Debt Demolisher

motivated

Hi again debtaghh

what am I like eh.   

Thank you and I hope you are well and plodding along nicely
x

debtaghh

I think my teaspoon broke and I had a lot of rain in my lake. All we can do is try x

Moneywhizz

Sounds like you have been going through a difficult time and just got overwhelmed with everything. You should take things slowly and look at the big picture here and decide what is the best way forward for you. Maybe bankruptcy would be best for you? Of course it depends on what you have to lose, especially if you own your own home.  If that is not a road you want to go down, you need to look at how long it is going to take to pay off your debt and work out a realistic payment plan and budget. When it is a long journey, you really need to think about  setting your payments at a level that won't leave you scrimping every month to make ends meet. It may take longer than you would like to pay off the debt but realistically it is very difficult to stay motivated when all your spare money goes to debt and there is nothing left for you to enjoy some, even if they are small, pleasures. Having seen how well you were managing before, I have no doubt that you will be able to get on top of this again. Just take your time and make sure you have made the best decision for you.

motivated

Thankyou so much moneywhizz 
you are so right about all spare cash being eaten up and I think that's what makes hit so hard to maintain.  

Anyway I've heard back from most creditors already and all so far have been so understanding.  Only one wanted a DMP reference number so I emailed back our NEDCAB number.   Within minutes they wrote back and said they have suspended the accounts, interest and calls etc.  Phew!
As for the time frame I'm trying not to look at the bigger picture and want to focus on one debt at a time.   Knock off any smaller ones and snowball them all in a sense. 

Chatting with DH this afternoon which ended in tears I have to say.  No arguing or anything I think it was just the relief that we've had another lightbulb moment and the realisation hit me. He just looked at me and said "look we made this mess together we'll clear it up together" 

I've also started a cash pot at home for things like bread and milk during the week. It has a whopping £7.00 in it so far lol.  I plan to sit tonight and write every penny I have to pay out on Wednesday and work on a realistic budget.   I tend to forget about the little top up shops and extra petrol etc and just buy it without budgeting for it.  

I must brush myself off and organise things like I did at the beginning. Self pity is not a good thing and it brings my mood down.  

Thankyou all so much for the support and advice I will have positive thoughts from now on
x

motivated

Morning diary world
the sun is shining today in more ways than one  .   Slept very well last night after my organising things yesterday.  Have been out this morning and posted hand written letters to creditors, even though I have had responses online.  It just gives me a paper trail as I've stated I would like everything in writing.  

Have also written down everything I need to pay out on Wednesday. It doesn't leave me a lot left over but it will keep the wolf from the door so to speak. 

I actually feel like I'm just starting out again and this is the beginning of my long journey.  But it feels ok and the sense of relief is brilliant.  Still not looking at the huge lake I have to empty with my teaspoon, I'm focusing on one puddle at a time.  Yes we've taken 10 steps back but we are now on track to start heading in the right direction.  

Usually on a Saturday I would be waiting to go out grocery shopping, not today.  We have enough stores to keep us going and I am going to write a shopping list for only what we need and go on Wednesday with cash.  Also would usually think oh it's Saturday let's have a takeaway then £20 later ...    not today have lots in the freezer to cook. 

Also will be going through the bank account in a while and setting up SOs to go to our different savings pots.  Car, Christmas (this will be a cheap one this year but hey ho). Emergency fund and bills.
it won't be massive amounts but the pots are looking very dire at the moment. 

Plan to do housework then potter around the garden and read a book to relax. 

Hoping and praying that this all comes together,  done it before we can do it again. 

Have a lovely weekend all
M
x

Cherryfudge

Hi Motivated,
Sorry I missed you coming back but it's lovely to see you! It does sound like a tough time, has your husband heard any more about going back to work? And are you working from home? It sounds as though you have a strong relationship and will get through this together.
Well done on getting your plan up and running. Please keep on coming back to update, partly so we can cheerlead/offer sustenance/take turns with the teaspoon, and partly to keep yourself on track.
Have a (socially distanced) hug from me (where's the old dodgy group hug when needed?) and a virtual cake and cuppa - oh look, Dh has been baking and there's chocolate fudge cake or Victoria Sponge - what will you have?

motivated

Hi Cherryfudge 

thanks for popping in and for the lovely words of encouragement.  Thanks for the socially distanced hug too  .  Victoria sponge would go down a treat.  I'll sit in the garden with tea and cake and enjoy the peace and quiet.  Thank you 

DH is back at work and out of my hair lol and yes I'm working from home.   Will be back in September.    I have been revamping the garden and have come up with some good ideas for free.  I've used old wood and pallets as planters and old pots that have been stashed behind the shed to brighten up the garden.  Planted seeds instead of buying plants and they have all grown  .  It's been nice to spend some quality time at home and it helps give me a positive mind.  

Things are doing ok here financially (well in a sense) I've stayed organised and set up SOs to go between savings pots on paydays.  Have spoken to all creditors who have been great and very supportive.  Keeping them up to date with our situation stops them from hounding us and to be honest they've all been great. 

Actually looking forward to DHs payday next week to see the savings pots growing again.

thanks for all the positive vibes all
have a lovely day
x  

Cherryfudge

There's another slice if you can manage it?
Great to hear your husband's back at work and you can work from home. I expect the working from home has stresses of its own but apparently it's good for health (people are moving about more, stressing less, climbing more stairs etc.).
The progress in the garden sounds great! Isn't it amazing what we can do when we don't just head to the garden centre? My eldest has made some lovely planters out of an old bench he dismantled: if he ever wanted a career change I think he could do it for a living! And of course they add to the look of the garden. Well done on all the seeds coming up: mine are a bit sparse, I don't know why.
I'm very impressed that you have savings pots going on while emptying the lake - it's the right way to go, I'm sure as it's a buffer against the future. Keep up the good work!
And have a nice relaxed day

Cherryfudge

Just wondering how you are doing, @motivated ? I've not seen you around for a while. How is the second lockdown treating you?

motivated

Hi Cherry
im so sorry I didn't reply. I haven't had the balls to even log in if I'm honest.  

Things have just gone backwards and to say I stuck my head in the sand is an understatement.   

Hubby lost his job and our finances took a nosedive.  I know it's not only us but it feels like it.  He has a new job now but the wages are a lot lower, weekly paid too  so this adds to the situation and I'm finding it hard to budget properly again. 

.  It currently feels like my teaspoon has morphed into a tiny measuring spoon like you'd use if you needed a pinch of salt. Back at square one AGAIN!!
 I shouldn't have hid from it all you'd think I'd learnt that by now.  

At least we have our health under the current circumstances so a bonus there I suppose. 

Will stick around and try to find my mojo again. 

Sorry for the moan.  Hope you had a lovely christmas
x