Money Moral Dilemma: Should I contribute to my grandfather's new garden?

tahrey

Snap reaction without knowing anything more about the situation or his health: Unless you have insider knowledge suggesting he's likely to pop his clogs in the next couple of years, do the right thing and open your wallet/purse.

My grandmother lived to 96, and whilst the dynamic was a little different as she owned her flat instead of renting, we happily got together and jazzed it up for her at least twice after her 80th, as well as making little fixes, additions and refreshes here and there in between, even up to the months just before her rather sudden and unexpected decline and passing-on.

No-one can say when the bell will actually toll, but if he manages to kicking the reaper in the backside for a similar period, and doesn't end up either in a care home (is he as fiercely independent as she was? ) or in a position where he can no longer afford the rent and has to move in with one of the family branches, then that's sixteen years he could have to enjoy the fruits of your labours and that significant capital investment gift. By that point it may well have got tatty enough that you'll have gone in for another mini refurb along the way anyhow to keep it looking reasonably attractive.

If you want to hedge your bets and be cheeky, you could maybe see if the council can grant a discount on the rent, at least for a while, considering the pro-bono maintenance you'll be doing for them and the value it should add to the property should they decide to sell it after he moves out instead of renting it out to someone else?

Three score years and ten isn't all you get any more, it's not unusual for people to live a long time past retirement if they are reasonably lucky on the genetic and environmental lottery, look after themselves, and get a bit of help from family and the NHS. Just because he's 80, that's no reason to be pessimistic and think he's going to die before the next olympics.

(OK, so my grandfathers didn't so so well, taking the average they barely broke 80, but one had long term congenital angina and the other a very high risk lifestyle in terms of diet, health damaging habits and level of exercise; other old relatives have been arrayed along a spectrum from about 75 to 95, so think lucky. You may be pleasantly surprised, and not just for the sake of the property. I can certainly say that the older YOU get, the more you appreciate having them around, and the more you miss them after they're gone.)

chesky

I wish my family would arrange a complete makeover for my garden.

iclayt

Thousands?! How much exactly are you being asked to chip in?
Granddad in law just turned 96 and still enjoys his garden and greenhouse. Don't be so miserable about him enjoying it, however long he has left.
But the suggested cost is admittedly ridiculous, depending on how many of you are expected to contribute.

Pollycat

gettingtheresometime wrote: »

My opinion on these mmd is that there's an element of real posts, if they haven't been lifted from real posts, in them.

I wish they'd stop posting them though....if I'm correct it's a lazy way of filling up these boards & it's pointless in posting them as no background or follow up info can be given in them.

These MMDs seem to bring a lot of newbies to the site.

ViolaLass wrote: »

Yes, if you want to. No, if you don't want to.

This ^^^^.
Although I'd probably dig my heels inat being asked to contribute a specific amount.

SheilaE

If it will give your Grand father a lot of enjoyment, then it will be worth while even if only for a couple of years. He might live in that property for another 10 years. Contribute as much as you can reasonably afford.

birtles1010

Have a good think about what you'd like as a present from your family for your 80th birthday - if he's got there then the odds are on that you'll get there as well mate - have a sensible discussion with the family, suggest the garden, suggest an estimate and suggest that someone come in to garden etc for 1h a week

Gissafreebe

When you get to 65 (ish) you retire and stop earning as such. Anything you buy from then on is essentially from savings or pension. You become reluctant in spending the money, there are loads of people who say they have to save savings for a rainy day. It is possible that the garden has become unmanageable and is his main enjoyment, (other than going down the pub because he is bored).

So if he enjoys his garden ... I can think of no better pressie as when you get to that age you probably have everything you need.

The mere fact that its a council house is a complete red herring.

So chip in you stingy git!

Gill141

Chances are it would be possible to purchase the house at a knock down price. Get your relatives to invest in this instead. No more rent payments for granddad and all will benefit.

silvercar

If grandad wanted a world cruise, you may happily chip in without any expectation of a return on your gift. Why is a garden than can be enjoyed for longer any different?

silvercar

Pollycat wrote: »

These MMDs seem to bring a lot of newbies to the site.

Possibly because they are flaunted around social media and the weekly email.