who moves house?

mintymoneysaver

Three years down the line, the 'where would we live' conversation has just begun to seem more real to us now. We're not that far away from each other, but both have houses with mortgages ( He was remortgaging which was how the conversation came about) We have the issue that my children are actually older (23 and 20) and his 16 year old stays half the week so currently not enough room in either house! We're happy as we are, and have agreed to think about it again in a while!

Oakdene

svain wrote: »

this is good advice.

My partner and i have been seeing each other for nearly 5 years and we still wont move to each others area. She has children to consider and i have my own business to consider. We both worried a bit about it in the second and third year together but this has passed and we will just see what happens. We are leaning towardto waiting for her kids to leaving education and in work (another 5years+) and we will review the situation again then.

Exactly you will put too much pressure worrying about who should be moving & when.... in the end you will forget to be a couple.

heartbreak_star

How do you know he has no friends in his area? *bemused*

HBS x

debtisnotme

If and when the time comes and you are still in the same situation then maybe it would be best that you both moved to a new area.

krlyr

heartbreak_star wrote: »

How do you know he has no friends in his area? *bemused*

HBS x

Perhaps he's said? Would assume they've discussed friends and family in the course of dating..

seashore22

heartbreak_star wrote: »

How do you know he has no friends in his area? *bemused*

HBS x

This is a very bemusing post.

Most couples talk to each other about stuff. I least I thought they did.

Marvel1

FBaby wrote: »

So clearly he doesn't feel committed enough to you to want to give up what he has.

Neither does she.

davidwood123

FBaby wrote: »

So clearly he doesn't feel committed enough to you to want to give up what he has. Maybe it's still too early to discuss moving in together or he isn't the right one.

Horrible man not wanting to leave his home and move in with the woman who won't move either.... but she shouldn't have to because she's a woman according to some :money:

seashore22

Speaking personally, it's the fact that there's a child involved. The sex of the parent is irrelevant and I would say the same if the op was a man and the partner was a woman.

Gavin83

seashore22 wrote: »

Speaking personally, it's the fact that there's a child involved. The sex of the parent is irrelevant and I would say the same if the op was a man and the partner was a woman.

I can totally understand that her child has to come first. For her. The child isn't his responsibility however so I can fully understand why he wouldn't wish to move based on this reason. He feels he has as much entitlement to stay where he is and there's nothing wrong with this opinion. As I said previously neither is right or wrong, it's just a disagreement they've reached.

Probably the 'fairest' thing would be if they both moved to a location roughly in the middle of where they are now but I've got a feeling the OP (and probably the partner) wouldn't accept this either. I also feel it's probably not the most practical solution either.

Where they go from here depends on how big a deal this is to them.

OP, how old is your child?