Cooking for one

PasturesNew

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Thinks, just as an intellectual exercise and what would my bills be if there was an Other Half in residence.

Saving on Council Tax = £352 pa
Saving on tv licence = £72.25 pa
Saving on fuel = £348 pa
Saving on insurance = £125 pa
Saving on phone/broadband = £250 pa approx

So - my personal extra expenses pa for being single = £1147.25 each year approx.

Then we come onto only having to pay half the costs involved of work on the house. Right - that would be a bill forthcoming for new kitchen of approx £6,000, instead of having to pay the whole bill of £12,000 to give the example of just one bit of work on the house. Including that kitchen - then I'd have £20,000 approx more in the bank than I actually have.

To buy: half a sofa, half a bed, half a telly, half a freezer, half a fridge ...

To have somebody that might be able to help with something, or do something, or know other people that do things ... so you don't have to pay "a little man" to do odd jobs.

Discounted memberships of a lot of organisations, e.g. single entry £5, couples £8.

Half the fuel cost in a car if you're driving anywhere, cheaper holidays - even B&Bs charge per room and not per person.

It's an endless list ... and after paying all of that they still expect you to eat!

moneyistooshorttomention

I must admit it's struck me recently that I seem to be a "stronger" person than married women I'm friends with - and I'm beginning to see why. Having to pay for everything on one's own, Make A Life on one's own, not having A.N. Other to call on to help with things, bad neighbours are more likely to "try it on" with a single woman on her own (ie taking liberties re the house) and so on and so on. It's no wonder I feel like I'm "stronger" and more "adult" in some ways than my married equivalents. We have to be don't we?:cool:

karcher

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I must admit it's struck me recently that I seem to be a "stronger" person than married women I'm friends with - and I'm beginning to see why. Having to pay for everything on one's own, Make A Life on one's own, not having A.N. Other to call on to help with things, bad neighbours are more likely to "try it on" with a single woman on her own (ie taking liberties re the house) and so on and so on. It's no wonder I feel like I'm "stronger" and more "adult" in some ways than my married equivalents. We have to be don't we?:cool:

I could wax lyrical on the subject, but as I'm having a bad night I will leave that till tomorrow....Me and well me will resolve it alone....no other options available so best get on and be careful not to complain or risk being accused of having a pity party by all the smug (eminently wealthier) couples

katkin

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I must admit it's struck me recently that I seem to be a "stronger" person than married women I'm friends with - and I'm beginning to see why. Having to pay for everything on one's own, Make A Life on one's own, not having A.N. Other to call on to help with things, bad neighbours are more likely to "try it on" with a single woman on her own (ie taking liberties re the house) and so on and so on. It's no wonder I feel like I'm "stronger" and more "adult" in some ways than my married equivalents. We have to be don't we?:cool:

I became a very strong independent woman as a single parent of two boys. I made a good income, carved out a decent social life for myself and had everything under control. Until I met my second husband, some 15 years after the end of my first marriage. He was a bachelor, didn't realise how totally I was in terms of independence, but accepted it as "normal". He liked that about me and still does

It makes me cringe to think that some woman don't embrace their power, individuality and self reliance within a relationship. As far as I know my strong sense of self adds to my relationship. We both have plenty of experience of being singles and build on that to our advantage as a couple.

Maybe I should get out of this thread, but I get all you singles as I feel I was one for 15 plus year, even though I was a single parent.



Ps: PasturesNew I've said before and will again, I love your writing, you should do a book or blog X

Tiddlywinks

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I must admit it's struck me recently that I seem to be a "stronger" person than married women I'm friends with....

Hmmm. I'd say it's more different skills - not stronger IMHO.

I've been single, married then single again, now married (21 years this time). I've also, this time around, had to see my OH go on operational tours to war zones so spent time as a 'pseudo singleton' as well as an equal partner.

Every scenario - single, in a relationship, married with kids etc has its own merits and its own challenges. Course, different people bring their own personalities and abilities into the mix too.

My nana never lived alone - ever - but she was the strongest and most resourceful woman I've ever met.

So, my view is.... it depends.

iammumtoone

katkin wrote: »

Maybe I should get out of this thread, but I get all you singles as I feel I was one for 15 plus year, even though I was a single parent.

No don't do that, it is good to hear from those who have 'come out the other side' :rotfl:

I am a single parent, in some ways it is better than being 'just' single but in others not.

I haven't always been single, obviously, as I have a child but I was mainly single for a long time before I met my ex and was always very independent, in some ways thats why the relationship failed. Strangely now with a child in tow I am less independent/confident than I was when it was just me. I put this down to the fact children are extremely hard work and its more pressure being responsible for two than one (I didn't tend to care if my decisions caused a problem just for me, but now I am also responsible for my child, I find it harder to make decisions as it has to be the right one, if that makes sense)

PasturesNew

katkin wrote: »

Ps: PasturesNew I've said before and will again, I love your writing, you should do a book or blog X

Lots of people have said this over many years, but I am not sure which part of my writing strikes people ... and why .... and ... I do do a blog, but I don't write there like I do here, it's probably "more wooden" as I feel alone. It's not a "blog" like others that's engaging, it's a bit haphazard really

It's probably more like "random notes/quick overview".

katkin

iammumtoone wrote: »

No don't do that, it is good to hear from those who have 'come out the other side' :rotfl:

I am a single parent, in some ways it is better than being 'just' single but in others not.

I haven't always been single, obviously, as I have a child but I was mainly single for a long time before I met my ex and was always very independent, in some ways thats why the relationship failed. Strangely now with a child in tow I am less independent/confident than I was when it was just me. I put this down to the fact children are extremely hard work and its more pressure being responsible for two than one (I didn't tend to care if my decisions caused a problem just for me, but now I am also responsible for my child, I find it harder to make decisions as it has to be the right one, if that makes sense)

I totally get the not feeling as independent or confident with the responsibility of a child. Sometimes I think you don't realise how well you are doing or how strong you are as there isn't much to compare it with. It's not something we really talk about as a society.

Now my sons have grown up and left the coop (26 and 28 now) I realise how much hard work it was, and lonely. Life feels so much easier now. I did have empty nest syndrome when they left for at least a year plus because I was so used to their company but I managed to get over that. I proactively forced myself to get out there and meet new people as I'd got to used to being a home bird and do everything on my own, with them and just me. It was a strange new experience.

When I met my now husband I do believe I was very odd in that I could do everything for myself, had no need for a man lol. Had enough money to solve problems, travel and do what I liked, fulfilling job and a close, but just a few friends. He had to be a very special guy to get through those barriers, but he did and I'm glad I allowed that as married life is easy and very joyful for us.

Gosh, I'm not sure what else to say and have taken this off topic lol..

Keep strong and believe in yourself, as a single parent you are indeed doing better than you realise X

katkin

PasturesNew wrote: »

Lots of people have said this over many years, but I am not sure which part of my writing strikes people ... and why .... and ... I do do a blog, but I don't write there like I do here, it's probably "more wooden" as I feel alone. It's not a "blog" like others that's engaging, it's a bit haphazard really

It's probably more like "random notes/quick overview".

Can we read your blog - linky? I find your writing funny, easy to read, very enjoyable as your views are different to the norm. That's refreshing and a great insight to another perspective. I know we are all individually quite odd as humans, but your unique lifestyle and your resolve about that is great to read about. It feels honest. I like it very much.

Hopefully I've not said anything out of turn here, I can be somewhat tactless at times...

katkin

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'm single, always been single. Never lived with anybody, no kids.

Just never met any bloke that stuck around really ... then time passed and that was it

You have loads of fans on here and we like to hear about your views and life.