Should I buy a house with my mother?

ambitiouspanda

I am saving towards a mortgage but the house I grew up in hasn't been bought by my mother or father. It's a 3 bedroom home, 2 bathrooms, front and back garden and with a garage. The house is huge and it's in Greater London.

Issue is my mother is a headache at times and me buying the house with her would be for me and my three other siblings 1 who doesn't want to contribute and two others who arent necessarily in the position to help (final year uni/a levels).

I think buying the house of the council would be great as they offered and have a scheme for people who've stayed in the property 15+ years.

I think it would be good, a few renovations, turn the garage into a new bedroom etc.

What do think? My concern is the personal relationship risk etc... But it's a great opportunity to jump into the property ladder..

Any thoughts?

marliepanda

Do you want to be stuck with your mother for the rest of her life?

Do you want to be stuck with a sibling for as long as they want whilst your mum is still about?

Also why should they contribute to YOUR house? I'm guessing that Mum lives cheaply enough to support four children...

You're not the first person to think 'ooooh a nice discount, I'll have that!'

csgohan4

Be careful about going down this route, what if you meet someone and want a place for yourself??? You will pay extra stamp duty and find it difficult to find a mortgage as you are already paying one.


Money and family shouldn't mix, what is the main intention to buying? your mother already has a secured tenancy I presume with the council. If it is for the RTB, who will benefit when the house is sold?

You will be responsible for all Maintenance costs if you buy the house, can you afford to swallow the cost of a boiler or re roofing or service charges if applicable?

Is it fair your siblings will benefit from this as assuming you and your mother buy it. Certainly not your share perhaps.

MyOnlyPost

I refused to buy a house with my mother on the grounds of "what if she died and I was left saddled with my father as a partner" and this wasn't her own home but a BTL prospect. This I think tells you all you need to know about mixing family and business

itchyfeet123

ambitiouspanda wrote: »

Issue is my mother is a headache at times ...

This alone is enough reason to nix this plan. If you co-own a property, or own the property in which she lives, the headaches will be so, so much worse.

Pixie5740

So your mum has been downgraded from toxic to a headache. That's progress.

If it is your parents who have the right to buy then you'll need to buy with them. Can you afford to buy in London even with a whopping big discount. Will you be able to get a mortgage with your parents? If the answer to both those questions is yes then you could get a foot on the hosing ladder but for how long? You'll probably be stuck on that rung with your "headache" mother until one of you dies.

elsien

Also from all the rights and wrongs ref selling off social housing, I'm guessing your mum will still consider it her house. So she will still want to make all the decisions about decor, maintenance, how it's used.
Can you live with that?
My mother and I have a good relationship, but we couldn't live together without certain clearly defined boundaries. You're not going to have those because it's already mum's house and the rules are already in place.
You have to think about absolutely everything that could change, including you wanting to move to the other side of the country and work out how that would happen. How would you/your mum feel if one of you needed to force a sale because you need the money for something else? . If you can't answer properly, don't do it.

sparky130a

ambitiouspanda wrote: »

What do think? My concern is the personal relationship risk etc... But it's a great opportunity to jump into the property ladder..

Any thoughts?

Wherever do i start.......

armchaireconomist

I think your mother has lived as a council tenant for so long quite frankly leave her to it, the only person going to benefit from this is you. And to stop speaking so disrespectfully about her.

TBagpuss

Does your Mum want to buy her house, and to have the responsibility of meaintrenace etc?

Would you plan to live there with her?

If you want to go ahead, then I would say that you would need to investigate whether the house can be put into your joint names ion purchase if she is the sole tenant, or whether you would have to be added to the tenancy first.

If you can buy with her, the you would need to work out what your joint mortgage capacity would be (bearing in mind that she will have to be on the mortgage with you, and that her age may limit the length of the mortgage)

If you do go ahead, then you need to ensure that you have a formal ded of trust which defines what share each f you has in the property, and I would strongly recommend that it should also include crystal clear provisions setting out how you or your mum can extract your money from he property, i.e. when and in what circumstnaces either of you can force a sale, but also how responsibility for maintenace and upkeep is to be shared and how any disputes are to be resovled.

I would suggest that you have a separate house sharing agreement dealing with practicalities such as bills, arrangments should either of you want to move a new partner in etc.

As your siblings are not in a position to contribute at presetn I would leave them out - encourage your mum to make a will dealing with her hare of the property.

However, I would be very wary of this arrangment. Regardless of the legal position, if this has ben your mum's home for 15+ years she is likely to continue to see it as 'hers' regardless of whether you vbecome a part owner.She may find it very hard to see you, and treat you, as an equal owner. If / When you want to move on and get somewhere of your won you may be faced with the prospect of having to force a slae and throw your mum out of her home. Even if her share of the property is enough, at that time, for her to buy a smaller property outright she may not like it, and if you are perceived as the "greedy child who threw mum out of her home" it could permanently damage your relationship with her and with your other siblings.

If you got to a point where you were considering buying elsewhere and selling your share of mum's house to a sibling, or remortagaging to raise a deposit you would be caught by the extra SDLT for second homes, and you would also be excluding yourself from the various schemes for first time buyers.

And all of that is before we even get started on the ethical issues!

If you do decide to do it, do your reseach first and make sure you have very cleara, detailed and legally binding agreements in place. treat it as you would a business transaction, don't rely of word of maouth of famikly discussions. hopefuly, you will never need your written agreement, but if you do, you will really need it. (also, to have an agreement means you and your mum need to discusss the possibilities and the 'worst case scearios' now, and make sure that you are on the same page. If you find that you have different expectations about how this would ork, walk away.

bmthmark

This is a recipe for disaster