Write it out

Fusspot

Just wondering if anyone feels like I do, that it helps to write out your anger and/or upset when something is bothering you.

Starrystarrynight1

I've found it more useful to write down all the good things that happen in the day, and try to focus on those rather than negative experiences or problems. I guess, if you find that writing down things that bother you helps you to come up with ways to deal with them, then that has to be a good thing.

Geoff1963

I've heard of writing problems down, being recommended for those who have trouble sleeping. Think of it like setting an alarm clock, you don't have to wake yourself up in the morning, so you can then sleep easier.
Even if you aren't sleeping, writing it down can help ; because your conscious brain then feels it can "let go" ; like closing a window on a PC.

Freud ( I think it was ) drew an analogy to a disruptive person in a lecture. If you throw them out, they will bash on the door ; causing just as much disturbance, but being less obviously the cause of the distraction.
I think he was saying that if you try to ignore something which is bothering you ; it will continue to bother you, but you won't know why, and that is worse.
Writing it down might help you to take a psychological break, like leaving a half-made jigsaw is easier, if you know you can come back to it.

My coping mechanism with difficult situations, is to treat them as a technical exercise, a puzzle to be solved for my enjoyment. I expect that surgeons focus better when they concentrate on the plumbing and wiring, and less about it being a person on the end of the scalpel.

Writing it down to try and solve it might help, because then you can weigh good things against the bad.

I heard of a young man who went to a psychotherapist, because he had rejection anxiety, and could no longer find the courage to ask for a date.. The shrink gave him "homework" to get 100 rejections ( e.g. invite for coffee at a local cafe ) before the next session ; and every "failure" became a success, breaking the viscous cycle of negative reinforcement. Sometimes in life, we have to be our own shrinks.

Tigsteroonie

When I get narked at work, I write out the response that I want to send, so as to get it out of my system; and then delete that and write the response that I have to send

I've always been better at writing down my feelings than speaking them, so I understand where the OP is coming from on this.

maman

Fusspot wrote: »

Just wondering if anyone feels like I do, that it helps to write out your anger and/or upset when something is bothering you.

Isn't that exactly what many people use these boards for?:rotfl:

System

I like to write, but you need to find a 'safe space' to do so. For example a password-protected document on the computer, or a book that no-one's likely to look in, if you're going to write by hand.

Fusspot

Hi, thanks for your replies. Do you keep a journal as such? Do you keep your writing afterwards just out of interest?

Geoff1963

I often keep it, helps to remind me how I made the decisions I did.

Luna68

Fusspot wrote: »

Just wondering if anyone feels like I do, that it helps to write out your anger and/or upset when something is bothering you.

I have never thought of doing that
strange for me as i wrote a letter to my dad when he died telling him so much
i kept it next to his ashes an sent it with him when i scattered them.
do you mean like a Diary?
I do think it could be a good idea getting it all out of the head kind of a clean up exercise,.
Luna

System

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3996357

Fireflyaway

I have been thinking about trying this! Its good to get stuff off your chest and you don't always want to risk repercussions. Someone having a bad reaction to what you say or not keeping it confidential. I heard once about a man who accepted letters from people who had a worry or secret they wanted to share. I think maybe he was in the US but hi may be wrong. I don't think he ever replied and actually I think most letters were anonymous anyway. Its was just a way to help people unburden themselves.