Chores for children

Batman2017

svain wrote: »

Taking their own plates to the kitchen and loading into dishwasher isnt a chore. Returning cups, plates etc from their bedroom isnt a chore either .... Its a minimum requirement. Tidying up behind them after playing, drawing etc is also preferable. Making a cup of tea/coffee is also a nice quality,

Rest of it .... bedding, laundry, cleaning, housework, cooking, packing up own lunches etc isnt for kids to do!!.
This is the parents responsibility. If the parent doesnt want the extra work of kids then get a cleaner/housekeeper etc, or dont have kids .... some of the expectations being put on kids is one step away from slave labour, cloaked in "how it prepares them for later life" ... what tosh!!. Most kids are absolutely fine when they get to adulthood.

Let kids have fun, enjoy there down time and stop pushing responsibility into them and stop nagging them about this type of stuff. Kids have most their lives to worry about responsibility

adults are not slaves either. whats wrong with kids helping out and doing their bit? Kids are fortunate these days with so many modern luxuries. Hardly the days of yore when they were down the mines working as child labour.

TBagpuss

svain wrote: »

Rest of it .... bedding, laundry, cleaning, housework, cooking, packing up own lunches etc isnt for kids to do!!.
This is the parents responsibility. If the parent doesnt want the extra work of kids then get a cleaner/housekeeper etc, or dont have kids .... some of the expectations being put on kids is one step away from slave labour, cloaked in "how it prepares them for later life" ... what tosh!!. Most kids are absolutely fine when they get to adulthood.

Let kids have fun, enjoy there down time and stop pushing responsibility into them and stop nagging them about this type of stuff. Kids have most their lives to worry about responsibility

I strongly disagree. Things like housework and cooking don't happen by magic, it is perfectly reasonable for every member of the household to help out . Obviously what you do and when you do it is dependent on age and capacity. It's really offensive to suggest that it is remotely similar to salve labour.

I think it is totally appropriate to expect children to help out, and to tailor what they do to their age.

Growing up, my siblings and I started with things such as laying and clearing the table, then moved on to first helping with, then doing, washing up. We were all expected to ensure that dirty laundry went into the laundry basket, and to help with washing and putting laundry on the line or bringing it in, on request.

Obviously we made our own beds (or slept in them unmade, if we so chose) and kept our won bedrooms clean.

As we got older we were given the option of preparing our own packed lunches for school, or having a school meal, and were expected to do our own ironing.

We were also all taught to cook, and had an arrrangement that if any of us didn't want to eat the meal being prepared for the family, we were free to cook something different for ourselves, on the basis that we cleaned up afterwards.

I would say that all of this was in place but the time we were in out early teens.

We all have an excellent relationship with our parents, and we all left home with all the skills and experience we needed to be able to look after ourselves and the homes we lived in. I think we all found, on reaching university and moving into shared accommodation, how much easier it was for us than for our peers who had never been expected to help out at home - both in terms of being able to look after ourselves, but also in being able to fit into a shared house with others and to pull our weight.

It is a nightmare to find yourself in shared accommodation with someone who has no idea how to look after themself and who has been conditioned to expect someone else to ensure that things get cleaned / tidied / put away.

I think you do a real disservice to your children if you don't expect them to help out from an early age so they grow up with the skills to look after them self, and the expectation that everyone in the household has responsibilities to ensure that it works smoothly and that no one person is expected to do all the work.

Batman2017

I suspect svain either comes from a household where they have no kids / Is wealthy and doesnt have the pressures that normal working families face / or does everything in the house and is now wondering why everybody else is so different and is trying to justify doing all the housework by him/herself.

svain

Batman2017 wrote: »

I suspect svain either comes from a household where they have no kids / Is wealthy and doesnt have the pressures that normal working families face / or does everything in the house and is now wondering why everybody else is so different and is trying to justify doing all the housework by him/herself.

If it matters ... normal household, 2 kids and average income. We still never chose to hound the kids over the trivialities of running a home. That was our responsibility.

Both kids now married with own family and survived just fine when they left home because they have common sense, learnt from any of their own mistakes, asked when they needed help and realised very quickly what they didnt do, didnt get done (kids are clever like that )

You can tell the people who ARE trying to justify their reasoning, because they write very long posts or try to deflect to other posters

indsty

I've never understood the concept of "chores". We lived as a family and all mucked in together as a family. We would all do whatever was necessary in a way appropriate to how old we were. The older one helped the younger one, the parents helped each other or the children. Making it a "chore" sounds like making ordinary living into a punishment.

The children never made a fuss as it was always seen as normal.

svain

indsty wrote: »

I've never understood the concept of "chores". We lived as a family and all mucked in together as a family. We would all do whatever was necessary in a way appropriate to how old we were. The older one helped the younger one, the parents helped each other or the children. Making it a "chore" sounds like making ordinary living into a punishment.

The children never made a fuss as it was always seen as normal.

Some people like the feeling of power, control and lists/tick boxes.

peachyprice

Batman2017 wrote: »

slightly off topic but does anyone know why i can thank some posts but not others? i ask as there are some on here that i want to thank but cant. some that i can but dont want to.

It's an old resurrected thread, the 'thank' button becomes unusable after a certain period.

Loz01

I feel like kids deffo need some chores - esp boys. The next generation of men will be quite pampered judging by the way my colleagues treat their sons!!! The girls have to tidy and do washing at 14 but my colleagues 22 year old son still phones her asking "whats for tea" when he's been home all day and she's at work lmao