Starting again at 27!

Jacko_amz

Hi Everyone,


Some of you may remember I started a diary a few months ago called '6 years to a better future'. Well my life has gone completely pete tong and now i am having to completely start over!


Bit of a history:
I am 27 and recently just left a very turbulent relationship which lasted 3 years, a lot of verbal and physical abuse. This has meant that I have had to find new rented accomodation which allows pets. I have found somewhere and am moving at the end of the month so thats all sorted


However, i was doing really well on the CC dept repayment front (having got down to a balance of 1k) but am having to put on just under £1500 in moving costs/new appliances etc.


I am a avid user of a spreadsheet and calculating all new bills/living costs now i am on my own. Here is my totals so far:


Household bills (inc rent) 750
petrol 100
food 100
car (finance) 160
CC 100
mobile phone 10
All comes to 1220 (i think i may have missed something off but will check when i get home from work!)
I get paid a monthly wage of around 1650 so i will have quite a bit 'spare'.


My aim is to put more towards the CC and get that back down again. I really don't want a car on finance anymore, so i will probably buy the rest of my car when it comes to the end of the finance deal which is April 18.


At the moment i can't even think of entering a new relationship however i am worried that my clock is 'ticking' and i would really like to have a family etc and settle down. I would like to take a year at the latest to get used to being alone and doing some personal 'growth' (cringe!) but i definately need it as that relationship really ruined my self esteem and confidence!


To make a little bit more cash i have tried selling a few household bits, I have a sofa in the conservatory which i put on FB and gumtree for 50 but no one seems to want it! which i find really strange, its in great condition just needs the covers washing! gonna have to go lower i think a couple of wall canvas which i put for a tenner each (25 cost new from next) haven't sold either!. I see some right tat being sold and i think why aren't mine selling haha!


Sorry for the ramblings! I will update soon

Jacko_amz

Also now that i am single i need to be careful of not spending to much to fill the void! this month as its only been a couple of weeks since the split i have bought new clothes to pick my self up again. I know its ok to do but i need to be strict in the future and not go overboard!

Jacko_amz

Well today has been a bit of a roller coaster of emotions. ex OH moved out his stuff today whilst i was at work, so came home to quite an empty house. I think i am going through the break up stage that is 'panic' i'm going to be alone forever and perhaps i should try and get back with ex.

However, i need to think sensible and that actually it really wasn't healthy. He angered me anyway because he took my favourite mugs!! just to pee me off!

felt i needed to buy a chinese to drown my sorrows haha!

Pay day is friday - hip-hooray it feels like its been forever! Whilst setting up all my new bills of new house its costing a fortune in 'set up' fees etc which unfortunately is all going on the CC. I think once i'm all set up it should be around 2.5k.

As soon as i am settled i can start chunking that off, i have allocated 200 a month to CC payments and hoping to throw any little extra at it by selling things on ebay/gumtree etc.

Any tips for enjoying singledom and loneliness?

A x

Whoknowskt89

Hi!

Im 27 and single too.
Honestly, best thing to do is have a laugh with your friends or if you are feeling alone jump on here or another forum and find someone you can have a natter with.
I really enjoy dressmaking (very new hobby) and that keeps me busy and not thinking that it's just me and my cats.

Remember you are still allowed to have a night out with the girls (or guys) and that can do wonders for lifting your mood. Even if it's a quick drink and a laugh over someone playing pool badly or watching a film over a friends with a bottle of wine.

Good luck to you, you'll get there

Jacko_amz

Thanks Whoknows!

I am quite looking forward to being independant and doing it all on my own, not that i was dependent on ex OH but its all going to be my way!

I am looking forward to getting back in to reading which i don't do enough. dressmaking sounds fab!! i wish i was creative like that! Do you have a diary whoknows?

Whoknowskt89

No more going to the fridge for the last bar of chocolate and finding it gone!
No more arguments over cleaning or putting things away it will all be how you leave it and want it.
I can't say I'm that creative and so far everything is fairly basic but a cheap sewing machine and using cheap fabric or getting remnants from shops can really make the weekend zoom by.

I do, it's fairly new - small loan but want it gone!

ada-or-ardor

Just think, it may not be what you want forever but being single and lonely must be better than putting up with verbal and physical abuse with a grown man who stole your favourite mugs out of spite!!!

So I would say enjoy your new life that is all yours, walk around naked, play your favourite music as loud as you like and flirt with cute men in bars when youre ready ;-)

Ada

ada-or-ardor

I should emphasise, if walking around your NEW PLACE naked, put some clothes on before you go and flirt with cute boys. Should have sense-checked my message before hitting post!!!!

Bobarella

Good luck with your new life. Scary I'm sure at the moment. But who knows what's next.

zippygeorgeandben

Try telling my sister at 40 that your clock is ticking at 27. You have years ahead of you! Don't force yourself into a relationship just because that's what society expects of you!
Continue to walk around naked.

Jacko_amz

haha seems walking around naked is a theme here! can't say i could do it though, can't even sleep naked (shudders at the thought).

I have had a NSD today which is good however just sorted new energy tariff for new place and they are wanting £81 a month!! i used to pay £61 for a 3 bed detached and 2 adults, i am moving to a 1 bed bungalow and just me!! i know this will go down though so not getting to hung up on it.

Hoping to have NSDS most this week have been taking pack ups for lunch at work so that keeps me from buying £3 meal deals.

I just want to be settled in my new place now, i hate waiting lol so impatient. Then my new journey can really begin!