urgent advice needed re divorce finances

HappyMJ

hemple wrote: »

oh and sorry the equity is about 40k in his and about 60-70k in mine

So...back of envelope calculation 40k plus 70k plus 68k then divide all by two is 89k each less the house you're keeping which is 70k means you need 19k more to both be equal. I'd ask him for that amount but I'd accept half....i.e 10k. 5k is far too low an offer. You go through 5k in no time. 10k should last a couple of years at least. 19k would be better but to fight for that might cost too much.

There'll be plenty more assets around so it's not a very accurate calculation. You need to add in the value of each of your pensions as well and split that. You may also have cars and household furnishings that you are keeping. It's a very big calculation absolutely everything goes into the pot and split in half and much better if you can do it yourself rather then getting solicitors doing it for you.

Mojisola

hemple wrote: »

no no children

He has a much better paid job than I do. Would he be liable to pay me any maintenance?

Why on earth would he have to pay you maintenance?

You both work, you both have your own houses and there are no children involved - once he leaves, you will be in the same position as you were before you married three years ago - two independent, single people.

hemple

I only asked about maintenance as the wikidivorce calculator thingy came up with a figure, but yes your right , why would I be entitled to any. Maybe need to stop trying to think about everything at a million miles an hour.

Tigsteroonie

You chased down the inheritance. He's now got that money, and has decided to leave. Hmmmmm. Personally I'd try to get out of this quickly before it drags out unnecessarily, and before this morally questionable person causes you any more emotional grief.

My recommendation is to cut a deal for £10k and all court costs associated with the divorce and the consent order.

But as others have said, definitely do not act in haste Wikivorce is a wonderful site.

HappyMJ

hemple wrote: »

I only asked about maintenance as the wikidivorce calculator thingy came up with a figure, but yes your right , why would I be entitled to any. Maybe need to stop trying to think about everything at a million miles an hour.

Spousal maintance is really only for very high net worth individuals where selling a business by the richer partner to pay the proceeds to the less well off partner may not be appropriate. Or...the value of the richer person is more in goodwill which doesn't have a physical cash value such as a footballer who will get residual income payments for the rest of their lives but may have very little actual net worth.

A clean break is much better. Go for that if you can.

justme111

I personally think it is wrong for you to try and get part of his inheritance. I would take his offer , get divorce with a clean break and not start what will be a prolonged court battle messing up with properties and inheritances. If your issue is that you feel not good now due to split embarking in a legal battle instead of closing this chapter of your life is going to make you feel worse, not better. I think it is regretful that so many people would consider trying to get as much as possible out of the situation moneywise. Short marriage , both have properties , no children - why on earth one would engage solicitors other than to formalise the agreement.

74jax

I don't think, for me, the inheritance should feature. Whether he knew the deceased or not.

How long have you been married?

I know you said he moved in 3 years ago, I would just seperate and you each take your properties.

Keep_pedalling

74jax wrote: »

I don't think, for me, the inheritance should feature. Whether he knew the deceased or not.

How long have you been married?

I know you said he moved in 3 years ago, I would just seperate and you each take your properties.

The OP would have benefited from this without the seperation, so yes she this should be included in the settlement.

The OP should also sort out a new will for herself without delay. If anything happens to her before a devorce is finalised he will get another undeserved inheritance from someone he does not care about.

74jax

Keep_pedalling wrote: »

The OP would have benefited from this without the seperation, so yes she this should be included in the settlement.

The OP should also sort out a new will for herself without delay. If anything happens to her before a devorce is finalised he will get another undeserved inheritance from someone he does not care about.

Yes, if they stay together they both benefit from each other's situation. But just because of this fact, to me, isn't a reason to take an inheritance. Just my opinion on it.

Whether an inheritance is 'deserved' or not is a strange thing to question.

But yes I agree, the moment a separation starts a new will should be made.

Jojo_fry

Yep, everything is 50-50 in a marriage - including any pension entitlements on either side, potentially.

Has the divorce petition been filed yet? Because the solicitor will usually arrange for the financial disclosure forms to be filled in and exchanged. This lists all of your bank accounts, savings, assets and also outlines what your income and capital needs are going to be, as well as giving a pen portrait of your lifestyle together, i.e. how many holidays you would go on a year, what kind of expensive items you might have bought for the house etc.

Only when all of this is down in black and white can you really get a sense of who is entitled to what, and negotiate on that basis.

Personally, I didn't do this when I got divorced, I came to an arrangement with my ex which we both felt was fair, and that was absolutely fine. However, it doesn't seem like things are going to be that easy or amicable in this situation and like everyone else here I would strongly advise against rushing to accept this offer.