Tenants in Common with Mother + Dispute over division of property

auntyrara

You should start using the downstairs kitchen again and tell her that you will use the upstairs kitchen once she has moved her bedroom into a downstairs room, as you agreed. You might annoy her enough for her to do it

jtprobs

fairy_lights wrote: »

So if she's taken up one of the upstairs bedrooms but is not using it, where does she sleep? In another downstairs bedroom? If so, can't you just move one of your children in to one of the rooms she's not using when she goes out?

she is sleeping in that upstairs room..

jtprobs

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I am wondering what the exact size of this house and its attendant garden are. I am assuming its quite a small house? I assume her half share (ie downstairs) has two reception rooms (one for a bedroom for her and one for a sitting room for her) and THE kitchen (which she is being the sole user of).

It would be interesting to know how many rooms mother has for herself (excluding the bedroom she is in illictly).

I am also wondering about "off the wall" ideas like a "garden office" in the garden (OP's half) to help out a bit with room. I dont know how much of a goer that idea would be....planning permission and money wise...

we have two half rooms (diagonally cut my the roof) ( /|\ ) which are probably equal in total size to the bedroom she has kept upstairs.

Then we have one lounge, one bathroom - which she shares, and the kitchen.
Mother uses our bathroom, and has a double lounge downstairs - which as you said, one half could easily be used as a bedroom - they are the biggest, and tallest rooms in the house.
She also has large kitchen/dinning area, with a small kitchen at the back (cooker, sink); plus an a large extension - but it needs a lot of work done, leaky roof.

moneyistooshorttomention

Then maybe "tit for tat" - of we will use THE kitchen (ie hers) unless and until she stop using your bedroom and telling her she cant use the bathroom. After all - she can always do a strip wash in the sink in THE kitchen. As for going to the loo = her problem (dont know if the house still has an outside loo?). Not having a proper indoor loo to use might concentrate her mind wonderfully at stopping her squatting in your bedroom.:cool:

Or - could you squat in her extension/mend its roof and tell her thats how it will be until she stops squatting in your bedroom?

FBaby

she is sleeping in that upstairs room..

Sorry but why are you not moving her stuff to the bedroom downstairs (assume there is one?). Tell her that you will do just that if she hasn't moved by X date, and if she hasn't, wait until she has gone to do her errands and move everything.

Ultimately, neither of you has a right over that bedroom, so it's fighting over it or selling.

sleepymans

Its in the past, I realise, but why oh why would you compromise your family's future in this way by paying off your Mothers debts????
Please please, promise never to spend another £ on her (gambling) debts!! Its obvious people who expect (and are successful) in getting others to pay off their debts will NEVER take responsibility for their own actions!!

You really need to be much more assertive.

You have weight of numbers on your side....just as she has taken actions freely in the house you share, without legal consequences, then so can you. Take possession of the rooms as you agreed with her and if necessary use locks and keys to enforce this.

In the fullest of time, make plans for alternative accommodation for your family, even if you have to rent elsewhere.....then just sit back and wait for all her debtors come chasing her....the house will eventually have to be sold to repay HER debts (from her part share) and you can realise your capital share. Either that or she will leave this world and you will gain possession of your share by natural means.

In the mean time, have nothing to do with the evil bat. You sound a good hearted soul and you WILL eventually prevail.\I wish you much luck for the future.

Sleepy

Cheeky_Monkey

I totally agree with Sleepy :beer:

You need to get that piece of **** out of your lives as soon as possible before she wrecks your relationship with your wife/partner.

If I could possibly afford it, I would even go so far as to forego my 'share' of the property by moving out and not paying a penny towards it. She can then have the whole house in which to rot whilst you will have a much less stressful and happier life, even if in rented.

moneyistooshorttomention

Perhaps thats the best solution then - ie rent someplace else for your family. Making sure you've got it legally tied-up that when the house gets sold you get your half share before anyone else gets anything from it (ie see a solicitor to make sure she cant steal your half share).

Maybe locking up your rooms (and yes I would include the bedroom she is squatting in) quite firmly - padlock the lot.

I presume that its down there on the Register entry for the house that you are part-owner of it okay?? - ie it would be difficult for her to sell it without your consent and impossible for any buyer not to give you your share come the time.

With her being the only one living in the house - then I presume it would be all the easier for her creditors to force a sale of the house on her (ie because of no-one else living there - so their only obligation would pretty much boil down to making sure you get your money before they could start divvying up her half share between them).

True that it must be putting a heck of a strain on your relationship - not to mention your health from sleeping on the floor. As children come into the equation - it is important to try and ensure your marriage stays intact.

That does raise the problem of having to pay rent unnecessarily - ie because of her attitude. I wonder if there's any way to get her to contribute towards that rent - because a move out would be down to her "unreasonable behaviour"??? Hopefully you wouldnt have to wait long before her creditors come after her - and she has to agree a sale of the house anyway - so not having to pay that unnecessary rent for long?? Hmmm...though you could always have a word with her creditors and tell them you were out of the house and wouldnt stand in their way if they went after her.....

parkrunner

When you mother is out, break into her room and swap everything with the smaller room downstairs and fit a new lock. And how on earth can she take full control of the gardens? Someone needs to man up in the property.

LannieDuck

I'm not sure about locks inside - as she's a joint owner of the property, she could probably pay someone to come and remove them.

But is there anything to stop you installing a swing set in the garden for your kids to play with?