Teacher told child she could wet herself

Guest101

pollyanna24 wrote: »

But it is. I can't make pre-teen girls or teenage girls be less embarrassed about talking to a male teacher by telling them they are being sexist.

Same as it is most likely easier for a pre-teen boy / teenage boy to speak to a male teacher about things in certain areas.

If that's sexist, then so be it.

The point being you should be telling your child that the gender of the teacher isn't relevant and that they are professionals who have dealt with this kind of thing before. Not making excuses and enabling sexist behaviour

Mrs_Ryan

louiseturner wrote: »

Not surprised he was furious, I would be too. I am sorry but unless they have a medical note then I don't let them out, and even then they still have to ask

At Both schools I went to a parental note overruled anything the teachers could do. I had a parental note, therefore I was allowed out. Btw this man was strange. He objected to the girls who had started their periods, and therefore developed breasts etc, being allowed out of class to change for PE and believed we should have no excuse to leave class! He had taught my sister previously and my dad hated him. However another girl's parent, who happened to be a governor, was also unhappy with his conduct so the head had to compromise.

BJV

Guest101 wrote: »

No, just a teacher who is in control of her classroom...

I would not home school as I am not qualified have not studied how to impart knowledge. You, I take it have? I have a good standard of education and worked hard in my chosen field.

I would hate to think that the day would come where I could not improve. Have nothing more to learn. Perhaps you do?

Looking at your answers it seems to be that the teacher should have complete control of his/her class room what ever the rules she/ he sets. No matter what???? MMMM not speak until spoken to. How very Victorian? Gosh next we will be sending the little blighters now the mine. Or perhaps whipping out the cane to ensure complete subservience.

I would expect my children's teachers to respect me as I respect them and treat them as such. I would expect that as school is a partnership where school and home have to work together to get the best for our young people we would respect each others roles.

If you are teacher then I am disappointed at your comment ref it is your honor to teach? I think teachers are the most important things in a school. A good teacher has the training, ability, authority and respect to be able to teach. To make a boring subject engaging. A bad teacher and I have had one or two I remember to this day can do the exact opposite.

It must be an amazing feeling to be able to do that. Knowledge is power and teachers are helping to shape the next generation.

How sad that if you are a teacher you so not see it that way.

Notice that you did not comment about a 15 year old me being humiliated so much so that I still remember today. Oh well not to worry it was all worth while if the teacher kept control of their class room! It was not worth it for me!

BJV

pollyanna24 wrote: »

I was referring to the fact that an 11 year old girl might find it more embarrassing if she had to mention it to a male teacher. Not that the male teacher would be embarrassed about it.

That might make it sexist, but it is what it is. An 11 year old girl is more like to want to talk to a woman about it, although I would imagine she wouldn't want to have to explain it at all!

Could not agree more .

My 11 year old would not want to talk to a male teacher. Not that she thinks that he would be embarrassed but she would.

My 14 year old son would equally find it embarrassing talking to a female teacher about an erection. Not sexism reality.

Funny I wondered when the sexism point would be raised.

" if you are loosing an argument pull out the ism??? "
Sexism, Racism, Ageism you name it. People are so frightened to be called an ism and honestly I am none that shy away.

How sad !!!!!

Strange I have just had to have some very personal medical tests the doctor and the hospital both times we proud to tell me that it would be done by female and lady doctors.

For safeguarding issues when children are a certain age in a charity I volunteered with, only same sex where allowed in changing rooms. This is because the young people who went said they felt less self conscious. MMM they must be sexist.

God are they sexist too!!! Who knew the NHS and now the educational systems where so sexist.

Guest101

BJV wrote: »

I would not home school as I am not qualified have not studied how to impart knowledge. - but you're qualified to tell a teacher how to teach? You, I take it have? I have a good standard of education and worked hard in my chosen field. - Ditto, which is why when the professionals make a rule and explain the logic, I accept their experience and expertise. I try to avoid telling a surgeon how to carry out a heart bypass, a pilot how to land a plane or a plumber how to fix my drains.

I would hate to think that the day would come where I could not improve. Have nothing more to learn. Perhaps you do? - more to learn, ofcourse. But my point, as above still stands. I would equally not expect the teacher to tell me how to do my job.

Looking at your answers it seems to be that the teacher should have complete control of his/her class room what ever the rules she/ he sets. No matter what???? - No. You're doing a typical thing and expanding a concise position. There is a rule, it is common and it should be followed. The rule is reasonable and not detrimental. MMMM not speak until spoken to. - Either quote me saying that or apologise. How very Victorian? Gosh next we will be sending the little blighters now the mine. Or perhaps whipping out the cane to ensure complete subservience. - Or setting reasonable expectation of standards and behaviour to avoid a repeat of the current generation, many of whom are unable to cope with the pressures of everyday life.

I would expect my children's teachers to respect me - why? anyone can give birth as I respect them and treat them as such - but if you did you would respect their decision. I would expect that as school is a partnership - it's not where school and home have to work together to get the best for our young people we would respect each others roles. - indeed, so you ensure your kids get enough sleep, eat healthy and do their homework, and when it comes to school, you step aside. Unless you'd like the teacher telling you how to parent?

If you are teacher then I am disappointed at your comment ref it is your honor to teach? - i'm not. and I haven't claimed to be. I think teachers are the most important things in a school. A good teacher has the training, ability, authority and respect to be able to teach. To make a boring subject engaging. A bad teacher and I have had one or two I remember to this day can do the exact opposite. - So you're calling the teacher a bad teacher or?

It must be an amazing feeling to be able to do that. Knowledge is power and teachers are helping to shape the next generation. - often their having to control what is otherwise a rabble of ill-mannered, self-centred, spoilt brats. Because little Johnny is just 'expressing himself'...

How sad that if you are a teacher you so not see it that way. - I have the utmost respect for teachers, and if my children ever complained about such a thing, I'd ensure that the next few weeks were used to remind them of the need to use the toilet when appropriate.

Notice that you did not comment about a 15 year old me being humiliated so much so that I still remember today. Oh well not to worry it was all worth while if the teacher kept control of their class room! It was not worth it for me!

I didn't comment because that's your personal experience. The fact that you did not get over it is not my business; nor is it relevant to the OP, because again I'm having to point out that there was no issue of periods in the OP.


It's no different to any other what if scenario.

BJV

jondav wrote: »

And if the child was younger I would completely agree, but we are talking about an eleven year old here.....soon to go to secondary school.....it is completely different.

At 11 years old, she knows (or should know) that if she has classes all afternoon, she should try for the loo during break time whether she needs it or not!

Do you want here to be treated like a baby for the rest of her life?

And whipped with a big stick if she or he needs one during lesson times. Problem solved :T

BJV

Guest101 wrote: »

I didn't comment because that's your personal experience. The fact that you did not get over it is not my business; nor is it relevant to the OP, because again I'm having to point out that there was no issue of periods in the OP.


It's no different to any other what if scenario.

Ok. There are rules and they should be flexible as we are dealing with people, human beings and we are all different.

Perhaps I am lucky but my children's local school advocate that education is a partnership. They want to be part of our community and they are. They are also very strict. Dress and behavior codes etc.

I do respect my children's teachers but if I disagree I will tell them. Privately not in public. Just like for ooh example when my daughter and her friends came home from school in tears because of the amount of pressure that the school was putting her under for the recent year 6 tests. Mass's of children going off sick, teachers screaming that they where all about to fail. Shouting that they would be letting the school down, disappointing their parents. ???? Really. ????

I am proud of my two and want them to reach their full potential no matter what that is.

I spoke to the teacher and she apologized. She spoke to the head teacher. They sent a letter home in fact to all parents. They said that the school is under a lot of pressure and that it had filtered down.

The point I make is that Teachers too are human they make good choices and bad. They make mistakes. They have good days and bad and can also feel pressure ? No one is perfect not me not you.

Guest101

BJV wrote: »

Ok. There are rules and they should be flexible as we are dealing with people, human beings and we are all different. - rules typically only apply to human beings....

Perhaps I am lucky but my children's local school advocate that education is a partnership. They want to be part of our community and they are. They are also very strict. Dress and behavior codes etc. - so you would be happy for a teacher to comment on your parenting?

I do respect my children's teachers but if I disagree I will tell them. Privately not in public. Just like for ooh example when my daughter and her friends came home from school in tears because of the amount of pressure that the school was putting her under for the recent year 6 tests. Mass's of children going off sick, teachers screaming that they where all about to fail. Shouting that they would be letting the school down, disappointing their parents. ???? Really. ???? - I suspect that is only partially true. Did you ask the teacher what happened?

I am proud of my two and want them to reach their full potential no matter what that is.

I spoke to the teacher and she apologized. She spoke to the head teacher. They sent a letter home in fact to all parents. They said that the school is under a lot of pressure and that it had filtered down. - because students were failing?

The point I make is that Teachers too are human they make good choices and bad. They make mistakes. They have good days and bad and can also feel pressure ? No one is perfect not me not you.

Absolutely, which is why we have policies and rules, so everyone knows where they stand...

Dutsey

What the hell am I reading here? my 9 year old and 7 year old have to wait until break time to go to the loo, so an 11 year old should be able to.

Sounds like parent has no respect for the teacher / rules.

BJV

Guest101 wrote: »

Absolutely, which is why we have policies and rules, so everyone knows where they stand...

Originally Posted by BJV View Post
Ok. There are rules and they should be flexible as we are dealing with people, human beings and we are all different. - rules typically only apply to human beings.... Not be be pedantic but no they don't rules can apply to lots of different things. From building control to gravity. There are rules.

Perhaps I am lucky but my children's local school advocate that education is a partnership. They want to be part of our community and they are. They are also very strict. Dress and behavior codes etc. - so you would be happy for a teacher to comment on your parenting? - It is not correct that teachers are trained to look out for signs of bad parenting. Don't they work with social workers already.?

I do respect my children's teachers but if I disagree I will tell them. Privately not in public. Just like for ooh example when my daughter and her friends came home from school in tears because of the amount of pressure that the school was putting her under for the recent year 6 tests. Mass's of children going off sick, teachers screaming that they where all about to fail. Shouting that they would be letting the school down, disappointing their parents. ???? Really. ???? - I suspect that is only partially true. Did you ask the teacher what happened? Yes I did at parents evening. Her bottom lip got very wobbly and she said she was sorry and that she had been under a lot of pressure. It happens we all make mistakes. She had the grace and the nerve to to say sorry. If i had never made a mistake? We all make them. All good now.

I am proud of my two and want them to reach their full potential no matter what that is.

I spoke to the teacher and she apologized. She spoke to the head teacher. They sent a letter home in fact to all parents. They said that the school is under a lot of pressure and that it had filtered down. - because students were failing? TBH I don't think so. The school has excellent results and outstanding reputation within the area. But teachers are now under so much pressure to ensure that the results are among the best in the area. It has to come out somewhere??? I actually felt so sorry for her. She is a good teacher, nice person and made a mistake and had the good grace to admit it.

The point I make is that Teachers too are human they make good choices and bad. They make mistakes. They have good days and bad and can also feel pressure ? No one is perfect not me not you.

I think ultimately we will never agree and that is ok. You are entitled to your view as I am mine. You will raise your children as you believe to be the best way and I mine.