Getting married - no idea"

gabriel1980

I'm getting married. I asked, she said yes and now I have literally no idea where to start!


We've looked at a couple of places and one was over £5K for a marriage package and one was over £2K. Of course I'm not naïve enough to think that getting married would be cheap, but I guess I wasn't prepared for how expensive things would be.


I guess I'm looking for how much an average marriage should cost? I mean not like one when you elope or do it on the mega-cheap. but a nice wedding for about 30 guests (so a smallish wedding). What's a good rate for a venue? Prices for photographers, cakes, dresses etc etc.


Any help would be appreciated.

greenbee

It depends what kind of wedding you want. Friends have just had a fabulous wedding.

Reception in the village hall, which they decorated with their family the day before. Flowers from a wholesaler and arranged (and bouquet put together) themselves. Lots of fairy lights. Borrowed table cloths. Village hall crockery and cutlery and some glasses. Some glasses hired.

Like you, around 30 people, so food prepared at home (nibbles from waitrose, hot starter and maincourse, salad and cold pudding) and hot stuff reheated in village hall kitchen. One person paid to do washing up - guests helping serve and clear.

Cake made and donated by a guest (I've done this before where people have paid for ingredients and I've made the cake as my contribution and/or I've donated the entire thing, depending on the size and cost of ingredients), photography donated by another guest. Second hand dress altered by another guest. Wine, champagne etc as gifts from family.

Amazing wedding, low cost, and a real celebration by all their friends and family who felt really involved in the whole thing.

Pollycat

I think you might do well to post on the 'weddings' board.

Congratulations.

74jax

I got married back in 2013 and we budgeted 3k for ours.

I started a thread on the weddings board -https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3811691

Have a look on that board, there's loads of advice etc.

I'd say pick a figure you're both happy with and stick to it, as best you can.

onlyroz

For 30 people you could do a reception at home - do you have any relatives with a big living room and garden?

The wedding itself can be done for less than £500.

burlington6

Don't do what everyone seems to do no....try to out spend and be better than your friends.

The wedding is one day. The important thing is the two of you, not if you have a photo booth, sweet cart or the best venue.

Keep your money. Put it towards something worthwhile.

LilElvis

Work out what you can afford/ parents are prepared to contribute first. This will determine whether you're looking at a champers swilling bash at a five star hotel or a self-made buffet at a village hall. Then decide whether you want a church, registry office or a licenced venue for the actual ceremony.

Unless you're planning on getting married in the next couple of months take some time to relax and just mull things over between yourselves for a while.

… and congratulations!

pinkshoes

DH and I got just 24 days after deciding to end the never ending engagement!! (otherwise we never would have got round to it).

First step - church or registry office?

Second step - WHEN??

It is best to book the registry office/church first, then try and sort out a venue (especially at short notice).

Ours cost around £1000 which included rings, my dress, registry office fee, a sit down 3 course meal for 25 people, and a tab at the bar.

My cousin's wedding cost just that of the registry office, as she didn't tell any one other his and her sisters as witnesses!

A wedding can be as cheap or as expensive as you want it to be - it depends how rich you are and what your priorities in life are.

maman

Congratulations!


I'd suggest you sit down with your bride to be and make a list of 'must haves' for the wedding (things you've set your heart on) alongside other priorities in your life.


A wedding, although important, is only one day and the difference the money could make to your everyday life together whether it's towards a car, a house deposit or a lovely romantic holiday could be worth keeping the wedding day spending to a minimum.


How much you spend will depend on how much you're prepared to do yourself (or get family and friends to help) compared with what you pay others to do for you. If your priorities are a ceremony, some nice clothes and food and having your family and friends around you then there are heaps of ways you could achieve this without spending a fortune.

Gavin83

The cheapest wedding I've been to was £8k, the most expensive around £70k. I never really imagined it was possible to get married so cheaply to be honest.

skint_chick

We had 20 guests and it was an early evening ceremony so we could have photos then have dinner and a band, no additional evening do stuff. Total cost for ceremony and reception was around £1300 - that included hire of venue, ceremony, 3 course dinner, band, wine with dinner and free bar afterwards - since there was so few of us and by the time we finished dinner it was about 9pm. The rest was photographer, car (just a fancy private taxi service), wedding night hotel, dress, suits, bridesmaid etc. I made the favours and table decorations, we didn't have a cake. About £2,000 in total, I was married before so we wanted to pay for it ourselves as my dad paid last time and it was a lot more expensive. DH's parents gave us £1,000 towards it, my mum paid for my dress and my bridesmaids outfit, then my parents gave us £1,000 for our honeymoon. On the day my dad sneakily settled the reception bill while I was dancing with my friends.

There are lots of wedding planning websites etc with checklists, your first step is to decide when and where - venues book up well in advance. Pinterest has some great ideas for decorating venues/making favours/invitations etc which can be a fun way to spend time together and make sure your wife to be doesn't get too stressed out.