Silkglade's DFW debt to debt free Diary.. Please keep me on the straight and narrow!!

barnaby-bear

silkglade wrote: »

LOL It is not that bad that I said no really, (honest I am doing her a favour) it is her birthday on Saturday and she has asked everone for money to get a nintendo Wii. so she won't bl**dy use them after sat anyway

Included in the debt on the credit card IS the nintendo Wii and she has a total of 8 games (we got some mega bargains) (I got a brand new and sealed Pirates 3 game for 23pence from amazon!! also some other mega bargains, and we have worked out that we have saved her more than £100. actually alot more than £100. and we know from family etc that we will be getting back a minimum of around £130 on saturday towards it. Will be paid into the bank on Monday)

Also My son has his birthday in a few months and we already have his Xbox 360 ellite at a mega bargain price by pre ordering it, and got a brand new game with it free.

Please note that this is a one off and that they will never get expensive presents like this again. It is just that they have gone without so much that we decided to make this year totally special. I know my son's is alot more expensive than my daughters, but his dad will be contributing too.:T

You don't have to justify yourself! You do have to make the budget balance and pay the credit card bill - you know if you can afford it. You earned the money, you live with the budget choices.
Seeing the *value* for money is our priority - if games consoles are the families big thing and they provide hours of entertainment and mean you because busy and don't spend on stuff you don't use then you know the value. The difficult seems to be getting the maximum value/enjoyment out of the budget without guilty without being la-la-because-i'm worth-it land or yo-yo dieting. If £30 for a night or two out means your OH cares/vested interest and has an interest in the budget then maybe it works out as a saving, weneed an incentive like seeing the debt go down now we seem to need to see some improvement/value in life in return for the daily grind otherwise it's s&d it let's put x,y, z on the cards. These forums are starting to educate me on all the games consoles I should want :cool:

MissKJ

If she is old enough to understand the concepts of maney management, maybe you could ask her to sell something else to make up her shortfall, rather than live with the guilt of saying "no" without options. I know, I am too soft, I don't even know her but do remember being desperate for something as a child, and I feel so sorry for her!:rolleyes: But really, you did do the right thing.

silkglade

barnaby-bear wrote: »

You don't have to justify yourself! You do have to make the budget balance and pay the credit card bill - you know if you can afford it. You earned the money, you live with the budget choices.
Seeing the *value* for money is our priority - if games consoles are the families big thing and they provide hours of entertainment and mean you because busy and don't spend on stuff you don't use then you know the value. The difficult seems to be getting the maximum value/enjoyment out of the budget without guilty without being la-la-because-i'm worth-it land or yo-yo dieting. If £30 for a night or two out means your OH cares/vested interest and has an interest in the budget then maybe it works out as a saving, weneed an incentive like seeing the debt go down now we seem to need to see some improvement/value in life in return for the daily grind otherwise it's s&d it let's put x,y, z on the cards. These forums are starting to educate me on all the games consoles I should want :cool:

You know you have a very clever head on those shoulders of yours :T, You know my whole life has been about justifying myself... either to a over dominant mum, or to myself (poss due to over dominant mum):rolleyes: It is breaking those lifelong habbits that are the most difficult.

I know that part of the debt problem was due to buying an old house that then needed loads spent on it, had to get double glazing etc.. also fact it was got with my Sons dad (obviously now my ex). Other part of my problem was I used to go shopping lost just to make myself feel better (obviously I have now confrunted my deomons)

I am sure that it will take us quite a long time to stop feeling guilty about spending money and asking each others permission (sad I know) but true anyway. Now looking back at how totally miserable we were I would have done things differently (not been quite so strict, had a BIT of a life)

tealady

Having read your thread (well done by the way), could your O/H do some part time term time only work whilst the children are in school. And could you ask for more maintenance (kids seem to get more expensive as they grow). Don't forget things like cash back site and pigsback for clicks (I get all my toiletries from Boots for free thanks to that site!)

silkglade

tealady wrote: »

Having read your thread (well done by the way), could your O/H do some part time term time only work whilst the children are in school. And could you ask for more maintenance (kids seem to get more expensive as they grow). Don't forget things like cash back site and pigsback for clicks (I get all my toiletries from Boots for free thanks to that site!)

Thanks for your post, unfortunatly hubby cant get a part time job as my youngest is only 2 and not yet at school. We can't manage it as I do shift work and work different days and nights every week with relief that can be any combination of days or nights for 7 days every 5 weeks

Maintenance has recently gone up from £50 anyway. Also his dad does pay half towards uniform, school trips etc on request.

silkglade

Evening everone - well my day today - took some more dvd's into work to sell as had got a text saying someone wanted them. That money is sat waiting till monday to pay it in to the bank when we have daughters birthday money to add to it. :T

I am feeling rather frustrated today as I have things to ebay but hubby wants to wait till after the birthday part (dosn't want things laying aroud) I just want to get it photographed and listed..:mad:

I really hate the waiting game, I hate it when you know that you'll be able to make a payment that will make a difference but that you can't do it yet. (need to wait till monday and I will be able to make a nice big payment though)

silkglade

Hi everyone.

My day today has been brilliant, been to the cinema and seen 2 films :T I love the days out that cost nothing.

So today I have managed a no spend day. :j

Dreading tomorrow as it is my daughters birthday and we will have a housefull of 7 and 8 year olds!!!

Think I will need a bottle of wine for the evening when they have gone and my 3 are in bed :rotfl:

silkglade

Well what a day today has been!! It was my daughters birthday party, everything went well but I am knackered and have a stinking cold.... Have had for a few days now.

Looking forward to going to bed soon.

Daughters birthday tomorrow so will have another busy day!!!

At least everything is all sorted.

silkglade

Well my daughters birthday today and it has been going really well, she was so supprised with her presents bless her. Infact she was in total shock of about 30 seconds when she opened her main one (nintendo Wii)

I still feel really ill and have no energy so am rather happy to say that our visitors have all left. Though there will be a couple of friends popping in later.

Life will be back to the normal dfw way of life again from tomorrow (I hope) all being well.

Will be able to get on with the ebaying now at last. Might even get some of the photos taken today if I am lucky (kids permitting of course)

silkglade

Well, not been on here for a while - been really busy with work and the whole family has been ill and I have also been feeling rather down so not really felt like posting.

I have now listed some items on ebay, hoping they go well, only 7 items but hoping they will bring in some cash to pay off the credit card.

Also had some good news to the tune of a £231.18 rebate from my housing association for over estimated the service charge from the last financial year (in a part rent part buy house on a new little estate) I phoned them when I recieved the letter and they said I would have to put it in writing if we wanted a cheque. Did that last monday. phoned them this tues as concerned that the letter arrived ok with all the postal strikes and they confirmed that they had it and that a cheque should be sent in approx 14 days. much to our supprise it landed on the mat this morning and is now in our bank account. :T

I have to say that I am feeling so fed up and skint all the time, it is really taking it's toll.