Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

Torry_Quine

Pyxis Thanks so much for your kind words. I've had little sleep tonight so phoned Samaritans just to hear a voice. I'm in so much pain from loosing him, it feels like I can never get over this.

Pyxis

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Pyxis Thanks so much for your kind words. I've had little sleep tonight so phoned Samaritans just to hear a voice. I'm in so much pain from loosing him, it feels like I can never get over this.

It's an injury. It will hurt and hurt like anything for a very long time, but gradually it will heal. There will always be a scar, though.

Unfortunately, unlike a physical pain, analgesics on't work.


I'm glad you phoned Samaritans. That's just what they're there for.

Torry_Quine

I managed to make an appointment to see a counsellor at the local cancer support centre for Friday morning. It won't be easy going there for the first time since he's gone but they are the experts in this area.

seven-day-weekend

Torry, shout and scream at God as much as you like, he is big enough to take it. It's all part of grieving. I agree with others that it is too soon to have structure in your life, just do what you need to even if it is cry and howl all day.

As others have said, do try to eat,even if it is seven or eight tiny nibbles a day.

Glad you are seeing the Counsellor xx

Pyxis

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I managed to make an appointment to see a counsellor at the local cancer support centre for Friday morning. It won't be easy going there for the first time since he's gone but they are the experts in this area.

Torry, you are so doing the right things.

You feel you need help/or to talk, so you go for it....Samaritans, Cancer Support group. That's good.

I think someone also mentioned Cruse, which is specifically for bereaved people, I believe. Not just spouses, either. I've heard very good things about them.

I'm also glad you can come on here and talk, too. :A

Torry_Quine

Just back from the GP. I'm to keep taking the sleeping tablets every second night. Going back next week, she seems concerned and was pleased I'd got an appointment with the support centre. Said that if I need to cry that's totally alright but I must eat.

I'm exhausted so hopefully will get some sleep tonight.

Pyxis

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Just back from the GP. I'm to keep taking the sleeping tablets every second night. Going back next week, she seems concerned and was pleased I'd got an appointment with the support centre. Said that if I need to cry that's totally alright but I must eat.

I'm exhausted so hopefully will get some sleep tonight.

Are your friends still attending to you? I'm thinking whether one or two of them could keep you supplied with small tasty meals.
When my neighbour's husband died, years ago now, I'd make a little bit extra for our evening meal, and take her round a portion when I'd cooked it. She didn't have the energy to think of food, but she said that when she smelled the dish I brought, it woke up a bit of appetite, and she was pleased.
I think I did that for about three or four weeks.

Pity you aren't near me.

Torry_Quine

Pyxis wrote: »

Are your friends still attending to you? I'm thinking whether one or two of them could keep you supplied with small tasty meals.
When my neighbour's husband died, years ago now, I'd make a little bit extra for our evening meal, and take her round a portion when I'd cooked it. She didn't have the energy to think of food, but she said that when she smelled the dish I brought, it woke up a bit of appetite, and she was pleased.
I think I did that for about three or four weeks.

Pity you aren't near me.

Thanks that's sweet. A friend is taking me out tomorrow afternoon for a coffee. It will get me out of the house for a while. Spoke to my brother last night, I'd literally nipped to the toilet and came back to a message from him. I had to call him straight away to hear his voice.

dandy-candy

Torry I was really close to my mum, she was literally my best friend. We saw each other every week and spoke on the phone 4-5 times a day, we used to watch the same TVs dramas and phone each other in the commercial breaks to discuss what had happened and what we thought would happen next, then rush off to keep watching and call again at the next ad break.

When she died it blew a hole through me and I just couldn't function or stop crying. It took a long time to drag myself back to anything near normal, but when I was really in despair I did think to myself "what would mum say if she saw me now?" I would literally have a conversation in my head imagining everything she would say and I would answer, and it was actually quite comforting and I truly believe they are still with us. It helped me keep going because I wouldn't want her to be upset seeing me in such a state. My mum was such a happy fun person and we had a laugh whenever we were together. I still talk to her now, and thinking about her doesn't make me cry anymore.

geminilady

dekaspace I can understand how hard it is to have noisy neighbours. Not the same thing but someone has bought the flat next to mine to rent out and they are renovating it.I have had constant noise all day for weeks and am sure it is affecting my mood as I have started feeling quite low.At least I know there will be and end to it unless the neighbours from hell rent it.