Lock changing

Skintski

Thank you. I think I really need to see a solicitor before I do anything else don't I. You're right that I don't want to inflame anything, things are stressful enough without making them worse.

It probably does sound like I'm being really cold, I'm not trying to do him out of anything, I just want it to be over and to keep my home. Like an idiot I've even offered to help him find somewhere pet friendly to live.

paddy's_mum

Alongside good, solid legal advice, you would also be well advised to get your sexual health checked out.

Sorry to add to your woes when you probably already feel battered by life but it is a sensible precaution given what your husband has been doing.

DUTR

paddy's_mum wrote: »

Alongside good, solid legal advice, you would also be well advised to get your sexual health checked out.

Sorry to add to your woes when you probably already feel battered by life but it is a sensible precaution given what your husband has been doing.

So are you saying the OP should now stress in case she is HIV positive? As ultimately that could be the case!
When in reality, I'm sure you know she is as clean as a whistle.

Person_one

paddy's_mum wrote: »

Alongside good, solid legal advice, you would also be well advised to get your sexual health checked out.

Sorry to add to your woes when you probably already feel battered by life but it is a sensible precaution given what your husband has been doing.

Unfortunately, this is very good advice.

Skintski

I'll get myself booked in. Thank you.

Mr.Generous

Skintski wrote: »

I'll get myself booked in. Thank you.

You sound like you have coped really well with an incredibly traumatic time, well done, get through it and life will get better. Good luck with everything.:beer:

rpc

Skintski wrote: »

It probably does sound like I'm being really cold, I'm not trying to do him out of anything, I just want it to be over and to keep my home. Like an idiot I've even offered to help him find somewhere pet friendly to live.

In so far as your dealings with him are concerned, that's what you need to do. There is sure to be a lot of emotion flying around, but the sooner you get him out of your life the better. Help him get somewhere else to live, get rid of his stuff, sort out a financial agreement. Then move on. You can't start to move on until you have separated your life from his.

You will go through stages of grief and anger at the same time, but that won't help you break the ties that still exist between you.

Skintski

Mr.Generous wrote: »

You sound like you have coped really well with an incredibly traumatic time, well done, get through it and life will get better. Good luck with everything.:beer:

Thank you. The best way of dealing with things for me at the moment is to keep my practical head on and think about what comes next and what I need to do. Every so often it gets the better of me and I know there's more of that to come.

Rpc, thanks for your advice. Much appreciated.

paddy's_mum

DUTR wrote: »

So are you saying the OP should now stress in case she is HIV positive? As ultimately that could be the case!
When in reality, I'm sure you know she is as clean as a whistle.

No, I am not saying that at all - YOU ARE!

Unfortunately, despite your assertion quoted above, neither you nor I nor the OP know the "reality" and taking care of her physical health is far too important to be put on hold.

This is one case where ignorance is not bliss and the sooner she gets checked, the sooner she will know the facts and can actually stop stressing about that particular aspect of this turmoil.

DUTR

paddy's_mum wrote: »

No, I am not saying that at all - YOU ARE!

Unfortunately, despite your assertion quoted above, neither you nor I nor the OP know the "reality" and taking care of her physical health is far too important to be put on hold.

This is one case where ignorance is not bliss and the sooner she gets checked, the sooner she will know the facts and can actually stop stressing about that particular aspect of this turmoil.

So the OP was 'unaware ' that the relationship was breaking down, and now they have to stress about the house , finances , health , pregnancy? Whilst some of you are trying to villify me (I'm not the ex by the way) It does read from my seat that you are collectively antagonising the OP and her situation.