Joined 31.05.16

Haljordan2814

I also met my OH on match.com, coming up on 5 years ago now. A great deal has changed since then and we're now expecting our second child. So definitely don't dismiss it too soon, there are some decent ones out there!

Good luck with your journey (and not just the debt one)!

lulabelle

Keep going PSL you're doing great! Just out of interest, how old are you? You remind me a lot of a young me!

Nearly le weekend - woo hoo! Love it when it gets to wednesday or after as there is hope!!!

[Deleted User]

Keep at it PSL.

I was gonna try for a NSD today but spent £1.20 on popcorn for my afternoon snack.

Dxxx

Poor_Single_lady

Thank you so much Haljordan2814, Dolly and Lulabelle.

I am trying match I promise. It's just strange. Congratulations on your expectancy! Good to hear it does work out. I know there are some nice ones out there. I think I just need to give it time. It's not easy but i will make it work for me.

Lulabelle I am 30 now and 31 in a few months. I love that my diary reminds you of you!
Sometimes I think nobody can be as stupid as me. Had the urge to spend money today and had an inner battle where the sensible side of my brain got up from its life long slumber which meant I didn't go shopping and today was an NSD.
Tommorow is payday. I am having a frugal weekend but I do have plans to be out so need to make sure I am monitoring myself. I'm actually for the first time staring to feel quite cross with myself. Everyone in my team is looking at holidays and I am repeating to myself inside my head "DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT"

I am finally getting this under control. I've declined a load of invites and have barely been shopping this month. Kitchen is full of yummy things to eat and I am not starving. I do need to learn because I'm almost going bust and it has to stop.

Poor_Single_lady

Payday in 2 hours to last a month.
Only a little bit of social in February.
Lots of foods in the cupboards. Going to do a full stocktake of the kitchen. Plan to cook a bit on 4th Feb for the freezer.
Need to buy some toiletries and some work clothes.
NOT MUCH ELSE

I have dvds and books and some planned social for entertainment.

Tomorrow 27th
Lunch out then home

Saturday 28th
Pub for a bit then home

Sunday 29th
Low spend-Lidl/Sainsbury's

Monday 30th -pay mortgage
Low spend/food shop

Poor_Single_lady

Friday-lunch out then no more spending. Go home and make a shopping list of what is needed in the kitchen and food plan.

Then bed. No going out tonight.

Verbatim

Hi again PSL,
I don't post much because my way of looking at the world is so different from yours and I appreciate that you might not find my comments helpful.
But...
You are saying you need more work clothes. Really? I seem to recall that "need" cropping up regularly on your diary.
Most regular posters tell you that you're doing well but you're not making any headway into your debts so I won't tell you that. If you want your situation to change you have to do things differently. Please consider what are really needs and what are wants. £80 perfume and leg waxing are not "essential", (the latter especially not in winter). Yes you need to look the part in a professional job but it's not a fashion shoot. You don't need a new outfit every month. Do you really not have a load of half used toiletries you could use up rather than buying more?
Have you written a budget for the month prioritising debt repayments?
I think your attitude has changed over the months and the word essential is not cropping up inappropriately nearly as much (!) nowadays. I'm glad too you're not depending on your possible bonus anymore to clear your loan. I hope it materialises but better not to place all your hopes on it in case it doesn't.
When are your exams? Very good luck with those and I hope successs will bring a pay rise?
I'm sure you can turn your situation around if you plan your way out and stick to it.
Wishing you success!
V

Poor_Single_lady

Thank you Verbatim. In an ideal world I would print would what you have said and glue it to my handbag and face.
Everything you have said is all completely true. But I promise you personally I am turning things round.

Exams in April and a marginal pay rise should follow. The company stance re the bonus is tight lipped and most secretive so I am trying not to think about it too much.

I would love to turn this around and become a really good version of myself honestly. I am learning, growing and changing.
I can see why you don't want to post to me because I do behave most foolishly but I do appreciate everything that you have written to me. With sincere thanks. xx

AleMrsT

PSL I have to say, I love reading your diary! Yes you're having blips occasionally, and sometimes it is frustrating to read as you so desperately want to make headway and you really do know what you need to do,but your honesty is wonderful. You KNOW exactly where you keep going wrong, but as long as you keep recognising that and moving forward, you will get there eventually. Verbatim is definitely right in terms of what you deem essential and what others see as frivolous spends. But you are a 30 year old singleton with what sounds like a stressful London job, and I imagine it is exhausting feeling like you have to be 'available' for everything that may be required of you in a work capacity.

I'm the same age as you, and have been married to my husband for four years. We met on match.com 7 years ago, I signed up for 6 months subscription and met my OH within 3 weeks, not very MSE as I couldnt get a refund on the remaining months :rotfl:

I very rarely buy clothes, never go out socialising, am tee total and don't care too hoots about my legs, eyebrows or state of my work clothes. I very often read your diary and think 'how on earth am I married and PSL is still single?! She takes care of herself, has a good job and owns her own place!'

Honestly, I admire you PSL. Your diary has me laughing and feeling frustrated at times, but I am so rooting for you to succeed!

If I remember reading correctly, you don't have internet connected at home is that correct? I was just thinking about your DVD and book purchases. Do you have a library near you? You can loan DVD's as well as books, but the problem for you I imagine would be their limited opening times, which is a shame.

Good luck with everything and please keep posting! x

StokieBecks

Hi PSL not dropped in for a while. I haven't seen any figures in your posts for a while. I know though you have said they have increased not decreased. Hopefully even if you aren't writing it publicly you are aware of why and somewhere you have figures written down that you can update when you make a payment etc to show your progress. It doesn't necessarily matter that the rest of us don't see figures but every month when i have made payments on mine i cross a total out and update with a new total so I can see it going down (slowly but I am a completely different income etc to you)

If you can't pinpoint where the excess debt has come from you need to keep a spending diary for absolutely everything you buy/put on a card whatever. Write what it was and how much. Might help a little bit to see if something was frivilous.

I agree with Verbatim write a plan for yourself (you don't have to share it but all of us on here all want you and each other to succeed) a weeks plan, a months plan, a year plan. Whatever you feel you can work best at. Small targets that you can achieve and cross off.

We all have blips but you can get yourself back on track.