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Help!!

Options
I need help, encouragement or a kick up the bum whichever you prefer :rotfl:

I am bogged down with clutter, a dirty messy house, no money and can't get going :mad: This is a daily occurrence....

Our house isn't a nice place to be and I feel so sorry for my OH and son as cos I'm at home all day I feel it ought to be my job to get it sorted but my OH, bless him, does more in an evening than I do in a day :o I get paralysed by how much there is to do, and even when he says start in a corner I still look at the overall mess and can't start, I either go out of the house or hide myself away from it all in front of the computer :rolleyes:

Any tips on how to start getting on top of the mess, dirt, clutter and budget welcome. I know there are fantastic threads on here and I've read them all I think but I wondered if there was anyone out there who was like me and has managed to turn it around??

Kathryn x
2025 - Declutter to Move House
Items Decluttered in 2025: 51
Weight Lost: 0/21

«13

Comments

  • I agree with your OH...You need to start small and perhaps Flylady would be too much too soon. BUT...the sense of achievement you would get would be enormous. Why not start by walking into a room with a bin bag and just binning everything that is rubbish AND BE RUTHLESS!!!!:D
    Then go back into each room and bag up stuff you can recycle/give to charity or ebay.

    That should leave you with a clearer picture of what needs to be done and perhaps then you could start Flying!! ;)

    Good luck and don't stress yourself too much.
  • MrsTinks
    MrsTinks Posts: 15,238 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker Name Dropper
    Yeah me! :)

    I've started with one room... in my case the living room. It's now tidy and clean (most of the time) and means I feel encouraged by it all when I walk in here. I'm tackling the kitchen at the moment and after that I'm heading up to the spare bedroom - maybe by next week :)
    Take a day at a time and give yourself rewards. When I finished the livingroom I bought something I wanted (of Ebay so cheap heehee) and when I finish the kitchen I'll possibly treat myself to a manicure...

    Give yourself targets and rewards and it gets a lot easier... maybe every hour or every 30 mins you do cleaning and tidying you get to spend 5-10 mins on the PC...

    And declutter... oh boy have I decluttered! Use fleabay for this :)
    DFW Nerd #025
    DFW no more! Officially debt free 2017 - now joining the MFW's! :)

    My DFW Diary - blah- mildly funny stuff about my journey
  • lil_me
    lil_me Posts: 13,186 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I'm sure you'll be more than welcome to try flylady, I started like you, didn't know where to start but it gave me a sort of programme to work to which helped vastly.

    Clearing what you don't need/use/want is usually the best option, if that is ebay, carboot or charity shop, of course rubbish to just be flung aswell. The less there is the easier it is to keep tidy.

    Little targets, for example mine at the minute as we're trying to move house is 'One bin bag for flinging (whichever way rubbish, charity shop or ebay) and one bin bag/box to be packed each day' I find this doable, if I tried to pack a room each day I'd have just given up by now!
    One day I might be more organised...........:confused:
    GC: £200
    Slinkies target 2018 - another 70lb off (half way to what the NHS says) so far 25lb
  • I tried flylady, but never got past Monday although my kitchen floor did get cleaned once :D

    I'm going to start with the living room, am clearing out magazines at the moment (I did have a bit of a magazine addiction but I'm overcoming that by internet addiction instead!). I have three binbags of kids toys so I'll have to decide whether they'll sell on ebay or not. They were hiding behind my sofa which was collected today as it broke and the shop couldn't replace it so now the living room looks like a sea of binbags!! Space to start though...
    2025 - Declutter to Move House
    Items Decluttered in 2025: 51
    Weight Lost: 0/21

  • vanilla
    vanilla Posts: 3,277 Forumite
    Kayjay, i know how you feel. I used to lock one door so if anyone came up they had to use the otherdoor to get in as that entrance was a bit tidier and the first words out of my mouth would be '' excuse the mess'' or '' i'm in the middle of a big clean''.
    My only advice is start slow and easy, pick the smallest room and start on one thing (unit, bed, toilet whatever is in there), get 3 bags/boxes (1 for rubbish, 1 for things that should be in another room and 1 for ebay).
    I know once i get into it i carry on, it's the getting into is the problem and as someone suggested allow yourself a treat.
    Sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough.
    And things go wrong no matter what I do.
    Now and then it seems that life is just too much.
    But you've got the love I need to see me through.
    :j :j
  • Put on some really great music, your comfiest jogging clothes, stand up in the middle of the room and just start looking at stuff, visualising where it should go.

    After a couple of minutes, I really feel in the mood and start picking stuff up and putting it away... then I get lost in the music and time flies by - suddenly, you've got a really tidy bit that just inspires you to keep going.

    Then, one spotless room later, you want to do more in the other rooms!

    It's the same way I get myself worked up to do the DIY :-)
    Mortgage | £145,000Unsecured Debt | [strike]£7,000[/strike] £0 Lodgers | |
  • I am afarid there is no easy option, go in with a couple of bin bags and be really bruttle with it if you cant think of a use for it get rid of it!! don't keep hold of it just in case, you will need a bag for keeping, a bag for ebay, a bag for free cycle, a bag for charity, and a bag for rubbish........join your local free cycle group its great!! Start small and you will find once you get going you won't be able to stop and just think of the satisfaction of knowing you tidied that room........then once it is done keep on top of it daily by doing 15 mins tidy up. Good luck
    :snow_laugChristmas is just around the corner :eek:

    Treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself:kisses3:
  • maypole
    maypole Posts: 1,816 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Also, get the washing sorted, wash all the things you don't need to use every day like sheets spare towels etc, you get them put away and it empties the linen bin for clothes. Having a good sort out and throwing away rubbish does you so much good, you feel great afterwards and makes cleaning in the future much easier.:D
  • vij
    vij Posts: 254 Forumite
    If you are finding it that hard and you have kids as well you may be able to get some help from a charity like sure start they have volunteers who will help you in your home or with your family etc.... dont know what the criteria is but may be worth speaking to the doctor about this as the doc may want to check you for depression etc too. King regards and remember be kind to yourself, break it down into chunks and do what you can before its too late to do anything at all.
  • vij wrote: »
    If you are finding it that hard and you have kids as well you may be able to get some help from a charity like sure start they have volunteers who will help you in your home or with your family etc.... dont know what the criteria is but may be worth speaking to the doctor about this as the doc may want to check you for depression etc too. King regards and remember be kind to yourself, break it down into chunks and do what you can before its too late to do anything at all.

    I have been treated for depression and still take my one 'happy pill' a day which keeps it in check. I think that's where it started, and I have a friend whose house is in a very similar state. We're both overweight and live in chaos. Hmmmm maybe there's something linking us!! She does get help from Homestart but where we live they've just lost the funding for our area so are shutting

    I'm still on the living room, still ploughing my way through the rubbish and dustbin sacks ........
    2025 - Declutter to Move House
    Items Decluttered in 2025: 51
    Weight Lost: 0/21

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