MeandO's mortgage-free musings

MeandO

Thanks HSL2. Yes, there are several campsites nearby as this is a bit of a touristy area, but there are also some nice ones within an hour's drive that would feel like a great holiday to us I'm sure!

MeandO

It's payday, so I've done the usual bank account shuffle and updated YNAB which tells me this month will have to be a frugal one as I have DS's swimming lessons and school lunches up until the summer holidays to pay for amongst other things.

I have still managed to top up all my savings pots though. I would like not to have to dip into any of these this month, but I wouldn't be surprised if one of them takes a hit.
I have no idea how I will reach the £150 OP target this month, but I will try my hardest. Think I might have to resort to ebaying the little pile I have built up. That will be a start anyway.

I've paid £50 off the credit card this morning taking it down to £630.

The emergency savings are now up to £1k whch I'm pleased with. I am aiming to build it up to at least £5k, so I'm 20% of the way there.

I have the lurgy and am feeling very queasy and congested today. I'm hoping I get rid of it in the next day as I can't go and see my parents whilst being ill. My Mum's is so poorly that a simple cold or virus could have a catastrophic effect on her. She will be devastated if we can't go as she has been so lookig forward to seeing us, especially DS.

MeandO

We haven’t been able to go and see my parents as planned as i’ve been really poorly which resulted in a late night trip to the emergency doc at the weekend. !!!128532; I have two infections going on it seems, a chest infection and one from issues from a wisdom tooth. Looks like I’ll need it out, but having terrible trouble trying to register with a dentist here.
DS is also showing signs of a cold now too. I really hope he doesn’t have what I have been suffering with this past week. OH seems to have the start of it as well. Thoroughly fed up and not feeling at all well. !!!128532;

I’ve just caught YNAB up with all the spends of the past few days. There have been many, mostly groceries, lots of ys bits for the freezer, some groceries for OH’s house as I’ve been staying there and wanted to contribute; a pair of cropped jeans for me (£16) and a bag full of ‘stuff’ for gifts, parties and cheap garden toys for the nice weather from £land. I picked up a puzzle for my Mum from the works (£6) and I have also bought a Christmas present for OH’s niece too. !!!128527;
Today I need to buy a summer duvet for DS as I went to put last year’s on his bed last night and forgot he now has a double duvet and covers as opposed to the single. I may price up a black out blind for his room as well. We shall also try and ‘cash in’ a huge tin of loose change my Dad gave us a month or so ago and DS wants to spend some pocket money in a toy shop today.

Other than that it’s chilling on the sofa for us two. Xx

MeandO

We popped to B&M and picked up a duvet for DS (£6.99), cling film and some biscuits for DS. I also managed to drop off two black bags to the charity shop that I have had in the boot for about a month.

I’ve put the new bedside table together for the spare room, bought in the Tesco direct sale; cleared a load of cardboard boxes and put batteries in various toys, torches and a camping lamp.

One load of washing is drying on the line alongside the new duvet which is outside to air before going on DS’s bed tonight.

I’m trying to talk DS into doing an activity together but he’s only really interested in watching tv or playing mine craft atm and I don’t really have the energy to keep trying today. He’s happy ‘just chilling’ apparently, but I still feel like I should be doing something a bit more exciting with him.

No op’s to report yet unfortunately.

MeandO

So, after spending £33.50 on entrance fees to ‘something more exciting’ today, I think we should’ve stuck with yesterday’s plan of ‘just chilling out’. :eek: We drove for almost an hour to a tourist attraction that we were excited about seeing, unfortunately it was really disappointing and we’d left within an hour and a half. :mad:

We took a packed lunch but ate that early and were both hungry on the way home so stopped of at McD’s and spent £7.28 there too. :eek:
DS spent £10 of his saved pocket money on some Lego in a nearby shop and I picked up some plastic bowls for camping at £1 for 4 and a bag of chocolate for the way home for £1. It was needed. Believe me.
To add insult to injury, we got stuck in a 2 hour traffic jam on the motorway on the way home. That’ll teach me to venture out far eh?!

I’ve updated YNAB with today’s spends and am now cooking DS a gammon roast dinner of sorts with a ys joint of ham bought last week.

I’m back at work tomorrow and am gutted. I feel like i’ve missed half term, missed spending fun time with my boy and missed seeing my parents. still feeling ill too.

MeandO

It’s been an emotionally difficult couple of days. The ex and I hadn’t been getting along that great the past few weeks, mostly from me fed up with him taking the p... and him not being able to see that, anyway, we have had a chat and managed to sort things out and agreed to talk more. I then learn that he is selling his house and buying a house jointly with his gf once she has sold hers. She has 3 kids so, with my DS in the mix, they need more space than either of their current houses can offer them. I’m happy for him, I really am. His gf is lovely and I really like her and know she looks after DS who also loves playing with her kids. I just feel a little bit sad that the ex can offer DS the ready made big family and fun and all he has when he’s with me, is me. I’m so scared of losing DS as he’ll Have so much fun in the ‘family house’ with everyone and all the excitement of having lots of people to play with.
I guess i’m also a bit envious, not in a nasty way, of the companionship and laughs and normal family life that the ex will now be having which is all I want in life but can never see it happening for me. My OH is wonderful but there is no commitment to a future together from him. No talk of how he’d like our lives to be or whether we’d ever end up married or even living together. There’s not even a photo up in his house of me or the two of us together. He doesn’t live or think like that and just lives each day for what it’s worth. I would absolutely not work us living together with our children either for various reasons.
I guess it’s just the reality of the ex who has a lovely life ahead of him now and for me, life holds nothing to look forward to. It’s all about getting through the days. At least one of us had the happy ending, I suppose.
I feel so very sad at the moment. I am off work as I am still poorly, but yesterday all I could do was cry.
Today has been a little easier, but not a lot.

As a result of feeling so low, i’ve spent way too much money and lost track of everything, even though YNAB is up to date.

Will have to update when i’m Feeling brighter.

Moneyfordreams

I think they are normally emotions to change.. take care of yourself. I'm sure your son appreciates the calm and comfort he receives from you and his home after being at a busy household

Honeysucklelou2

Sorry that half term hasn't worked out as you had planned. Hope you are feeling better today.


Big family life is an experience but your DS will get one to one attention from you which is important.

MrsSave

:grouphug:

I'm sorry that you're feeling so low at the moment. It doesn't matter how much your ds will enjoy with his dad, he will also totally love spending time with you. You are his mum, and I can assure you that you have nothing to worry about with him wanting to spend time with you. It's so obvious from your diary that you have a lovely relationship, and you have plenty to offer him.

Do you want more from your oh? Have you spoken with him about your future and about what you both want?

If you want a chat, please pm me xx

plymouthscubagirl

Hey you

Sorry I've been MIA over half-term. Actually I've been camping a lot of it and you will love it with DS. I did part camping/caravaning and then wigwams up in somerset, then back to the caravan in Cornwall. Take lots of card games with you, and bits to occupy him in the morning (if you're early risers) and you'll be fine. Sounds like Minecraft on a console maybe more appropriate They all have their time and place I believe!

Please don't worry about your ex moving on, although its completely natural to feel the way you are. My ex was supposed to be moving in with his gf and children too last week (more coincidences in our parallel lives) although he hasn't yet so not sure whats happening?! I daren't ask tbh as it seems very up and down. Shame as I sat DS down to explain the changes and he was very excited about it all. You'd laugh though as if you actually asked DS why he was happy the response would surprise you! In your case you feel like you're not providing/giving him this family life - what it boiled down to in this case was they had a Nintendo Switch :rotfl:!! Like others have said, they do love a little quiet one on one time so its nice they are getting the best of both worlds. Plus they're learning to share/compromise which is something I always worried/felt guilty about by just having the 1 child.

So on with things that you do have control over - camping! How about a trial run in the garden one weekend soon? You will realise bits and pieces that you may/may not require ready for the big camping trip?

If it makes you feel any better I too have the work blues today plus a little of the woe betide me blues too. Really could have gone sick. Everyone seems to be buying houses, moving in, getting a life etc, but this comparing stuff is no good for our heads! We really don't know what goes on in others lives so no point thinking that way!

I'm back on my Financial Freedom/Early retirement drive today. Need to get creative in paying debts off faster!

PM me if you need to moan xxx