being accused!!

paddedjohn

Is this neighbour the reason you and your husband split up? Is he still with her?

loulout

sorry, please let me clarify (I suffer with anxiety so sometimes I forget details)

My ex-h is not seeing the neighbour, never was. I was friends with the neighbour for over a year, quite good friends really. She fell out with me because I kept asking her to keep the noise down (she is exceptionally loud, always yelling and banging) and because I asked her not to throw her cat's mess into my garden (I saw her do this!). As a result, she started doing things to annoy me, like turning up music full blast at my kids' bedtime, yelling all night to wake up my baby and then laughing in my face when I asked her to stop, petty things at first.

Then she called the police saying I was being beaten and thrown down the stairs. The police attended but said they had to automatically refer it to social services irrespective of what I said. So social came round, saw everything was fine and it was malicious, but said they had to investigate which involved speaking to the school and the stigma that involves!

There were other reasons for me splitting with DH but these were workable, until the stress the ex-neighbour put on us took its toll on our daily life and our childrens'.

The debts are not yet paid off, as we have a joint DMP we were looking at seperating that but Stepchange advised us to make full & final offers instead, so as far as I know, my ex-H is still waiting to sort that out. In the mean time, he plans to rent or buy his own place and is staying between his family and friend. He says he also needs the money to do things like buy stuff for the new place (I took everything) and a car as he's not allowed to use the van for personal use, so he can't take the kids out or anything.

The school had him as ICE for our eldest (youngest not at school) every year until last year when they sent out the forms to be signed. The address they had for him was the marital home which was sold. He doesn't attend many events due to work anyway, but he does come to parents' evenings. He never collects our child either alone or with me. It's always me who collects and drops off. If I'm not able, he still doesn't do it because my best friend does.

I've made an appointment with a solicitor today to see about a restraining order, as the neighbour is constantly texting me and slating me on her facebook to others, saying things that are just not true.

loulout

to give you an idea of the stress it put on us, we lived constantly checking who was around before entering/leaving our house (very difficult as we did school runs at the same time!) because if we saw her or her partner, she'd yell and swear and push past us (shared path from houses to street) even though the kids and her kids were there.

My eldest was playing in the garden and next door's child had a friend over. No problems for a while then my eldest overheard the neighbour saying to the child "oh dont worry thats just a nasty neighbour" which upset my child. When the neghbour heard my child tell me, she threw cat poo over the hedge! This is a 40 year old woman talking to a child and doing this!! She would also put nails in front of my car's tyres, she keyed my car, put cat poo on the door step, I could go on!

Aced2016

Well if that's the case I would get a restraining order on her. Block her and her friends from social media.

You said you wanted to move, so do that and don't give your address out. Change your mobile no and cut her right out, if she doesn't know your address, no or social media she can't contact you. Regardless of whether you were or were not committing benefit fraud this woman is getting way to involved and really has no need to.

If your child is at her child's school I would think about moving area all together.

Out of sight out of mind !!

FBaby

That still doesnt explained why you would continue to have a joint account though.

RuthnJasper

OP - is it just you who is on the receiving end of her behaviour, or are there others? I ask because you mention that her child had a friend over. If the woman is this deranged I'd be concerned for children left in her care.
What sort of feedback does she get on her FB rants?


I hope things get better for you soon.

loulout

my child is at a different school to hers, though I would leave at the same time as her (although I tried not to) and we'd get back at the same time.

We have a lot of joint accounts/debt, the accounts are no longer used or able to be used, but they exist until the debt is cleared

marliepanda

loulout wrote: »

my child is at a different school to hers, though I would leave at the same time as her (although I tried not to) and we'd get back at the same time.

We have a lot of joint accounts/debt, the accounts are no longer used or able to be used, but they exist until the debt is cleared

But he kept 40k to clear the debts...

That is a good explanation for the DWP as to why you don't have the money,,, but it's not true.

konark

She's probably just bluffing,; if I was going to dob someone into the DWP I wouldn't be telling them so they can take revenge when their benefit gets stopped.

Rainbowgirl84

loulout wrote: »

my child is at a different school to hers, though I would leave at the same time as her (although I tried not to) and we'd get back at the same time.

We have a lot of joint accounts/debt, the accounts are no longer used or able to be used, but they exist until the debt is cleared

Why has the debt not been cleared if he has 40k?