I’m taking control of my life, now.

boxofpaws

Hello everyone, I hope everyone has had a good break.

@EssexHebridean, the little tokens were much appreciated, money well spend

@savingholmes, I think we all feel a little like things are different this year, for all sorts of reasons.

I haven't posted much but still MSE-ing. And I have been reading diaries. Well, just one diary actually so a bit of catching up to do on everyone else's.

I started reading Sun Addicts diary. I read somewhere that her husband had a brain tumour, so thought I would see if I could learn anything. I have read her first diary in its entirety, the illness, the axing of the carer, his seemingly endless thirst for coffee, the awful scooter accident. I realised there are no similarities between Sun Addict and me. Her husband is a lot iller than mine and she, frankly, she is twice the woman I am! I am not sure how she does what she does. I am only up to 2018 but I can't imagine she has slowed down.

Anyway, you are all incredibly inspirational but Sun Addict's diary in particular is making me rethink how I am tackling our situation. I am going to start trying to emulate some of the things she does.

I am going to start with soup.

savingholmes

Glad you found something that helped. Don't be hard on yourself though - you are doing amazingly well too. 

boxofpaws

Good Things

• Had a nice Christmas. It would have been better with Dad, of course, but we made the best of it.
• Bitten the bullet, because I realise there was no other way of avoiding paying interest, I have applied for a 0% zero transfer fee credit card and I’ve been accepted. I’ll use this to clear the overdraft and cc, and pay for the car repairs (see bad things)
• Have applied for a cash back credit card for groceries and fuel
• Have changed bank details for salary. I’m going to rearrange the finances a little. More later

Bad Things

• Have overspent a lot on food over Christmas. I don’t know how because we haven’t wasted anything, I even used up all the leftover turkey
• Still haven’t had my booster
• Car oil leak has suddenly got a lot worse. It’s been off the road now since before Christmas. I’ve been putting it off for ages - oil cooler seals have gone. Apparently this is a common fault on my type of car. The actual seals cost about £40, getting to them is very expensive. It’s nine hours work, £1000 or more. 
• Because of Christmas the overdraft hasn’t gone down, nor has the credit card. The better news is that they haven’t really got worse.

savingholmes

Ouch to the car bills. Pleased you managed to get a 0% card. If you get one that allows 0% spending as well as transfers you could pay for your car repair with it and avoid a transfer fee

Drawingaline

Car repairs are the worst. Always so much money and always at awful times. I used to joke that my car was linked to the bank and the minute I thought, hey this month is looking pretty ok, then bam, car broke 🙄

boxofpaws

savingholmes said:

Ouch to the car bills. Pleased you managed to get a 0% card. If you get one that allows 0% spending as well as transfers you could pay for your car repair with it and avoid a transfer fee

By some miracle it’s a transfer fee free card. Don’t really get what’s in it for the bank really.

Still dithering about it. Husband is quite stressed about the overdraft, and I like it this way, it stops the constant nagging to go out, which we can’t afford. Once he can’t see it (the overdraft, I mean) it won’t be a problem to him anymore.

Drawingaline said:

Car repairs are the worst. Always so much money and always at awful times. I used to joke that my car was linked to the bank and the minute I thought, hey this month is looking pretty ok, then bam, car broke 🙄

They can’t even tell me how much it will be - waaah! If the car can see the bank, she’s doing this because she hates me. 

boxofpaws

I have been mulling over money management for a couple of weeks I decided to do things a little bit differently in 2022. I’ve always had my wages paid into the joint account, and husband puts in what he can afford, which means that it’s pretty much always me that finds any shortfall or, as we have seen recently, manages the debt. 

What I’m going to do this year is have my wages paid into my own account and then we will both put an agreed amount into the joint account which will cover all the bills, the mortgage and an expense credit card which will cover groceries and petrol. I’ve already applied for a cashback credit card this and I’m going to get an extra card so we both have one. 

Then if either of us want to spend money on something else, like going out or a takeaway or stuff for the house or holidays, then it comes out of our personal account. So if the husband suggests that we go out, then it will be him taking me out with his money.

I’ll get my bonus in March. Every single year, I’ve used this bonus to square up an overdraft or a credit card. One day, I want to spend it on something fun.

boxofpaws

Spends

3rd Jan £40.33 - groceries

4th Jan £10 on shampoo and conditioner, so counting as groceries
£37 make-up but there were excellent offers in b00ts no7 so I got 2 foundations, 2 eyeshadows and 2 eyeliners for that price. 
8th Jan £53.71 groceries
also takeaway on Friday night although husband paid out of his money. I’d had my booster and didn’t have the energy to cook
I’m doing the grocery challenge. I’m aiming for £320. We spend £400 fairly consistently so this would be a big improvement.

girlatplay

Best thing I ever did was got rid of my overdraft.  Each month I would get paid, the bills would come out and I was left with just the overdraft which I used fully every month.  When I was dragging myself back from the depths I paid it off and got rid.  Now the money in the account is all mine.  I do check it every day for any unexpected surprises but there should never be any as the account is only used for bills and I leave the correct amount in there.  Admittedly, at the moment I am using my current account to hold my EF as I get interest each month for having it there so if there was something unexpected then it would be covered but I'm in the habit of checking each day anyway.

savingholmes

Good luck with the new £ arrangement.