Executor excluding benificiary

missbiggles1

LellSasha wrote: »

I havent deducted purposely because I have been trying to keep it sweet and 'in their favour' as much as possible...
I already have a friend staying with me temporarily who will prob stay with me in the long run and contribute towards all bills...this has been discussed.
I am due at court next month to give evidence against the brother and a type of order has been requested.
Thank you for the support it seems deep rooted emotions and the fear of being uprooted after everything I have already had to go through itsnt a good enough reason to WANT to buy a house. I know that doesnt help legally but understanding is free and it wasnt such a big deal to me I would have given in a long time ago..so thank you x

Is your friend paying rent to the other owners because s/he certainly should be, as should you?

moneyistooshorttomention

Cakeguts wrote: »

It isn't worth it in the long run. If you buy this house and spend a lot of money on it doing it up and then sometime in the future sell it for more than you have paid now you will create a lot of ill feeling. A house can be replaced. Brothers can never be replaced. You are fighting with your brothers over a pile of bricks. It is completely ridiculous. There is also something wrong here with you and your attachment to this particular pile of bricks. I tend to think that people are more important than things. Your emotions over the death of your mother are interfering with your relationship with your brothers who have also lost their mother. Rather than fighting them you should all be supporting each other but sadly a pile of bricks has got all your attention.

It is time now to let go. This house is no longer your mother's house it is just a house. It will soon just be an empty house. What you need to do is to buy a house of your own one that when you come to sell it you can't be accused of buying it cheaply to cheat your brother's out of their inheritance. Your uncle is doing a really really good job to try and help you maintain your relationship with your brothers.

I guess you didn't notice the post where OP said one of her brothers has beaten her up then?

Or the fact that it's obvious the other brother is supporting Thug Brother?

There IS no relationship there to lose. That went the second Thug Brother landed the first blow on OP. I would imagine OP switched off any positive feelings she had for him 5 seconds afterwards. Been there - done that and I switched off my feelings towards a couple of different people the second they did something inexcusable to me. So I imagine OP did the same...

OP has said why she wants that particular house - ie because it's a particularly nice house. That sounds like a good objective reason to want a particular house to me.

LellSasha

Cakeguts wrote: »

It isn't worth it in the long run. If you buy this house and spend a lot of money on it doing it up and then sometime in the future sell it for more than you have paid now you will create a lot of ill feeling. A house can be replaced. Brothers can never be replaced. You are fighting with your brothers over a pile of bricks. It is completely ridiculous. There is also something wrong here with you and your attachment to this particular pile of bricks. I tend to think that people are more important than things. Your emotions over the death of your mother are interfering with your relationship with your brothers who have also lost their mother. Rather than fighting them you should all be supporting each other but sadly a pile of bricks has got all your attention.

It is time now to let go. This house is no longer your mother's house it is just a house. It will soon just be an empty house. What you need to do is to buy a house of your own one that when you come to sell it you can't be accused of buying it cheaply to cheat your brother's out of their inheritance. Your uncle is doing a really really good job to try and help you maintain your relationship with your brothers.

How dare you!! how dare you comment on the relationship between me and my brothers and inject that I am putting a pile of bricks above our relationship. You know nothing of our backgrounds. My brothers are drug fuelled selfish people who are only interested in drugs and money and were like that even before my mother passed away hence my mother asking me to move into her house to keep her and her house running for as long as possible. My mother was a money machine for them and theyve verbally expressed this something they out aboive family values. They have been offered their money like they wanted and that should be enough - instead they are hell bent on fighting ME to keep what is now the roof over my head. The roof I want. They dont want it so were not fighting over it theyre just fighting me on getting the option I want when either way they get theirs! You have no idea the type of people they are and it goes beyond fighting over a pile of bricks. This pile of bricks is my home and was my mums that she worked damn hard for. They do not care where they lay their head they just see it as another thing they can destroy at no cost to them. I do not need to justify my family situation to a stranger on the net because their judgement was all wrong.

LellSasha

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Is your friend paying rent to the other owners because s/he certainly should be, as should you?

neither one of us are and its something that the execs only brought up recently...it was unknown to me that this was even a factor...

moneyistooshorttomention

LellSasha wrote: »

How dare you!! how dare you comment on the relationship between me and my brothers and inject that I am putting a pile of bricks above our relationship. You know nothing of our backgrounds. My brothers are drug fuelled selfish people who are only interested in drugs and money and were like that even before my mother passed away hence my mother asking me to move into her house to keep her and her house running for as long as possible. My mother was a money machine for them and theyve verbally expressed this something they out aboive family values. They have been offered their money like they wanted and that should be enough - instead they are hell bent on fighting ME to keep what is now the roof over my head. The roof I want. They dont want it so were not fighting over it theyre just fighting me on getting the option I want when either way they get theirs! You have no idea the type of people they are and it goes beyond fighting over a pile of bricks. This pile of bricks is my home and was my mums that she worked damn hard for. They do not care where they lay their head they just see it as another thing they can destroy at no cost to them. I do not need to justify my family situation to a stranger on the net because their judgement was all wrong.

:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T Good for you for standing up for yourself against that comment.:T

LellSasha

Cakeguts wrote: »

It isn't worth it in the long run. If you buy this house and spend a lot of money on it doing it up and then sometime in the future sell it for more than you have paid now you will create a lot of ill feeling. A house can be replaced. Brothers can never be replaced. You are fighting with your brothers over a pile of bricks. It is completely ridiculous. There is also something wrong here with you and your attachment to this particular pile of bricks. I tend to think that people are more important than things. Your emotions over the death of your mother are interfering with your relationship with your brothers who have also lost their mother. Rather than fighting them you should all be supporting each other but sadly a pile of bricks has got all your attention.

It is time now to let go. This house is no longer your mother's house it is just a house. It will soon just be an empty house. What you need to do is to buy a house of your own one that when you come to sell it you can't be accused of buying it cheaply to cheat your brother's out of their inheritance. Your uncle is doing a really really good job to try and help you maintain your relationship with your brothers.

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I guess you didn't notice the post where OP said one of her brothers has beaten her up then?

Or the fact that it's obvious the other brother is supporting Thug Brother?

There IS no relationship there to lose. That went the second Thug Brother landed the first blow on OP. I would imagine OP switched off any positive feelings she had for him 5 seconds afterwards. Been there - done that and I switched off my feelings towards a couple of different people the second they did something inexcusable to me. So I imagine OP did the same...

OP has said why she wants that particular house - ie because it's a particularly nice house. That sounds like a good objective reason to want a particular house to me.

and this...thank you...
its a nice little revenge on the fact that I never kept my mouth shut about the violence as also verbally expressed..
how has this become about this and not whether I have a choice with the executors?????

missbiggles1

LellSasha wrote: »

neither one of us are and its something that the execs only brought up recently...it was unknown to me that this was even a factor...

It would seem obvious to most people that was a factor - your brothers each own a third of the house so I'd expect there to be unpaid rent due as well as rent to be paid in the future.

I'm afraid that, yet again, you're seeing this as your house when it's nothing of the kind. In fact, I'd be very careful about letting a friend move in without some kind of legal arrangement with the three of you because, if somebody else buys the house, they aren't going to want it with a sitting tenant!

LellSasha

missbiggles1 wrote: »

It would seem obvious to most people that was a factor - your brothers each own a third of the house so I'd expect there to be unpaid rent due as well as rent to be paid in the future.

I'm afraid that, yet again, you're seeing this as your house when it's nothing of the kind. In fact, I'd be very careful about letting a friend move in without some kind of legal arrangement with the three of you because, if somebody else buys the house, they aren't going to want it with a sitting tenant!

Its hardly an obvious factor when I have never lived in a dead persons house before...I was paying the mortgage on behalf of everybody. Since the house is all still in mums name it doesnt belong to any of us so how do I pay rent to 2 people that dont own the house...again not obvious...
the person staying with me hasnt officially moved in they have their own property and stay with me for my own peace of mind..
Im not seeing this as my house I am seeing this as mums house that I live in that they dont want....its entirely different..your own personal judgements really need to stop because unless anyone can offer me something of fact then its not really relevant...

missbiggles1

LellSasha wrote: »

Its hardly an obvious factor when I have never lived in a dead persons house before...I was paying the mortgage on behalf of everybody. Since the house is all still in mums name it doesnt belong to any of us so how do I pay rent to 2 people that dont own the house...again not obvious...
the person staying with me hasnt officially moved in they have their own property and stay with me for my own peace of mind..
Im not seeing this as my house I am seeing this as mums house that I live in that they dont want....its entirely different..your own personal judgements really need to stop because unless anyone can offer me something of fact that its not really relevant...

You'll need to be paying rent for the house you don't own but you need to be paying it (AFAIK) to the estate, not to your brothers.

I'm afraid that it is a fact that neither you nor your friend can live rent free in a house you don't own.

LellSasha

missbiggles1 wrote: »

You'll need to be paying rent for the house you don't own but you need to be paying it (AFAIK) to the estate, not to your brothers.

I'm afraid that it is a fact that neither you nor your friend can live rent free in a house you don't own.

my fact comment was based on your assumption of how I view the house..
in regards the rent this is my first time ever in a situation like this I wasnt to know...and the execs havent discussed this with me...ever...all they say is a stay here for free (aside from me paying the insurance) which I thought meant from when I stopped paying the mortgage..