The Ultimate Incentive muddles along

kavics17

Nice to see everyone back.

It is interesting to read that both you Birdie and Cinny decided on having only one, I wonder how one comes to this decision. I always thought that I would have at least 2 children, more likely 3 and I struggled to accept last year that mini Kavics might be an only one. She will most likely not have any siblings as after 5 years I am still single that although still would have another if I could.

Dinah, I love the yoga pics on fb, I really would like to go for classes but can't find any which would suit me and the babysitter so sticking to running for now.

wendz86

Hope everyone had good weekends? Mine was good, went to my friends 30th party Friday night and spent yesterday with my sister and niece.

I know what you mean Dinah, was a busy weekend so no cleaning has been done and need to sort the house out desperately. Next weekend fairly quiet thankfully.

Kavics if i met someone i would probably have a third if they wanted one although saying that I am enjoying the freedom of them getting older now.

ruby_eskimo

Hi everyone, glad to see people popping back in.

I think we've decided to not go down the kids route full stop to be honest. DH has always been anti-children and I was always a bit unsure. When we got engaged he said that if I wanted children then he'd go along with it, but I don't want someone to just go along with it, I'd want someone to be fully on board. I'm more scared of babies than having a burning desire to have one so it's unlikely to be in our future and I'm ok with that.

As I work in IT in the NHS, we've had a rather busy weekend. Thankfully our organisation was fine but that doesn't mean we haven't had call after call about the whole thing. Upside is that I haven't been able to do much work today as we've been on a bit of lock down just in case.

Cinny91

Have you thought about using a donor, Kavics? My friend is currently expecting as a single parent from using a donor, she's younger than me so it's definitely a more common thing these days.

I think it's a multitude of factors, I always have a couple of "reasons" for quick fire answers when we get asked but ultimately I'm incredibly happy being Oscar's mum {full stop}. Equally, I know plenty of people who aren't having children at all. Can think of 3 off the top of my head but there are probably more. I think that's fantastic, we live in a time where women aren't having endless numbers of kids because there is no alternative. But also, we're able to have children outside of the nuclear family structure without (on the most part, I guess) people being ostracised for it.

Oh god, Ruby. I can imagine this last weekend has been a bit of a nightmare! It is worrying to think though, how much of a crash it caused, I didn't even think the NHS was that reliant on their computer system (mostly because from what I've seen they're very old computers!)

Dinah93

So stressed with building crap I'm hardly sleeping. There was a miscommunication clearly where I thought the quote of 'it'll be under £5k' was all in, not labour only. Have gone on to order glazing off the back of that, only to now find it's labour but not materials. Could scream as now we have glazing and quite possibly can't afford to actually put it into an extension. Worst comes to the worst we will be left with a boarded up hole at the back of the kitchen until we can save up enough to do the extension. Not the most secure though

Perfectly valid choice Cinny, I'm always just curious as to what made people decide to stop, as we're probably done for a lot of practical reasons, but not sure down to emotional ones, so hearing other people's thought processes can help me think of things otherwise I wouldn't have considered.

Current to do list

[STRIKE]
• Email Nursery [/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Call HMRC - no letter received[/STRIKE]
• Call Car garage
  [STRIKE]
• Email Keith/Peter and raise merry hell[/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Email FIL[/STRIKE]
• Update spreadsheet about house
  [STRIKE]
• Reply to yoga emails[/STRIKE]Ongoing in many ways
  [STRIKE]
• Chase invoice from HH[/STRIKE]Still not paid though
• Tidy bedroom
• Upload birthday party photos
• Send all FBA parcels to Amazon
• Complete assignment 3
• Do any alterations from weekends coursework
  [STRIKE]
• Send DVLA letter
• Medicash claim[/STRIKE]
• Email George from congress
• Email Yoga leggs
• Update website Started, it's taking a while especially as I'm trying to integrate some booking software. Finally found one that looks good and has a flat 20p +
  1% model, where most are £25 a month which doesn't make sense for my little business, however speaking to other teachers the ability to book online has brought in a lot of new customers and has also taken them up the search rankings, even on admin time saved it has to be worth losing 28p from each class booking
• Design NIM logo
• Order NIM flyers
  [STRIKE]
• Order work tshirt[/STRIKE]
• NIM uniform tax claim
• Email gyms, try to get more work
  [STRIKE]
• Book ferry [/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Email tesco clubcard [/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Work out how to log onto instructors online system[/STRIKE]
• Reply to recent emails that are starred
  [STRIKE]
• Get code for nursery place[/STRIKE] Done what I can, I have to wait for a phone call to give more information on my income to HMRC.... they have my tax credit return and annual
  [STRIKE]
• Sort car insurance for new car[/STRIKE]
• DLA renewal form
  [STRIKE]
• Apply for active kids funding[/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Book Manchester hotel for next training weekend
• Book hotel for Leicester aqua yoga training day[/STRIKE]
• Draft letter to schools
  [STRIKE]
• Email Victoria
• Email Vicky
• Email Cara
• Return Grace's school trip letter and money
• Do poster alterations for dad[/STRIKE]
• Get partial train ticket refund[STRIKE]
• Email Steve
• Email/Call Ian[/STRIKE]
• Fill in OC Health questionaire
• Get knee x-ray

kavics17

Oh no, I'm not doing this alone again. I have been on my own since I was 4 months pregnant. Never again. Being a mum is the best thing ever but it is the hardest as well. Even being divorced would be better because than at least you can discuss certain things and make decisions together with the father of the child, as a widowed parent you don't have this luxury. So as much as I want another, it is not happening while I'm alone.

wendz86

What a pain about the miscommunication Dinah, sounds really stressful. You are doing well on your list though.

Kavics - can't imagine how hard it is having all the pressure of parenting on yourself. Although myself and ex are obviously not together I do appreciate having that person to call on in difficult situations etc.

It's Heidi's birthday in two weeks and have no idea what to get her. We seem to have every toy under the sun already. I'm thinking of getting her a paddling pool as the one we had broke last year. I know she's only 2 just feel bad as Poppy always seems to get more.

Dinah93

We have the same with Ben. 3 weeks until he's 3 and I've got him a new crane for his train set, and the latest supertato book. He is obsessed with dinosaurs though, I would love to find something 'different' and dinosaur based (have lots of books and little figures) and then I think that's him done for his birthday this year.

One of my students recommended me to a gym looking for a yoga instructor, going to look around and meet on Monday but depending on how many classes we agree to it will be £40-£80 extra a week.

Dinah93

Trimmed down to do list, all I did crossed off, just actual current to dos still here

[STRIKE]
• Call Car garage [/STRIKE]
  [STRIKE]
• Update spreadsheet about house [/STRIKE]
• Tidy bedroom
• Upload birthday party photos
  [STRIKE]
• Send all FBA parcels to Amazon[/STRIKE]
• Complete assignment 3
• Do any alterations from weekends coursework
• Email George from congress
• Email Yoga leggs
• Update website
• Add mailing list function to website
• Add online booking function to website
• Design NIM logo
• Order NIM flyers
• NIM uniform tax claim
• Email gyms, try to get more work Meeting with one on Monday who potentially have up to 4 classes a week for me
• Reply to recent emails that are starred
  [STRIKE]
• Call Stockton council see if they can help with code for 3 year old funding [/STRIKE]
• DLA renewal form
• Draft letter to schools
• Get partial train ticket refund
  [STRIKE]
• Fill in OC Health questionnaire [/STRIKE]
• Get knee x-ray
• Send receipts to BWY
  [STRIKE]
• Do spreadsheet for FIL[/STRIKE]
• Send out all rebooking emails
• Put in claim for yoga festival tickets see if can get refund
• Put in L&G claim

Bit less scary, not much

clearmydebts

Dinah93 wrote: »

Trimmed down to do list, all I did crossed off, just actual current to dos still here

[STRIKE]
• Call Car garage [/STRIKE]
• Update spreadsheet about house
• Tidy bedroom
• Upload birthday party photos
  [STRIKE]
• Send all FBA parcels to Amazon[/STRIKE]
• Complete assignment 3
• Do any alterations from weekends coursework
• Email George from congress
• Email Yoga leggs
• Update website
• Add mailing list function to website
• Add online booking function to website
• Design NIM logo
• Order NIM flyers
• NIM uniform tax claim
• Email gyms, try to get more work Meeting with one on Monday who potentially have up to 4 classes a week for me
• Reply to recent emails that are starred
  [STRIKE]
• Call Stockton council see if they can help with code for 3 year old funding [/STRIKE]
• DLA renewal form
• Draft letter to schools
• Get partial train ticket refund
  [STRIKE]
• Fill in OC Health questionnaire [/STRIKE]
• Get knee x-ray
• Send receipts to BWY
• Do spreadsheet for FIL

Bit less scary, not much

That list looks far more manageable now. Well done, you are ploughing through it!