Left The House In My Late Mum's Will But My Sisters Refuse To Sell It-HELP!

candlelight_2013

Ann I have read this thread from the beginning although I haven't posted a comment.

You have been given excellent advice by people trying to help you. I appreciate you are not well, but in your title you say HELP, and that is what posters have been trying to do, help you.

Many posters have asked how do you know your sisters don't want to sell the house, and no where on this thread do you explain this. Are you guessing, is it because they don't speak to you or has someone told you?

Just because posters are not telling you what you want to hear you don't believe them or indeed your Solicitor. They really want to save you money and stress and you seem not to be prepared to listen.

It doesn't matter how often you repeat the facts, if they were correct in your first post, then nothing has changed.

As has been said many times, you need to be patient. I had to sell my Mum's home after she died and that took several months, I did employ a Solicitor to deal with the estate which was shared between myself and my sister. Everyone understood it would take time, and I will say it took a while for us to clear Mum's home before we put it up for sale. We were very lucky because she kept it in a good state of repair so nothing major to do. Do you actually know if your Mum's home will need any repairs or such like before it is put up for sale? If it does, and your sisters don't attend to this, then the property might have to be sold for a lesser price.

Please try not to become stressed as that won't be good for you. As the old saying goes "everything comes to he who waits"

Take care

Candlelightx

jouef

candlelight_2013 wrote: »

As the old saying goes "everything comes to he who waits"

... minus of course professional fees and court costs, and not including sums or items 'hidden' from probate, or anything successfully defended as not recoverable. So while you're waiting, I strongly suggest building the evidence for a case to claim what your sisters might try to avoid handing over to you.

Tiredandemotional

Ann, just wanted to give you an idea of how long it takes to get ready to sell a house in these circumstances.


My mother died in October 2015. My sister and I started clearing the house immediately. My mother was very organised and there was no "crap" in the house. There is no-one living there, the d!cor is immaculate and it is in excellent repair, so very little work to do. No-one is deliberately delaying the process.


Even so, the house was only ready to go on the market last week and we will consider ourselves lucky if the sale process completes within the next 3 or 4 months.


Originally, I thought we could have the house on the market within a few weeks, but it wasn't until we got started that I realised that there was a lot more to it that I thought and that my expectations had been unrealistic.


As others have said, I wouldn't worry that there is an unreasonable delay yet. When dealing with a loved ones estate, patience is not only a virtue but a necessity.

jouef

Tiredandemotional wrote: »

... patience is not only a virtue but a necessity.

Annbarbs, since I asked for the fourth time in post 142, other posters have picked up that the question 'If you have no contact with your sisters, how do you know what they intend to do?' is key to your predicament; depending on the answer, wait-and-see could be either the best or the worst thing to do.

Your sisters' legal responsibility is to execute and administer your mother's estate in the interests of the beneficiaries. If they do not do this properly, or are not fit, there are two possibilities. Firstly, they could be removed as reps (personal representatives, ie executors and administrators) by a court - this could be done now, and the court would appoint a replacement. Secondly, their distribution of the estate could be challenged in court - this would be done after they finish, and they could be ordered by the court to pay a wronged beneficiary their inheritance. In both cases, the court would decide who pays the legal costs. Note that if you won but your sisters had no assets left after costs, you could receive nothing - this is one way a whole estate can be swallowed up in legal costs.

These are a civil law matters, which means the court bases its decision on precedent - how previous courts have decided similar cases - and will seek to put the wronged party in the position they should have been in. So for example if the court decides your sisters should have given you £10,000 but did not, they might order them to pay you £10,000 plus interest plus your legal costs. They will not order any changes where the parties simply do not talk to each other or do not agree. There has to be clear evidence that the reps intend to be, or have been, unfit.

Of course there is a third possibility - your sisters do it properly, having been warned off attempting misconduct by your solicitor's attention. I suspect this is what your solicitor expects to happen and is what they are charging you for. But your solicitor will not know if your mother had any assets (eg a joint account with one of them, a valuable item or loose cash) your sisters might have kept for themselves and hidden from probate, unless you find and give them this information. Your solicitor will not know if your sisters have said or done something that shows they are unfit, unless you find and give them this information. This is the information for which we have asked about the evidence. If you have this evidence, use it now. You might not have to go to court - you or your solicitor could ask for running accounts of the estate to compare with what should be happening and that may be enough to keep your sisters in line. If you do not have evidence, collect it now before it is too late to find it - post 152 suggests how to approach this.

I hope this will show that worrying about your sisters' intentions and planning where to invest your inheritance will get you nowhere at this stage. There is work you could be doing, while also securing the emotional support that will help you keep up. As already stated, mine is not professional advice so check it out.

Robin9

Tiredandemotional wrote: »

Ann, just wanted to give you an idea of how long it takes to get ready to sell a house in these circumstances.



As others have said, I wouldn't worry that there is an unreasonable delay yet. When dealing with a loved ones estate, patience is not only a virtue but a necessity.

add into the equation the daughter who has lived in the family home, cared for her mother, and now might have nowhere to live - she needs time to explore the options for her own future.

System

Annbarbs, since I asked for the fourth time in post 142, other posters have picked up that the question 'If you have no contact with your sisters, how do you know what they intend to do?' is key to your predicament; depending on the answer, wait-and-see could be either the best or the worst thing to do.

Because after I told my sisters solicitor that I do not want my sister to live in the house and that it must be sold and also confirmed this in writing to them.
But my sisters phoned me and tried to talk me into changing my mind but I said NO Sister A cannot live in the house it must be sold.
And I did explain to my sisters why and I also told them in my emails to them.

The sister that is living in the house was nasty to me and said she is not leaving the house. But the other sisters did not seem to upset and just said she had hoped I would let my sisters stay but if not she will help my sister find somewhere else to live but she does not want to sell only because she has to.

At the moment my solicitor is corresponding with my sister by writing and talking to my sisters solicitor not writing to my sisters.
Since my sisters solicitors are acting on behalf of my sisters.
But if my sister are no longer using a solicitor and are now dealing with the estate themselves then my solicitor will write to my sisters.

My solicitor is still waiting for a response from my sisters solicitor to find this out but they have not answered his letter. So he is still awaiting a reply from my sisters solicitors.
So we still don't know if or not my sisters are still with their solicitor or are dealing with the estate without one.

Yes my solicitor will try to resolve the problem by writing to my sisters solicitors and if they are no longer dealing with the estate, he will then write to my sisters.

If my sisters continue to ignore his letters then he may have to take court action but that is only if all of the efforts to try to reason with my sisters fail.
As I said it's early days yet so it may not come to that.

Secondly, their distribution of the estate could be challenged in court.

No I don't want to contest the will. I am happy with what my mum has done and think it's perfectly fair that we each get the same.
A third each if the house gets sold.
All I want to do is get the house sold that's all so I can get my money. Nothing else.

Of course there is a third possibility - your sisters do it properly, having been warned off attempting misconduct by your solicitor's attention. I suspect this is what your solicitor expects to happen and is what they are charging you for.

Yes my solicitor warned me of the possibility.
In fact when I first came to him and told him he said he does not think my sisters will be putting themselves out to sell the house.
And warned me that they might try to delay things by not doing so.

But your solicitor will not know if your mother had any assets (eg a joint account with one of them, a valuable item or loose cash) your sisters might have kept for themselves and hidden from probate, unless you find and give them this information. Your solicitor will not know if your sisters have said or done something that shows they are unfit, unless you find and give them this information.

No I don't think my mum had a joint account with my sisters but even if she did that's none of my business.
And if my sister has she can keep that money.
I just want the house sold and my 25k my mum left me in her will, that's all.
If my sisters has got a secret account that's her business not mine I don't care.

This is the information for which we have asked about the evidence. If you have this evidence, use it now. You might not have to go to court - you or your solicitor could ask for running accounts of the estate to compare with what should be happening and that may be enough to keep your sisters in line. If you do not have evidence, collect it now before it is too late to find it - post 152 suggests how to approach this.

If my sisters is still living in my mothers house she is of course responsible for all of the bills since she is living there.
When my mother died my sisters should have told the utilities such as the gas and Electric and Water board of this and the bills or accounts would have been changed to my sisters name.
And my sister will have to pay all of the utilities for the time she is living their until she moves out.

No I might not have to go to court. As I said my solicitor will try to solve the problem without going to court first. Going to court will only be if everything else my solicitor has tried to reason with my sisters has failed. But he will try to reason with my sisters first.

If my sisters remain stubborn then he will eventually warn them that he will have to take court action and most people give in when faced with that.
But it has not got to that stage yet and might not.

My mother has already been buried and her funeral has already been paid for. Not by me but from my mothers money,she provided for that event. My sisters took care of the funeral.

missbiggles1

annbarbs wrote: »

Because after I told my sisters solicitor that I do not want my sister to live in the house and that it must be sold and also confirmed this in writing to them.
But my sisters phoned me and tried to talk me into changing my mind but I said NO Sister A cannot live in the house it must be sold.
And I did explain to my sisters why and I also told them in my emails to them.

The sister that is living in the house was nasty to me and said she is not leaving the house. But the other sisters did not seem to upset and just said she had hoped I would let my sisters stay but if not she will help my sister find somewhere else to live but she does not want to sell only because she has to.

At the moment my solicitor is corresponding with my sister by writing and talking to my sisters solicitor not writing to my sisters.
Since my sisters solicitors are acting on behalf of my sisters.
But if my sister are no longer using a solicitor and are now dealing with the estate themselves then my solicitor will write to my sisters.

My solicitor is still waiting for a response from my sisters solicitor to find this out but they have not answered his letter. So he is still awaiting a reply from my sisters solicitors.
So we still don't know if or not my sisters are still with their solicitor or are dealing with the estate without one.

Yes my solicitor will try to resolve the problem by writing to my sisters solicitors and if they are no longer dealing with the estate, he will then write to my sisters.

If my sisters continue to ignore his letters then he may have to take court action but that is only if all of the efforts to try to reason with my sisters fail.
As I said it's early days yet so it may not come to that.


No I don't want to contest the will. I am happy with what my mum has done and think it's perfectly fair that we each get the same.
A third each if the house gets sold.
All I want to do is get the house sold that's all so I can get my money. Nothing else.


Yes my solicitor warned me of the possibility.
In fact when I first came to him and told him he said he does not think my sisters will be putting themselves out to sell the house.
And warned me that they might try to delay things by not doing so.



No I don't think my mum had a joint account with my sisters but even if she did that's none of my business.
And if my sister has she can keep that money.
I just want the house sold and my 25k my mum left me in her will, that's all.
If my sisters has got a secret account that's her business not mine I don't care.




If my sisters is still living in my mothers house she is of course responsible for all of the bills since she is living there.
When my mother died my sisters should have told the utilities such as the gas and Electric and Water board of this and the bills or accounts would have been changed to my sisters name.
And my sister will have to pay all of the utilities for the time she is living their until she moves out.

No I might not have to go to court. As I said my solicitor will try to solve the problem without going to court first. Going to court will only be if everything else my solicitor has tried to reason with my sisters has failed. But he will try to reason with my sisters first.

If my sisters remain stubborn then he will eventually warn them that he will have to take court action and most people give in when faced with that.
But it has not got to that stage yet and might not.

My mother has already been buried and her funeral has already been paid for. Not by me but from my mothers money,she provided for that event. My sisters took care of the funeral.

Is it really too late for you to apologise and try to build bridges with your sisters? To throw your sister out of the home where she lives and where she cared for your mother is very hard, particularly when there's no benefit to you and you want to do it so quickly.

In this situation, it's unsurprising that your sisters are puzzled and angry by your attitude, particularly if there's "history" between you and the rest of the family. Sometimes a death can bring families closer together, it's a shame when money drives them further apart.

jouef

missbiggles1 wrote: »

To throw your sister out of the home where she lives and where she cared for your mother is very hard, particularly when there's no benefit to you.

There would be benefit of a clean financial break. Entering a business relationship (that of part-owner and renting tenant if the sister stays in the house) with a sibling after a rift is a recipe for disaster. Families in business are often bad for the family, the business or both.

annbarbs wrote: »

But my sisters phoned me and tried to talk me into changing my mind but I said NO Sister A cannot live in the house it must be sold. And I did explain to my sisters why and I also told them in my emails to them. The sister that is living in the house was nasty to me and said she is not leaving the house. But the other sisters did not seem to upset and just said she had hoped I would let my sisters stay but if not she will help my sister find somewhere else to live but she does not want to sell only because she has to.

Thanks Annbarbs, the picture is now clear. A clean financial break sounds better for you all. If you can repair the family rift in future all the better, but either way it is better for your finances to be completely independent of your sisters.

annbarbs wrote: »

So where do I go from here? And is my solicitor telling me correctly or can more be done about this?

We can now answer your original question. Your solicitor's advice is broadly in line with the circumstances. From what we know now, you are right to expect that your sisters will settle the estate in the sums you expect. There will be fees taken off your share - a third of the probate solicitor's, a third of any professional your sisters use for administration (they may decide to use a solicitor and an accountant), a third of the costs of preparing for sale and selling the house, and all of your solicitor's costs. You could ask the estate to pay the latter or retrieve them through a small claims court action, since they were occasioned by the personal representatives' behaviour. The sister in the house should pay rent to the estate.

You could still take the approach in post 152 to keep yourself better informed. Your solicitor will not have this 'on the ground' information. Others have advised ways to keep your legal costs down by giving your solicitor less work communicating with you, although if you know the cost of having extra contact, you of course have the right to pay it. In the unlikely event you have to go to court, the costs would soar - you have taken the correct steps to avoid this.

One more thing - make a detailed record of everything that has gone on, perhaps in an A4 diary where you can fill in what happened on the right day. Though also be sure to put the date that you wrote each item. The best way to do this, once you have caught up, is to record things as and when they occur. What letters and emails you had, phone calls, who said what. Keep copies of everything in a file.

This would be a difficult situation for any of us; I hope you can gather support around you to help you through it.

jouef

annbarbs wrote: »

If my sisters is still living in my mothers house she is of course responsible for all of the bills since she is living there.

One small point - when I suggested "you or your solicitor could ask for running accounts of the estate to compare with what should be happening" I meant accounts of the progress of administering the money and property on the estate, not the running costs of the house. So you would know what sums of money there were and where they are being held, what costs are being incurred and what actions are being taken. Beneficiaries do not have an automatic right to this information, but reps are free to provide it.

missbiggles1

jouef wrote: »

There would be benefit of a clean financial break. Entering a business relationship (that of part-owner and renting tenant if the sister stays in the house) with a sibling after a rift is a recipe for disaster. Families in business are often bad for the family, the business or both.
.

I doubt very much that most people would see this as a business relationship in any way, particularly as there's no point in charging the sister rent when the OP would simply lose this off her benefits anyway.

There's no benefit in a clean break per se for anybody except the non resident sister who has her own property and will benefit immediately after the sale. Both the OP and the resident sister will either be no better off or will be in a far worse situation.