Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

Georgiegirl256

Flybaby wrote: »

a point I thought was interesting from hubby (before I stopped talking to him!).............
When he says "I'm hungry" - he means just that.........and if he wanders out to kitchen - an apple or bowl of yoghurt is the same as crisps or chocolate to him. I explained to him that when I say "I'm hungry" it means I want a particular food like bread, kebab or chips and suggestions of "there is yoghurt in the fridge" seem ridiculous to me.
Is that a male vs female thing?
....)

No, not at all (IMO anyhow), it just means he's hungry and that is what he fancies. Different peoples taste buds crave different things. Most of the time I crave salty savoury things so will reach for crisps etc, but now and again I'll still feel hungry and reach for a yoghurt or some fruit. Depends what I feel like at the time.

Personally I don't eat if I'm not hungry. If you're reaching for crisps, bread etc and saying your hungry but you're not really hungry, then you're not hungry IYSWIM?!

If it is a male/female thing, then I think I've got a more male brain than a female one anyhow!

SingleSue

I'm with you Georgiegirl....apparently I annoy the boys when they say they are hungry and I reply with "Well there is stuff in the kitchen"

Yes there is stuff in the kitchen but it is not the right kind of stuff they were thinking about when they said they were hungry. I usually end up completely dumbfounded because to me, they are hungry, there is stuff in the kitchen, solution is to eat said stuff in kitchen and not be hungry anymore. To them, the solution is to go out and get stuff that they were thinking about when they said they were hungry.

Cue lots of tantrums because I then refuse to go out to get desired stuff and just repeat the "There is stuff in the kitchen to eat rather than waste money getting more stuff"

codemonkey

I think here we're talking less about hunger and more about being hungry for a particular food type. If you're properly hungry, you'll eat what's there. If you're hungry for crisps then and you only have apples, you won't bother.

I think one of the biggest problems with food in this country (aside from our ever increasing sedentary lifestyles) is that we're not conditioned to feel actual hunger. Food is readily available at all times and diets encourage you to snack so you don't feel hungry. So very few people really understand the difference between actual hunger or boredom or being thirsty or just wanting a snack.

SingleSue

If I am hungry for a particular food item, I generally say "Ooh, I really fancy a choccie bar" or something like that. If I say I am hungry, then anything will do.

To me it's not difficult but according to the boys, I am missing the point. My view is that they are missing the point, if they want a particular item, then say you want a particular item.

In reality, none of us are right, it's down to how we process and then verbalise, what seems logical to one person may not be logical to another.

onomatopoeia99

If I say I'm hungry, it means I'm hungry. If I reach for the biscuit tin at work then I'm almost certainly not hungry, I just fancy a biscuit (and that's a habit I need to break).

If anyone wants me, l'll probably be watching the snooker

tea_lover

Crucible time ono!!!!

calleyw

Afternoon Shipmates,

Hugs,squishes and handshakes all round.

I did cry last night, but it was for how I am allowing my anxiety to rule me. How when people don't reply my texts I think really stupid things like they hate me etc. And how it ruined a relationship because I went off on one every time because of. And I am just so ashamed of what I did and how I hurt myself and my ex because of it.

I have come to the conclusion that I pick people who don't want a relationship to protect myself. I am chatting to one man at the moment. Seems nice but I don't want to met him as he wants a relationship. Also he works for my uncle. So could be a bit sticky.

Any way need to get dressed and think about collecting my dress.

Yours

Calley

Waves_and_Smiles

Aw, big hugs Calley. That is quite a thing to realise. There are lots of people who have been previously hurt really badly who are stuck between two sides of a coin, on the one hand they really want to love and be loved (who doesn't?), but at the same time are terrified of being hurt again so they choose people that it would never work out with to keep themselves safe from further hurt. There is this constant push and pull situation, wanting something desperately but being too scared of it failing to try. So they have these little relationships instead that are hopeless but alleviate a little of the loneliness, which then of course go wrong confirming that they were going to hurt again after all. It is a very painful circle, have another hug.

I find it very hard if people don't reply to me too. Be it in email, texts or on forums, particularly if I am already feeling shaky and upset. It can make me feel very rejected and as if all of my bad thoughts about how worthless I am, how pointless I am and how generally horrid I am are true. It doesn't take much to get the old self-hatred tapes playing. All we can do is remind ourselves that we are worthwhile, that other people have things going on in their lives and sometimes that people simply mess up! We all do!

calleyw

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

I find it very hard if people don't reply to me too. Be it in email, texts or on forums, particularly if I am already feeling shaky and upset. It can make me feel very rejected and as if all of my bad thoughts about how worthless I am, how pointless I am and how generally horrid I am are true. It doesn't take much to get the old self-hatred tapes playing. All we can do is remind ourselves that we are worthwhile, that other people have things going on in their lives and sometimes that people simply mess up! We all do!

WaS,

thanks for the hugs.

I think all sorts of things. and then i get very agitated and with my ex would go see if I could see him. yes I know very bad and stupid thing to do.

I know deep down that they are busy etc. but it just starts to eat away at me. if they have issues I want to help and support them and then get very frustrated when they wont. I feel they are shutting me out and don't like or trust me.

I still have a lot of work to do on that.

yours

Calley

mellymoo74

Calley I may have mentioned this to you before, Google the cinderella complex that's it's name.
Xxx

WaS xx
Fly xx

Not joining I the hungry conversation for obvious reasons

We are having Chicken Quesadillas today just working out the cost per head.

Eta 76p