How to deal with a brother TAKEN over parents finances..

Rags2riches

Pollycat wrote: »

What do you mean 'little they could do'?

There was (and still is) lots they could do.
They could have listened to you.
They could have listened to family.
They had ample opportunity to stop this when interviewed by the Police Fraud Squad.

They could have wised up when they realised:


I think you need to wise up and accept that they believe your brother is doing nothing wrong (or don't wish to believe it) and until that changes all the posting on here is not going to get you anywhere.

There was little the Police could do.

Malthusian

annandale wrote: »

Absolute nonsense.

To be quite honest I was leaning towards the whole thing being a wind up as well. £50k pension income makes you a millionaire, if you ignore the fact that you can't cash it in.

As I said earlier, to amass that much pension income you would typically have either had a £500k+ pension fund or a high-earning job with a defined benefits pension - doctor, lecturer, senior government official - or some combination of the two. (In theory they could also both have been middle-ranking council managers for 30-40 years and retired on two full pensions but that's an atypical combination.)

So it is difficult to reconcile the fact that at least one of the OP's parents had a high degree of financial acumen, and yet despite both only being in late middle age, they are acting as if they have no capacity to look after themselves at all.

That said, I don't think it's a wind up. Stranger things have happened.

Article50

Is there any mileage in you going to see your mother's bank manager and telling him the situation. Clearly he wont divulge sums but at least he would be aware.

Secondly it is now perfectly feasible to put all the accounts into a software package which gives you finger tip CONTROL. Some packages are free most are round the £35-£50 mark.

You could mention setting this up for your mother and password protect it so she is the only access. There is no limit on the number of accounts they handle, I looked at mine and I am over 35 including closed accounts. You/she will need all the statements for all accounts and change the passwords to all accounts etc as well.

Use of such software requires a bit of discipline but that is I believe that is already present.

The previous mention of spreadsheets fills me with dread and indicates fraud/deceit/confusion to underpin control to me.

The long term future looks very bleak for your parents, Bankruptcy,care home fees and penury unless they take control from your idle brother.

Pollycat

Rags2riches wrote: »

There was little the Police could do.

I can't find your post where you mention the Police Fraud Squad but Tygermoth referenced it here:

Tygermoth wrote: »

quote from the OP - I've been to the police (specifically the fraud team) and provided the statements with no further action. My mother was interviewed and claimed at the time she knew all about it and had allowed it - to prevent him getting into any trouble.

Of course there was little the Police could do - your Mother backed up your brother against your allegations.

I reiterate - there is lots your Mother could do - if she wished to.
But until she does, this is not going anywhere.

AndyBSG

I would seriously recommend the OP read through this thread to understand how far this could escalate

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4764044

Your parents need intervention, NOW, regardless of if they do it voluntarily or involuntarily.

Pollycat

AndyBSG wrote: »

I would seriously recommend the OP read through this thread to understand how far this could escalate

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4764044

Your parents need intervention, NOW, regardless of if they do it voluntarily or involuntarily.

And if the OP involves anybody involuntarily, his Mum will just back up his brother as she has done in the past.

She needs to have her lightbulb moment and acknowledge what her son has been doing before anyone can help her.

As the OP has said - there is little anyone can do until his Mum wises up.

Malthusian

AndyBSG wrote: »

I would seriously recommend the OP read through this thread to understand how far this could escalate

Escalate? The more tragic aspects of that case aside, that involved a brother who had stolen £20,000 in savings and another £50,000 in ongoing income from the OP's dad, leaving him with nothing.

In this case the OP's brother has apparently stolen anything north of £200,000, leaving the OP's parents with £140,000 less than nothing, in credit card debts and overdrafts.

It is not so much the amounts that are important (when someone steals everything from you, it's equally painful whether it's £20,000 or £20 million). It's the fact that they are so deep in debt, and the mess will clearly be much more difficult to untangle, that means it has already escalated well beyond the tragedy in that thread.

luckbox

Malthusian wrote: »

5-10 accounts would suggest the brother was maximising high-interest regular savers and current accounts. (I remember one guy on this forum saying he had 12-15 current accounts - he wanted to find out how he could get an Attorney to maintain this arrangement when he was no longer compos mentis enough. For free.)

30 accounts = money laundering.

It's not my specialist subject, but I'm certain that there aren't enough high-interest accounts on the market to make anywhere close to 30 worthwhile. Probably the OP's parents don't have 30 accounts open right now and he means that something like 30 have been opened over the course of several years... but it still sounds like far too many for there to be any rational explanation.

For one person 30 current accounts is certainly looking suspicious and unrealistic, but the brother has 3 adults that he can open accounts for in this sad scenario, so 8 each and a few joint accounts thrown in and there is easily potential for earning interest from each one...

However, it does look like theft to me.

annandale

All your mother needs to do is contact the banks and all the credit card companies and ask for replacement cards. And with respect to them paying the interest but not the minimum as I said before if they weren't paying what they owed every month the credit card company would intervene.

Article50

Regardless of how many interest bearing accounts there are the rates will be minuscule compared to credit card interest rates. The credit cards must be the priority though I don't see how that much credit can be accrued without credit being declined somewhere even at £20 grand a card which is a high level for the income.

Even as you say your brother "will be done" with your parents he has nothing to bargain with, I recall he doesn't work therefore will not make any positive contribution,presumably pays no rent,keep etc so his presence in the house is worthless in addition to being a woeful apparent liability. The only one with anything to lose is your brother everyone especially your parents gain if he walks,call his bluff.