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Anonymous nasty neighbour...
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privatepath
Posts: 18 Forumite
Long - sorry
I rent a Victorian mid terrace house, although the house is semi detached. There is a path running alongside 'my' house (accessed through 'my' gate from the road) which theoretically gives access to about 3 or 4 other people's gardens from 2 roads at a tangent to mine. I have access to both a side door of my house, and my garden gate down this path. Outside my house, I have two garden gates - one to my front door, and one for this path.
As far as I know, none of the other gardens/owners use this access, because as soon as you go past my garden gate, the path is overgrown. That is why I don't know how many gardens it accesses - I have never been through it to see how many there are - I think I remember the estate agent saying there were 3 houses allowed access.
I maintain and clear the path from the pavement to my garden door, but no further. This house I rent apparently owns the path and in the deeds grants access to the other home owners to access to their gardens.
I hope that is clear.
Now I parked and locked my bike on this gate two days ago. I don't usually park it on the gate, but just did that day for no particular reason. This morning someone had sellotaped a note to my bike in caps 'DO NOT BLOCK COMMUNAL BACK ALLEY'.
That was the note, no name, no please, nothing. I have only been in this house for 2 months and have never seen anyone apart from me using this path. It was quite overgrown and difficult to use it until I cut back the vines and trees which overhung it from my neighbours property.
I found the note really aggressive. I now don't want to move my bike, because I want to know which of my 'neighbours' is ordering me about so nicely. If it was a neighbour who needed access to their garden for any reason, I'm sure they would have found it much easier to come knock on the door, and say 'we need to get through, please move bike' etcetc.
Obviously if anyone had asked me to move I would have fallen over myself to move the bike and apologised profusely, but the way this has come across, it's almost the last thing I want to do. Lots of passersby would have seen the note as it was huge caps on A4, filling the whole page and I live near a station and a school.
Should I ignore and wait for a more official letter asking for access? I now want to padlock this gate (but move my bike in case they slash the tyres or something) just so that whoever needs access has to come and ask. It's not a public pathway, it is a privately owned one, which gives rights to a few other owners.
Has anyone experienced anything like this? Or can offer advice?
Thanks
PS I am a longish term member of this site but don't want to be identified by info given above so am using new account.
I rent a Victorian mid terrace house, although the house is semi detached. There is a path running alongside 'my' house (accessed through 'my' gate from the road) which theoretically gives access to about 3 or 4 other people's gardens from 2 roads at a tangent to mine. I have access to both a side door of my house, and my garden gate down this path. Outside my house, I have two garden gates - one to my front door, and one for this path.
As far as I know, none of the other gardens/owners use this access, because as soon as you go past my garden gate, the path is overgrown. That is why I don't know how many gardens it accesses - I have never been through it to see how many there are - I think I remember the estate agent saying there were 3 houses allowed access.
I maintain and clear the path from the pavement to my garden door, but no further. This house I rent apparently owns the path and in the deeds grants access to the other home owners to access to their gardens.
I hope that is clear.
Now I parked and locked my bike on this gate two days ago. I don't usually park it on the gate, but just did that day for no particular reason. This morning someone had sellotaped a note to my bike in caps 'DO NOT BLOCK COMMUNAL BACK ALLEY'.
That was the note, no name, no please, nothing. I have only been in this house for 2 months and have never seen anyone apart from me using this path. It was quite overgrown and difficult to use it until I cut back the vines and trees which overhung it from my neighbours property.
I found the note really aggressive. I now don't want to move my bike, because I want to know which of my 'neighbours' is ordering me about so nicely. If it was a neighbour who needed access to their garden for any reason, I'm sure they would have found it much easier to come knock on the door, and say 'we need to get through, please move bike' etcetc.
Obviously if anyone had asked me to move I would have fallen over myself to move the bike and apologised profusely, but the way this has come across, it's almost the last thing I want to do. Lots of passersby would have seen the note as it was huge caps on A4, filling the whole page and I live near a station and a school.
Should I ignore and wait for a more official letter asking for access? I now want to padlock this gate (but move my bike in case they slash the tyres or something) just so that whoever needs access has to come and ask. It's not a public pathway, it is a privately owned one, which gives rights to a few other owners.
Has anyone experienced anything like this? Or can offer advice?
Thanks
PS I am a longish term member of this site but don't want to be identified by info given above so am using new account.
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Comments
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I'd knock on the doors of the neighbours and very politely ask if they had left the note and how the problem could be solved. If they are aggressive then defuse them by saying that you are only out to be a good neighbour and that's why you've popped by.
It will show them that you are willing to stand up for yourself, and if they are doing it anonymously, chances are they won't admit it, but they'll know you've got the guts to stand up for yourself.
It may be that there's some sort of long standing problem that predates you. I had a border dispute with my neighbours when I moved in. Was all to do with the previous owner. A few well placed kind words in the right places and getting to know people did the trick, and no longer have a border dispute (they used to lock the gate to stop me accessing it, now they don't).
Good luck!Please stay safe in the sun and learn the A-E of melanoma: A = asymmetry, B = irregular borders, C= different colours, D= diameter, larger than 6mm, E = evolving, is your mole changing? Most moles are not cancerous, any doubts, please check next time you visit your GP.
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To be honest, if it was me and didn't "need" to lock my bike to the gate, I would just move it and move on. There must be nothing worse than not getting on with neighbours and quite honestly you were in the wrong to lock your bike there. Maybe the person who sent the note was a bit abrupt, but worried in case of urgently needing access to the gate, such as an accident or something. Wouldn't hurt to ask around and apologize for locking the bike there in the first place IMO.0
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Thanks for your posts. It could be a pre-existing problem with the previous owner/tenant - which would explain things.
However, I really don't think that it is one of the people entitled to access, as surely if they needed access they would have come knocking, or at least have cleared their portion of the path?
I'm thinking it might be someone else entirely who knows about this access path, and is trying (and succeeding) in making me feel v. uncomfortable for their own reasons. Paranoid maybe, but possible.
I am alone with 2 small children, so maybe I'm worrying more than necessary, but I just cannot imagine writing such a note - which would be very publicly seen, without having an enormous grudge against someone.0 -
I hate it when rights of way are blocked for any reason by anybody at any time. And they say things like "Just ask and I'll move it". I shouldn't HAVE to go to the trouble/embarrassment of asking. I am the anxious sort....
And, invariably, when you do, the sod who answers the door isn't the sod that owns the contraption doing the blocking... then they get called and the story's told and they look out and grunt ... and go off to get their keys .... and ... then it's slow progress for them to get out of the way.
That's why rights of way exist. And people have a right to pass and repass. Meaning it is an "offence" to block them even if it's just for a bit.
It's just rude. :P0 -
I can understand your feelings as I also feel the same way, but it is not a public right of way, and the other people who have right of way wouldn't be able to get through without a blow torch or a seriously big pair of clippers.
Does that alter your opinion?0 -
Hi privatepath,
You've got to do what's right for you, and I can appreciate your not wanting to make a big deal. People get stressed out and do stupid things and chances are that this is someone having a bad day, rather than with a personal vendetta.
I'd still speak to the neighbours though, because if there is something pre-existing, even if they aren't involved, chances are they'll know about it. It may be why they don't access their paths...
And if you're pleasant to them, and they are back to you, chances are they'll look out for you and your two small children. I still have some faith in humanity, hopefully they can't all be snotty b*stards!Please stay safe in the sun and learn the A-E of melanoma: A = asymmetry, B = irregular borders, C= different colours, D= diameter, larger than 6mm, E = evolving, is your mole changing? Most moles are not cancerous, any doubts, please check next time you visit your GP.
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Not really! I think the chances are that it is someone who has right of access but can't be bothered knocking on everyones door to find out who the bike owner is. If someone blocked my drive with their car, I wouldn't knock on doors, I'd leave a note on the car telling them to move the b..... thing! Does not matter if the access is used once or every day it should be accessible at all times!0
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I would go round and see the 3 neighbours that are allowed access, and ask them if a)they put the note on the bike, and b)if they use the access via that gate.
If they DID stick the note on the bike (or you suspect it was them), and they claim they do use the gate as access, then ask them if they're willing to pay 1/4 of the costs to have the access cleared, as you're being a kind neighbour and willing to organise it now you know that someone else does use it...Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')
No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)0 -
Hi
I think you may be worrying a little unnecessarily - I wouldn't take that note as being really rude or that someone is out to get you or anything.
If you look at it from their point of view, they are trying to get to their garden and you have blocked their right of way. They are probably thinking its you that is being thoughtless! Ok they are under the misimpression that the path is communal whereas you know its privately owned, and perhaps leaving the note isn't the most diplomatic way of communicating with your neighbours, but then should they have to go knocking on doors to get their own garden?
Just trying to put a different perspective on this, thats all - I'm not trying to be horrible I promise
I know that living on your own with children (I'm a single mum with a kiddie myself), sometimes you do feel more vulnerable about things, I know I have in the past.
If it was me, I would just move the bike and avoid any confrontation. Obviously if there are any future problems that perhaps a rethink on tactics is appropriate.
All the best,0 -
I have to say that I believe vivatifosi has hit the nail right on the head with this one. Negotiation gets one a long way further (usually) than confrontation. This might even be OP's chance to meet the neighbour(s), clear the air if one of them has a problem, and perhaps even forge a brand new friendship.
Having said that, I agree that 'please' would have made the whole thing a little sweeter but that's people for you.0
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