Shopaholics Anonymous (sort of!)

iwanttobreakfree

Adrasteia01 wrote: »

I've noticed that shopping can be addictive if you do a lot of it in a short space of time. If you hold off for a while you should hopefully break out of the 'mad shopping urge'.

Tamara

Hi Tamara

sorry a bit thick but can you explain this in dummy terms for me lol!

red74

I think I know what Andrasteia01 is getting at. I've had a couple of falls off the debt-free wagon over the past couple of years. One major one was a friend's wedding a couple of years ago. I'd been doing pretty well, had a spending diary and a budget each month that I was keeping to - but then I needed to get a dress for this wedding, and shoes, and make-up (which I could probably have managed without), and some jewellery (again, wasn't really a necessity). All this in itself was bad enough, but even after I had all this and the wedding had happened - I just couldn't stop spending. I blew the budget for a good couple of months after that on clothes, jewellery and yet more bl**dy cosmetics I didn't need.

Eventually I got a rather large credit card bill that gave me a bit of a shock, enough at least to stop me spending for a couple of weeks. After that the compulsion kind of went back in the closet somewhat (I wouldn't say it went away because it's always there just waiting for an excuse).

Adrasteia01

Red: That's kind of what I meant, yeah.

It's like if you shop a lot in a short space of time, you kind of get into a shopping habit.. then if you don't spend for a while it kind of settles down and you feel more controlled.

A few yrs back I got robbed (my jewellery was taken) and got almost 2k payout from the insurance company. I went on a big, big spending spree and I just know I was addicted there for a while, I was so driven to keep finding things good enough to buy that would be nice and now I wish I'd just held off on spending all of the money.

I find if you get into a money saving frame of mind it's easier to stick with it, and if you get into a spending frame of mind, it takes a while to get out of it until you establish more control.

Ches

I always seem to have a mental list of things I actually need. For instance this winter I will need a pair of black boots (old ones chucked because they were so uncomfortable) because I won't be able to wear some of my skirts without them (they look horrible with shoes) and I need a couple of polo neck jumpers (1 white and 1 black) to wear under my jackets. I think its because I need (in my head) to look as good as I can. (yes I know I am fat and in my 60's but its all relative) My home is the same I cannot bear to have anything that looks shabby. My wardrobe has lots of 'perfect' outfits' 'perfectly' stored. My cupboards are all 'perfectly' tidy. Funny enough both with clothes and household stuff I never care how old it is as long as it still looks good and doesn't look shabby. There is always a reason to spend but I know I don't really want for anything. BTW I do spend less than my friends who shop without a plan.

teacup_2

Hi just wanted to drop in and say hi, yes me too can be a bit spendy too sometimes, quite good if I visit this board and read posts etc, it motivates me, Prior to this I would have a weekly trip to town and but clothes, bags and whatever. I dont neeed them its like I just add to my wardrobe all the time. I knew I must stop because in my wardrobe their were items hanging up still with the tags on, not worn. Sometimes I would take things back if receipt still within 28 days. The worse thing was I couldnt afford them and it was a case of buy now , think later. I would vow to stay away from town and then , it was like I was taken over by aliens, I would find my self in town , looking at clothes etc. I find it easiest if I dont go into town as this always seems to be my spending magnet place.
Now though I am different I buy something on average once every 3 months, dont need it but WANT IT !!.. I am using all my body lotions etc and miracle age creams from my drawer and all those shampoos etc that promise hair like silk !. So not buyong anything at moment , just going to car boot sale and I actually prefer a spend at a car boot sale !. I bought a bag from new look for 50p and I remember when it was £9.99 because I liked it ( see it was destined to be with me !!):T . Also sometimes I think there are reasons to why we spend, yes becausse we want to, but also because it makes us feel good (in short term ), also some people fall into the trap of relentless buying because you are used to spending as a pastime.Everyone is different though, if i needed cheering up I would go and buy myself something new, also we feel nice in something new too.but saying that I like a charity shop find too at a twentieth of the price!!.
But i feel good knowing finances are in order and I get a good feeling resisting buying anything too .

supersavershal

Hi my name is shal and im a shopaholic:eek:

I have it under control at the moment but is always there lurking in the background.I also live with a spendaholic but im trying to break free.

I sometimes go to online shopping for clothes, stuff etc and fill a basket.I take my time and choose stuff I really want put sizes in and everything but I dont complete the transaction.It feeds my addiction (for a short time) without breaking the bank.In the past I would add to basket, pay and have it delivered on special 24hr delivery, so Iv come on a bit.

ixwood

I think it must be connected to insecurity. All the "you're worth it" crap on TV adverts doesn't help, as well as them intentionally trying to make people feel rubbish unless they've got the latest "must have".

Shopping isn't even fun IMO. I never get how it's become a leisure activity. The act itself is a painful, boring, chore most of the time IMO.

Can you keep yourself busy with something else? There's millions of more fun things to do.

ixwood

btw, all the lotions, potions and new wonder ingredients blatently make no difference and are just rip off marketing.

Drink plenty of water, do some exercise, eat and sleep well and be happy. That'll work much better than any magic potion.

teacup_2

thats right i try and drink 6 - 8 glasses of water a day and wear sun protection factor cream to keep skin safe :beer:

marksandsparksgal

I can SO sympathise....when I was at work (quit last week to go travelling), since everything was 20% off...the amount of stuff I have (esp. underwear) is stupid. Hoping that going away for a few months will help as I will have:

1: nowhere to store clothes
2: no money to buy them!