Lock changing

Skintski

Hi all

I recently discovered my husband has been engaging in some extra curricular activities including the use of prostitutes. I've asked him to leave which he has having taken some of his stuff with him but leaving the majority including his dog (until he finds suitable accommodation). The house and mortgage are solely in my name as the house was mine before we met. He's paid 50% of the mortgage and bills since moving in just under five years ago. We've been married for just over two years. At what point am I legally allowed to change the locks please? I've no issue with him getting his stuff and pooch back but I want to ensure I'm on the premises at the time.

Thanks

Homeownertobe

You can change the locks now, as you own the house. However, he has a potentially significant financial interest in the house by virtue of the fact that he's your husband and he's been paying 50% for years. As you've lived together for five years, there's a high probability your marriage will be seen as a long one and therefore the starting point will be a 50/50 split, regardless of the fact you've only been married two years. Having said all this you should probably take legal advice asap.

Skintski

I intend to do so thank you. My head has been full of junk the last few days. I gather the first step is a separation agreement.

rpc

He probably has matrimonial rights to reside in the property. You cannot simply boot him out without his agreement (which you would probably be advised to get in writing). I would speak to a solicitor - he has occupation rights and a financial interest in the property so this could get messy.

This forum has been through this a few times (usually from the perspective of a woman who is being chucked out).

See:
https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/relationships/relationship-problems/relationship-breakdown-and-housing/if-you-re-married-or-in-a-civil-partnership-relationship-breakdown-and-housing/if-you-re-married-or-in-a-civil-partnership-and-you-own-your-home-relationship-breakdown-and-housing/relationship-breakdown-and-housing-rights-to-stay-if-your-spouse-or-civil-partner-owns-the-home/

https://www.gov.uk/stay-in-home-during-separation-or-divorce/overview

CAB wrote:

Home rights include the right:

to stay in your home and not be excluded, unless a court order prevents you from being there

Skintski

He agreed to leave, he has also said he won't be claiming the house since it wasn't really his to claim. Whether this will change once he's taken advice, who knows.

Due to his recent activities he had no savings where as I do. I'm hoping to reach an agreement where by he can take the savings with him (probably in the region of about 6k) if he leaves the house alone. The money will allow him to place a deposit on a rental property. I'm hoping to initially set this out myself with a view to a solicitor organising this as an official separation agreement ASAP. He also hopes that I will not spill the beans to family and friends on what he has been up to, this isn't something I've been blackmailing him with but I know it's what he hopes for so it may help my case.

Money_maker

You have my sympathies Skintski. You also do not need to answer any questions about the end of your relationship, this is purely for some to revel in as its obviously gone past the stage of fixing.

Skintski

Thank you Money maker. I just think that's a particularly spiteful thing to post from DUTR. All I want to do is get advice on how to protect the home I've worked hard for. It's that kind of post that puts you off using the forum given that the situation is painful enough as it is.

DUTR

Skintski wrote: »

Trust me, I'm seriously ashamed of him. As for why he strayed, I'm not really sure how that's relevant to my questions but you'd have to ask him.....

As changing the locks when he has already agreed to leave just seems to be adding to drama, from what you have written it doesn' appear he feels ashamed of what he has done. People have different priorities in relationships, at present it doesn't seem like he will re-enter the property with the exisiting keys.

Money_maker wrote: »

You have my sympathies Skintski. You also do not need to answer any questions about the end of your relationship, this is purely for some to revel in as its obviously gone past the stage of fixing.

The OP has my sympathies too (along with her hubby) , I agree sadly it has perhaps gone past repair, for whatever reasons it's always a shame when a relationship breaks down.

Marktheshark

A local joiner or handyman will be cheaper to change locks of you are not DIY expert, you only need a locksmith if you have a locked door with no keys.

DUTR

Skintski wrote: »

Thank you Money maker. I just think that's a particularly spiteful thing to post from DUTR. All I want to do is get advice on how to protect the home I've worked hard for. It's that kind of post that puts you off using the forum given that the situation is painful enough as it is.

It wasn't posted through spite, as we all know when it comes to relationships one hat doesn't fit all.
I agree you should protect your home of which you have worked hard for, many of us have that fear, yet some are labelled misogynist.

rpc

Skintski wrote: »

He agreed to leave, he has also said he won't be claiming the house since it wasn't really his to claim. Whether this will change once he's taken advice, who knows.

And this is why you need to take advice and action to protect yourself. Legally, the house is partly his to claim on - he may or may not realise this.

Anyway, you can legally change the locks any time you choose. It becomes more questionable if you take further steps to deny him access. Equally, he can change the locks (or call a locksmith if he finds himself locked out). If he has moved out voluntarily, he can lose that right of entry but it would be easy for him to claim that he fled quickly in fear of violence or similar and point to the remaining belongings and dog as evidence. With only a verbal agreement, you have little to support your position.

In your place, I probably wouldn't change the locks but I might get a simple alarm installed... If things are proceeding amicably given the circumstances then don't take steps that may inflame things. It will be simpler (and cheaper!) if you can agree a settlement with him. You do need to be somewhat cold and objective to deal with the financial side effectively and keep the emotional side of what has happened separate.