The Nice People Thread, No.16: A Universe of Niceness.

silvercar

Number of viewings

Boosted by us nosy lot!

James and his partner have now been given a firm move in date to their new (and first home together) apartment. They get the keys on Tuesday cue much excitement and a small stab of mum emotion from me as realisation hits that one of my 'babies' is now a fully fledged adult with a significant other and baby plans.

I didn't pick up that there was a significant other. Very scarey when they grow up. Even DS1 can't believe how adult DS2 is living with his GF.

PasturesNew

Pyxis wrote: »

Pastures, if you have other nets, depending on the pattern, you may be able to cut one to size by cutting along a suitable part of the pattern, to shorten it, Like a sort of scalloped edge but going by the pattern instead.

The width can be reduced easily.

A dab of glue will sort any rough edges!

No viewers will look that closely at a net curtain.


You could even use nets in a similar way for the kitchen spaces!

I've got other nets, packed away ... but I don't like cutting up perfectly good things ... I've kept every net I've ever bought for all my rods, "in case they come in handy"....

I did think about cutting them... but couldn't bear to "wreck" something "as good as new" for the purpose.

Or get a large cardboard box and paint it to look like an appliance! You could even go to Curry's and ask if they've got a washing machine etc. box going begging... you know.... the ones with a design of a machine on the front!

You do know you're bonkers... right?

Pyxis

SingleSue wrote: »

James and his partner have now been given a firm move in date to their new (and first home together) apartment. They get the keys on Tuesday cue much excitement and a small stab of mum emotion from me as realisation hits that one of my 'babies' is now a fully fledged adult with a significant other and baby plans.

I'm going to have plenty of time to get to know her a bit better on Sunday as she is doing the driving for dropping Joe off in Lincoln and Joe insists I go to in case he needs me (I think it was also a handy excuse for James and partner to have a day out and for James to check out Joe's halls and uni)

In other news, we as a family have a big decision to make. Dad has been offered an operation but the risks are high, so high the surgeon is advising family discussions. If he doesn't have the operation he is a ticking time bomb with a possible 18 month to 2 year life expectancy but if he does have it, the risks of him dying during or immediately after or suffering major damage are also very high. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't scenario.

Sue, I suppose a lot depends on how better would he be if the op were a success? If the answer is, not much better, but he might get an extra year out of it, it might not be worth it. If the answer is, a lot better and many more years, then it might be worth it.

GDB2222

Pyxis wrote: »

Sue, I suppose a lot depends on how better would he be if the op were a success? If the answer is, not much better, but he might get an extra year out of it, it might not be worth it. If the answer is, a lot better and many more years, then it might be worth it.

If I were Dad, I might want to get it over with, rather than having the sword of Damocles hanging over me. But that might not be the best decision from the point of view of the rest of the family. Do try to understand if Dad takes a decision you don't agree with.

SingleSue

We've said that ultimately, it is up to dad as it is his body. When the operation was first talked about just after his first strokes, I was very against the idea due to the risks, now I am on the fence. As it was, back then the risks outweighed the potential benefits and the operation was taken off the table as an option.

Mum is going between not wanting him to have it and wanting him to have it.

It really is a damned if you do, damned if you don't decision. With the op he COULD die, either on the table or shortly after (a high risk of it too) or suffer a catastrophic stroke, without it he WILL die or suffer a catastrophic stroke at some point in the next 18 months to two years. Which ever way the decision goes, we will always be questioning if it was the right one if something does happen.

The odds on a successful outcome are not great for either option.

Pyxis

What a truly horrible position to be in.

PasturesNew

One question that came from nowhere was a very direct "Resuscitation. Have you ever had a discussion about resuscitation decisions?"

The question came from nowhere - and suddenly you realise that no, you've never had that discussion .... and now you're pretty much having to give your input/choice about what to do!!

One of those conversations nobody wants to have, or start, because we're all going to live forever aren't we... and it's awkward.... and nobody wants to start the discussion... because that's something the other person should start....

Most people never have the actual, proper, discussion. If there is a sudden event where they need to all work on a patient, with all the teams and machines beeping to "bring them back" ..... do you want them to?

Hard one, eh.

silvercar

PasturesNew wrote: »

One question that came from nowhere was a very direct "Resuscitation. Have you ever had a discussion about resuscitation decisions?"

The question came from nowhere - and suddenly you realise that no, you've never had that discussion .... and now you're pretty much having to give your input/choice about what to do!!

One of those conversations nobody wants to have, or start, because we're all going to live forever aren't we... and it's awkward.... and nobody wants to start the discussion... because that's something the other person should start....

Most people never have the actual, proper, discussion. If there is a sudden event where they need to all work on a patient, with all the teams and machines beeping to "bring them back" ..... do you want them to?

Hard one, eh.

Had that discussion when my parent was terminally ill. But the medical staff led us to their conclusion rather than asking us for our opinion and they didn't involve the patient only the family, which I found rather odd.

michaels

I would leave the kitchen gaps empty or possibly put something like a vegetable rack in them. Curtaining them off sounds too like 'funny little old lady' to me.

Our bathroom window is like PNs in opening but is frosted so it doesn't really matter how dirty or not the outside is.

Pyxis

silvercar wrote: »

Had that discussion when my parent was terminally ill. But the medical staff led us to their conclusion rather than asking us for our opinion and they didn't involve the patient only the family, which I found rather odd.

That seems a bit worrying.


One thing that worried me when I was in a similar position regarding a parent was the implication that we were only having the discussion due to the parent's age.