Pet hate - being asked for a title

gunsandbanjos

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Why would you assume that someone whose title's Dr was a medical doctor?

I agree, very bizarre!

Most of my lecturers at university were Dr, failing that they were Prof.

Pollycat

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Why would you assume that someone whose title's Dr was a medical doctor?

Oh no!

I was going to ask Stephen Hawking if he'd take a look at my ingrowing toe nails.

Goldiegirl

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

It really bugs me too and I find it patronising.

Coming from a sales background, I see it for what it is, a well known sales technique to come across as your best mate, as in "see, I'm using your first name, I know you now, you and me are mates now". It's meant to make the customer feel more comfortable and at ease with you and a way to get them to trust you and therefore hopefully end up making a purchase.

I would never do it unless the customer mentioned to call them by their first name, and even then I wouldn't do it repeatedly as some sales associates do. I hate it when it's done to me as I find it patronising and I'm like "ok buddy, you're going abit OTT with the best buds routine now!" It actually works the other way with me and turns me off making a purchase. Maybe that's just because I can see right through the act.

I'm sure some people are just generally nice and friendly though and that is their way....but I don't like it.

If a salesperson calls me by my name too much, then I don't buy.

I haven't got a sales background or anything, but I know what they're up too!

pigpen

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

It really bugs me too and I find it patronising.

Coming from a sales background, I see it for what it is, a well known sales technique to come across as your best mate, as in "see, I'm using your first name, I know you now, you and me are mates now". It's meant to make the customer feel more comfortable and at ease with you and a way to get them to trust you and therefore hopefully end up making a purchase.

I would never do it unless the customer mentioned to call them by their first name, and even then I wouldn't do it repeatedly as some sales associates do. I hate it when it's done to me as I find it patronising and I'm like "ok buddy, you're going abit OTT with the best buds routine now!" It actually works the other way with me and turns me off making a purchase. Maybe that's just because I can see right through the act.

I'm sure some people are just generally nice and friendly though and that is their way....but I don't like it.

Not just you.. Like I already said in my conversation with a Next employee recently he used my name so much, almost every sentence I wanted to punch his face in and forcefully asked he stopped doing it because it was REALLY annoying.. in the end it annoyed me so much I cancelled my rather large order and shopped elsewhere.

It's not 'friendly' it's not pleasant and it makes me want to inflict physical harm upon them.. why does anyone need to use your name in conversation ever?? Do people not realise when others are talking to them?

Names are for the initial drawing attention once you have it why do you need to say it again? I really don't get it.

I've also had 'May I call you <first name>?' ... 'No, you don't need to use a name at all, I know who I am thank you!'

Pollycat

pigpen wrote: »

Not just you.. Like I already said in my conversation with a Next employee recently he used my name so much, almost every sentence I wanted to punch his face in and forcefully asked he stopped doing it because it was REALLY annoying.. in the end it annoyed me so much I cancelled my rather large order and shopped elsewhere.

It's not 'friendly' it's not pleasant and it makes me want to inflict physical harm upon them.. why does anyone need to use your name in conversation ever?? Do people not realise when others are talking to them?

Names are for the initial drawing attention once you have it why do you need to say it again? I really don't get it.

I've also had 'May I call you <first name>?' ... 'No, you don't need to use a name at all, I know who I am thank you!'

I wonder how much is down to company policy rather than the individual employee.

They probably wouldn't pepper a conversation with friends with their names every other word.

I may have missed it but I've not noticed this using of first names in shops.

I've read threads about people getting annoyed about being asked at the tills if you want choclate - usually £1 shops and WHS.
From employees of these shops, it appears it's company policy, not individual choice.
Indeed, not complying with the policy can lead to disciplinary action being taken.

pigpen

Pollycat wrote: »

I wonder how much is down to company policy rather than the individual employee.

They probably wouldn't pepper a conversation with friends with their names every other word.

I may have missed it but I've not noticed this using of first names in shops.

I've read threads about people getting annoyed about being asked at the tills if you want chocolate - usually £1 shops and WHS.
From employees of these shops, it appears it's company policy, not individual choice.
Indeed, not complying with the policy can lead to disciplinary action being taken.

I don't know, I've shopped at next for years and never had this before.. I've spoken to someone since and she didn't do it either.. I am a bit sensitive about name usage anyway as I hate my name and have an ongoing surname-saga which I'm sure everyone know already haha.

I've never been asked if I want chocolate though.. maybe they only ask skinny people they want to fatten up because they are jealous .. I would reply with 'if it's not in my basket I dont want it'

Pollycat

pigpen wrote: »

I don't know, I've shopped at next for years and never had this before.. I've spoken to someone since and she didn't do it either.. I am a bit sensitive about name usage anyway as I hate my name and have an ongoing surname-saga which I'm sure everyone know already haha.

I've never been asked if I want chocolate though.. maybe they only ask skinny people they want to fatten up because they are jealous .. I would reply with 'if it's not in my basket I dont want it'

Poundworld do it every time I've been in - sometimes chocolate, sometimes mints.

I've taken to saying 'No thanks to the chocolates' before she asks.

pigpen

Pollycat wrote: »

Poundworld do it every time I've been in - sometimes chocolate, sometimes mints.

I've taken to saying 'No thanks to the chocolates' before she asks.

I've never shopped there.. I may have to find one and test it out.. .. Just so I can say no or it would be in my basket hahaha.

Peter333

Bobcrowther wrote: »

Oh good, another feminazi wanting to erode our traditional values.
Same with religion, same with disabilities.
Soon we won't be able to say anything for fear of offending. We may as well all be grey homogenous blobs.
Sorry, that was offensive to non grey blobs of a different shape.

Oh good, another misogynistic male who thinks women should just sit down and look pretty and wait hand and foot on men and not speak unless they're spoken to, and never have an opinion of their own. Puts me in mind of this hilarious sketch from the Harry Enfield show.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS37SNYjg8w

Mojisola

Dill wrote: »

I don't think so, because that's just a shortening, which people do to words all the time, as opposed to coining a new word. Something that's easier to say or easier on the ears will catch on more quickly.

I think it's quite funny that you think that.

I think it's far more likely that there were plenty of comments -

"Missus? What this horrible new way of addressing a woman? What's wrong with Mistress? It's what we've been saying for generations!"

"Missus? That just sounds so strange. I'm never going to accept such an odd word!"

and so on.

It's such a shame that Ms has been around for so many years and yet people still treat it as if it's weird.