it matter?

He's asking for advice on where to go from here, and he's made it clear that counselling and returning are not options.

It matters because a large proportion of the posters are acting as if the split is 100% her fault, and that she deserves to lose the kids and her home because of it!

There are two sides to every story and maybe people should remember that.

Tigsteroonie

bluebear36 wrote: »

It matters because a large proportion of the posters are acting as if the split is 100% her fault, and that she deserves to lose the kids and her home because of it!

There are two sides to every story and maybe people should remember that.

On the contrary, most posters are holding the correct view that regardless who is to blame for the breakdown of the marriage he has equal rights to the house and to the children at this stage. They are therefore putting forward sensible ways forward, given that she has no earned income just now.

Reason for breakdown of the marriage has very little bearing on the resultant financial division.

hollydays

Yes there are two sides to every story
We are only going to get one persons version here

trojan10_om

It's not 100% her fault, but it was 100% her decision. She of course thinks it's 100% my fault.

The reasons she gave, I don't entirely dispute, but I wanted more time to work it out

- I've changed as a person since we had children
- I've focused on work and the children and ignored her
- There was a couple of occasions towards the end where I shouted quite loudly over something small - usually in esculation to a two way arguemet.

Anyway, that still doesn't paint the full picture. I was hoping to gain advice on practical steps. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the reason for breakup shouldn't have any bearing on the advice should it?

bluebear36

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

On the contrary, most posters are holding the correct view that regardless who is to blame for the breakdown of the marriage he has equal rights to the house and to the children at this stage. They are therefore putting forward sensible ways forward, given that she has no earned income just now.

Reason for breakdown of the marriage has very little bearing on the resultant financial division.

Whilst the reason of the breakdown of their marriage has no bearing, the attitude from many posters is that SHE is the one to blame. There's also, of course, the opinion that being female, she WILL try to get all THEIR money. We only have the OPs version of events, so people should try to be less bitter & twisted.