large booking at restaurant- how to split the bill?

duchy

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I don't need a plate of food in front of me to enjoy their company. But if I have agreed to meet them to eat, then I expect them to eat.

So if they were feeling unwell, not so bad they needed to stay home but couldn't face food.....you'd prefer them to cancel solely because they'd be sipping water or Coke whilst you ate and that to you isn't socially acceptable?

Quite thankful my friends don't have such high expectations of me but just enjoy my company.

Georgiegirl256

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I don't have a problem with that. It's the person with the tiny plate and glass of water I have trouble with, because it seems to me that they do not want to eat, so why have they come?
.

But if their happy with it then surely that should be enough? Like you said earlier, it's your problem not theirs, and you're obviously judging it to be a problem where one doesn't even exist.

Surely if they didn't really want to be there then they would go?

silvercar

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Yes, we do that too. All I'm saying is that IF I was with a crowd of people all eating, I would not want to be the one with the empty plate and the glass of water. To me that is not joining in with the activity - like I said above, it's like going to the cinema with a bunch of friends but only watching 1/4 of the film.

But that's only mho.

..and then saying you only want to pay a 1/4 of the bill!

Part of the joy of the evening is the company/ service etc but some people want to divide up the cost only according to the food consumed.

For the last 20 years I can't remember dividing up the food according to who eat what. We choose the restaurant based on what people want to pay and then split the bill equally (unless it is a family meal with children).

Georgiegirl256

silvercar wrote: »

..and then saying you only want to pay a 1/4 of the bill!

Part of the joy of the evening is the company/ service etc but some people want to divide up the cost only according to the food consumed.
.

Do you not feel guilty that people subsidise your meal for you? Why won't you pay the full amount yourself?

moneyistooshorttomention

missbiggles1 wrote: »

What do you expect people to eat when they go out for dinner?

Personally - I'm someone that tends to just have one course (occasionally two) and my main course isnt a meat one - and therefore I would almost certainly end up subsidising other people if a bill was split equally- and that's simply not fair.

On the other hand - if I am feeling particularly hungry and spot some particularly expensive choices I fancy - then the fact that a bill is being paid according to what one has (ie rather than split equally) means I can have exactly what I please in good conscience (ie because no-one else would be put in the position of having to pay towards the expensive choices I had made on that particular occasion).

silvercar

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Do you not feel guilty that people subsidise your meal for you? Why won't you pay the full amount yourself?

People aren't subsidising my meal. What gave you that idea?

Georgiegirl256

silvercar wrote: »

People aren't subsidising my meal. What gave you that idea?

Just by these comments off you -

."..and then saying you only want to pay a 1/4 of the bill!

Part of the joy of the evening is the company/ service etc but some people want to divide up the cost only according to the food consumed."

If someone has had less than you but still pays the same amount as you then they are subsidising you.

missbiggles1

onlyroz wrote: »

I asked yo before but you never answered - why do you need a plate of food in front of you to enjoy your friend's company? And why does it diminish your own enjoyment of your meal if the person with you isn't eating?

Not that you're asking me but....

I can enjoy a friend's company with plates of food in front of us or I can do it just as well without - however I find it very awkward to go out for a meal with someone and sit and eat while they either stare at my food, stare at me while I'm eating or try to avoid doing either.

I don't know why this is so difficult to understand.

Pollycat

boliston wrote: »

I find a good tip for group meals (eg with work colleagues etc) is to take a quick snap of the bill with your phone as you can then calculate your share without feeling "rushed". I normally then pay my exact share (including 10% tip if service was good!) on a card as i don't normally carry much cash so having your own e-copy of the bill makes this much easier.

Lordy! Lordy!
If I felt I had to do this when I went out for a meal, I'd change my social circle.

missbiggles1

PasturesNew wrote: »

Physically, I've not grown since I was 10. I'm considered quite diminutive. As I've aged I've found my appetite has reduced.

I couldn't keep up, volume-wise, with somebody who was (say) a 30-40 year old, 6'-6'4" rugby playing fella, weighing twice what I do ..... and why should I?

I'd be there because somebody asked. I go pretty much everywhere I'm asked as it's so very rare I have to accept and go. That's why I'd be there: somebody asked.

3 months into 2016 and I've met/spoken to just one other human being this year, on two occasions. I kind of like to be invited places

There's someone in my book group who doesn't eat (at all) during the day - she complains that nobody invites her round (or out) for lunch and can't understand why this is the case.

Sometimes you just have to go with the flow or be prepared to be a loner. (Happily for me, I can exist being either.)