The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

VJsmum

UPDATE

Apparently older brother didn't tell me the full story - honestly, it would have been easier if i had sorted it; I am painfully honest and would have done everything by the letter of the law.

The will says that P gets 60% of everything and the remaining 40% to be split 4 ways. P can't afford to buy us out so we are going to have to force a sale - P will not want this. i feel better about this, as at least sister and youngest brother will get something after all.

Hester, i know what you mean - we are probably talking about £10k - £15k each. this is a fortune to my sister and younger brother. it is a lot of money for me and older brother too but adds to a pot, rather than being the pot..

we have done the same, left everything to each other and after that the children. i totally trust my OH to look after the children even if he were to marry again. Interestingly, when we wrote the wills the solicitor asked what should happen if all four of us went together. OH said he didn't really care what would happen if we made no provision - until he found out what would happen... At the time we wrote them, both children were under 18 - if we'd all gone in a plane crash or whatever, i would be deemed the inheritor of everything as i am younger than OH. If no provision were made EVERYTHING we owned, house, contents, savings etc would come to me and then to my next of kin. My next of kin after OH and kids are my oldest brother (who has distanced himself from the family and has nothing to do with us) and the older brother I am speaking of here (who is well off). OH's family would have got nothing and neither would my younger siblings (who are half siblings).. Needless to say, we made provision :rotfl:

In the living world, we don't always treat each child equally in terms of gifts - working on the basis that it probably evens out in the end. if one needed a laptop (for example) we wouldn't automatically spend the same on the other, on the basis that eventually that child too would need a laptop..

mardatha

Well after the last few days I'm going to make it my ambition to leave nothing because I'll have bloody well enjoyed spending it myself. Instead of being dead

greenbee

Too right Mar. Make the most of it.

I keep telling my mum to spend the money on getting the help she needs to be able to enjoy living where she is rather than worrying about how much work the house/garden takes as she doesn't want to move for a few more years. Mind you, getting reliable help can be difficult.

maryb

We redid our wills recently and didn't make too many changes because we sorted out who got what if we all went together when we made our wills after we got married. But this time instead of leaving things to siblings and siblings in law we decided to skip a generation and leave to the nephews and nieces in the event we all go together. Our in laws have all now decided that when they update their wills they will do the same

ivyleaf

My brother was the executor when our Dad died.

Dad's Will said simply "All to my wife."

silvasava

Mar - be a ski-er like me! Spending The Kids Inheritance
DH & I have mirror wills that leaves everything to each other and the one left standing passes it onto the kids (whatever's left!)

maryb

Our wills are identical but not formal mirror wills. But we trust each other and it's easier this way

MMF007

I have elderly friends and clients. 2 people have recently told me that they saved too much. They went without to save for their retirement but then never 'took the brakes off' and now find themselves widowed with plenty of money and poor health.
DH reminds me of this when I am reluctant to tap into our savings.
This is why we are working part-time (although DH is full time in summer) and have about 9 weeks off every year (mostly to visit family and friends during staycations but we try to take one holiday abroad each year ). We want to make the most of our time and our money.

We know we are lucky but some of the luck we made ourselves, studying while working, budgeting carefully, researching before making big financial decisions and, probably most crucially, staying in our tiny house and clearing the motgage rather than taking on a lot of debt.

I have willed everything to DH except any of mum's jewellery (after I die that will go to her only granddaughter, my brother's little girl). If DH goes first my estate will be split between my only sibling and one of DH's sisters (his other sister is a bad person and I won't even send her a xmas card).

monnagran

I've just had a nasty shock. Logged on to the Forum list, looked for the Garden Fence and couldn't find it. Then realised that the Doorstep was listed with the last post being March 2015. Further investigation showed that some entries were todays and the rest varied at any time in the last 3 or 4 years.

Went back and logged on again and there you were.

I must go and lie down.

nursemaggie

Same happened to me Monna.