Lone female

Tuesday_Tenor

Jasmine81 wrote: »

Nerja looks lovely and my sort of place but I would worry that I would stand out as a single person.
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Actually, you wouldn't. On my last trip in the area I spent half a day sunbathing on Burriana Beach in Nerja. For the first time ever I hired one of the sunbeds, about £3. Great to have the umbrella over my face, and be off the sand which gets VERY hot by mid-day. I was surrounded by all sorts of different people: 2xyoung British couples in front, 2 elderly German women on my left, a single Spanish woman on my right. I also ate alone at one of the beach caf!s; no problem.

What you, and probably the people who raised their eyebrows in your office, have forgotten through years of being in a tight/tying couple, is that the world is full of single people getting on with their lives, and people doing things on their own, even though they're also in a relationship.

The local people who live in Nerja (lots of different nationalities) go down to the beach on their own all the time. Some because they live alone, some because family/partner are at work that day and they're free! They're not going to NOT go on the beach just because they're on their own!

Far from being conspicuous as a singleton, you'll soon learn that the opposite is true. You become invisible! Couples, in particular, disregard you completely! You'll get used to it! And it's very liberating!

Malaga will be just fine too!

Tuesday_Tenor

melanzana wrote: »

apart from the Train back to the Airport, but that's about a fifteen minute walk away so very doable!

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Bus station is close to train station, so same applies.

I believe train is a bit cheaper and quicker, but it's marginal, and I always use the bus to/from the airport, probably because
(a) I remember having a hassle with the automatic ticket machines the one time I did use the train from the airport. Can't now remember exactly why, but luckily on that occasion I was with a friend who didn't have the same problem!
(B) brings me right into bus station where I get the bus to Nerja.

Voyager2002

Tuesday_Tenor wrote: »

(a) I remember having a hassle with the automatic ticket machines the one time I did use the train from the airport. Can't now remember exactly why, but luckily on that occasion I was with a friend who didn't have the same problem!

Yes: that dreadful ticket machine. I remember once it defeated me, so I took the train without a ticket and was 'caught' by the inspector. He was obviously very used to people who could not get it to sell them a ticket and in fact let me ride for free, apparently because the paperwork involved in selling me a ticket would have been too much trouble. One of the very many reasons why I love Spain...

Tuesday_Tenor

Voyager2002 wrote: »

Yes: that dreadful ticket machine. I remember once it defeated me, so I took the train without a ticket and was 'caught' by the inspector. He was obviously very used to people who could not get it to sell them a ticket and in fact let me ride for free, apparently because the paperwork involved in selling me a ticket would have been too much trouble. One of the very many reasons why I love Spain...

Ha! Made me laugh! So relieved to hear it wasn't just me!
At the time it was most embarrassing as I was the Spanish-speaker and I just couldn't get ANY of the machines to speak to me apart from leading me in circles ! Other travellers came and went, and the machines worked for them. My friend waited patiently. I never got to the bottom of why it didn't like my card or note. We tried with her card and it was OK.

Love Spain, for all sorts of reasons. Have told friends that if I ever disappear, to look for me in Solsona, a wonderful town in Catalunya. If I could speak Catalan, I think I'd have moved there already ...!

Jasmine81

Thanks Melanzana for the hotel recommendation. I don't mind a 15 minute walk to a train station. Looks like if I take the train I'd need to give myself plenty of time to fight with the ticket machines!

Tuesday Ten-you are so right about when you are a couple you are in your own little bubble. I have met a whole new world of people since I've split with the ex but that is another story.

There are so many fascinating places in Spain and away from the main tourist resorts. If this solo trip works out I can see another trip in the making.

[Deleted User]

Jasmine81 wrote: »

Hi I'm a new poster but a long term lurker I would appreciate any advice/recommendations and sorry for all of the questions.

Back story- I'm a female in her 30's and divorced last year. I haven't been away on holiday for a couple of years and need one after the eventful couple of years. My friends are coupled up with children so they holiday with their family. If I want a holiday, it looks like I need to do it on my own. I'm very shy and quiet so a solo holiday is daunting.

Anyway, so far I have booked a three night holiday in Spain. It is an activity based so the loneliness factor won't be an issue and they seem to have quite a few solo travellers. I am toying with the idea of spending two nights at the end in one of the beach resorts. I guess it would be nicer to recover from the activity holiday lying by a pool in the sun rather than at home.

So has anyone been to a Spanish holiday resort on their own and did they feel uncomfortable as they were on their own? What did you do at meal times? Did you get any looks? I am thinking about Benalmadena and plan just to read my books by the pool/on the beach, wonder around and visit a couple of things. I just get self-conscious and would worry that people would think I'm a bit weird. I have mentioned the holiday to a couple of work mates and they have raised an eyebrow.

I would also be grateful for any tips if I decide to book something. Also if you have any recommendations for future holidays as the activity one I have booked isn't very MSE so the next holiday will have to be more low key.

Hi OP,

I did a similar thing last year, I went to Iceland on my own and I had a brilliant time! I am also a quiet person.

I always wanted to visit Iceland and as it is a small country – it was a good place to start baby steps Obviously it is quite the opposite of a beach/pool holiday but I highly recommend it!

I have now caught the travel bug and I am looking to do a long-haul holiday next year.

It is definitely worth travelling on your own – life is too short!

Good luck with the booking!

Lovetotravel

I've just come across your thread and really want to encourage you to travel alone. I'm around your age and last year I did Marrakech and a Vegas/San Diego road trip on my own and had a blast.

This year I have another Vegas/San D trip planned.

It's a bit scary at first, but you'll have a ball. And if you get lonely, there's always Tinder!!

Chlorine7

Hi, I posted over a year ago with a similar situation. I wanted to go to Korea and it would have been my first solo trip.

After umming and ahhing for months - I really pee'd off my colleague with my indecision I booked the flight. I had a minor panic after booking for about 24 hours but it was done.

I went for 8 nights to Seoul stayed in a hostel but my own room. I'm not exactly the social type and slightly out of the age-range of most travellers in my 30s) but I had such a good time. I had hoped to meet people at breakfast but I was so jet-lagged I always missed it so I pretty much spent the whole time alone.

I loved it! I ate street food 90% of the time which negated me sitting in a restaurant solo. I went for a specific meal in a restaurant where everything was Korean. I stood outside of a restaurant willing myself to go in when a man outside simply said the dish I was looking for and opened the door. I was on my own eating exactly what I wanted and noone paid attention to me what-so-ever.

I made a friend for an evening while on the DMZ tour. A few Koreans spoke to me so they could practice their English.

I've since been to Copenhagen, Split and Paris solo. There have been some trips I cancelled as I wasn't in the right frame of mind to go solo but doing this has bettered me.

I went Taiwan recently. Originally I was going alone but a friend booked to come with me. I wish I had gone solo - the freedom to do and eat exactly what you want outweighs the cost benefits of travelling with someone.

You'll be surprised at how many other solo people there are and more willing to initiate conversations even when you aren't. I'm naturally uptight so I have to work hard not to be constantly suspicious but the only place I never spoke to anyone was Copenhagen and that was cos I wasn't brave enough to talk to someone who was also clearly there on their own and staying in the same hotel.

tightasagnats

A few other possibilities:

workaway breaks where you do some kind of work in return for B&B and meet lots of interesting folks/save money

Neilson activity holidays have a "social table" at meals which is a great idea and attracts solo travellers as well as couples wanting to meet folks and you can sit there or not, depending on how you feel on the day - I didn't but friends I was with did. Also the activities (sailing/biking/tennis) mean you meet people and they don't know that you're travelling solo unless you tell them.

Walking Women holidays in the UK also do trips to Spain/Italy and are well led and organised and you can do your own thing if you want that

From what I hear eating out in the evening is tougher alone than lunchtime, but sitting in a tapas bar would be maybe more comfy than at a lone table if you're the kind to feel self conscious. Street food as someone else said is also a great idea and you'll feel part of things.

Tuesday_Tenor

Chlorine7 wrote: »

I went for 8 nights to Seoul
I've since been to Copenhagen, Split and Paris solo.
.

That's a lot of solo travelling for someone who didn't think they could!!

I remember your thread and am so glad you've had those good experiences and know you CAN do it!

Yes, you might not always want to; holidays with friends can be great, too. But as you say, you can feel less free. I holidayed with one friend a few years ago and was surprised how opposing our energy levels were: whenever I was flagging, she was raring to go, and vice versa. It'd never been as issue at home. She's still a good friend, but I'd probably not travel with her again. Am off for a walking holiday in 2 weeks, with friend of 40 years, and we know we'll be fine.

My attitude these days is to plan the sort of holiday I want, see if others want to do that and are free at the same time. If they do, we both/all go and it's usually great. If they don't I go alone, and it's also usually great!