who moves house?

Mojisola

grumpycat216 wrote: »

my reason is my son goes to a good school, my family help out every half term with childcare and pick my son up from school twice a week as i am working and it keeps the cost down for childcare.

they also take him to swimming lessons and badminton after school, my parents live about 15 mins away, all my friends are nearby and have children so we will sometimes pop over, i like having this kind of support network.

my partners reason for not wanting to move is he does not want to commute to his job for an hour every day and he bought a house a year ago. he has no family or friends in the city he is living in.

seashore22 wrote: »

Speaking personally, it's the fact that there's a child involved. The sex of the parent is irrelevant and I would say the same if the op was a man and the partner was a woman.

Agree with this.

While the support system is so important for the child, it wouldn't matter whether the child was living with mother or father, that would be a good reason not to move.

I wouldn't want to commute to work either and that's a good reason for staying put.

Living together just isn't on for the time being. Things might be different in a year or so. If the long-distance relationship doesn't survive that long, so be it.

Fireflyaway

I think you are right to stay put for your son. He and you need the support and he wont be young forever. Kids really benefit from stability and the support of extended family.
Don't rush to make a decision. If you are OK how you are carry on. Maybe your partner isn't ready to move in and the commute stuff is a handy excuse?

Tammykitty

We are married 5 years and neither of us has moved yet - living in the here and now.


Our respective jobs have kept us in our respective cities, but for now its working - we make the most of our time together.


See each other all weekend, lots of holidays and sometimes during the week.

Tammykitty

If you moved, would your Partner support you with your son - could you both work your hours so that one of you is available to collect your son from school, take him to activities etc?


What age is your son?

Geoff1963

Could your partner work some days from ( your ) home, or live away for the week - maybe renting out rooms in his house ?

Art_Deco

How long have you been seeing each other and how old is your son two important factors , if the relationship is in the early stages it would be foolish to move homes ,what would happen if you split up? Dont rush things never mind what other people expect of you

onomatopoeia99

FBaby wrote: »

So clearly he doesn't feel committed enough to you to want to give up what he has.

Nor does she, and she's playing the "my child..." trump card to dictate terms in the relationship already. That's a bad omen for the future.

heartbreak_star

krlyr wrote: »

Perhaps he's said? Would assume they've discussed friends and family in the course of dating..

seashore22 wrote: »

This is a very bemusing post.

Most couples talk to each other about stuff. I least I thought they did.

You'd be surprised. He can't have nobody at all. Maybe he's just told her he has? I dunno. I was just thinking that "I have no friends or family" would be an odd thing to say...

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

Nor does she, and she's playing the "my child..." trump card to dictate terms in the relationship already. That's a bad omen for the future.

Agree entirely.

HBS x

grumpycat216

My son is 9 years old.
My partners family dont live in this country and his friends live all over the uk just not in the city he lives in.
We havnt talked about it seriously like i said a friend was curious and asked us, as we have been together 3 years.

Spendless

grumpycat216 wrote: »

My son is 9 years old.
My partners family dont live in this country and his friends live all over the uk just not in the city he lives in.
We havnt talked about it seriously like i said a friend was curious and asked us, as we have been together 3 years.

Didn't this come up last year when your partner bought their house? Wouldn't that have been the time for any discussion about the future to have happened?