A Diary of Reinventing Ourselves

mangle101

Keep your chin up FT, small steps, clenched teeth & lots of deep breaths ��

getmore4less

OH perhaps he is really just waiting for an inheritance to bail him out.

Who knows what he is really thinking,

Does he want to continue to bumble along or make a proper plan?

Get him to write down this magic plan for the credit cards not some I have an idea what is it how will it work what will it save etc.

If he can't document it, it's just another fantasy with no substance.

pelirocco

In 2014 you posted you were moving to a smaller house , what happened there?
( you also you had six kids ?)

Forward_thinking

Just been for a walk along the beach - that certainly blew a few cobwebs off. Oh then suggested we get an icecream. I dismissed that idea which wasn't very popular. Instead I have sent OH off to the shops to get some. Was surprised that he agreed. Was even more surprised when he walked out the door saying he was off to Lidls.

OH has agreed to look at some cars around his work place in London next week - says he will get more choice and it will take less time. So perhaps we will make slight progress afterall.

Pelirocco - yep, you're quite right. We were going to move but OH got a new contract and then decided he wanted to stay in this big place rather than live in a smaller one. I would much prefer to go smaller and throw more money at our debt. OH says it will cost us thousands to move and we don't have the deposit (suspect quite a lot will be taken off after multiple children in here). OH also says when they look at our accounts they will offer us very little for rent. Once before when we applied for a rental we got turned down and were told that they were only able to lend us £1200 a month. It wasn't because of our income but due to a complex picture with OH's company/dividends etc. Oh, and Pelirocco - six kids was to protect my identity. I've actually been a bit wary on this thread of saying how many children we have as larger families are more unusual these days and I am scared of being recognised. Hope you're not starting to think I am not being truthful - this diary has been a godsend for me and I really don't want to lose this place to vent Sorry, feeling a bit fragile this afternoon.

Forward_thinking

I am suddenly having a really horrible feeling in my stomach about keeping this diary. It has really fired me up but I suddenly feel like I was being naive that this forum is full of wonderful people wanting to help me. I've just realised that of course there are going to be people wanting to see me fail/look for flaws in my story. I can't lay myself completely bare on here - I am starting up with potential clients and my husband works with the general public every day. I don't have the time or strength to spend on a diary convincing people I am being honest. Perhaps I should just do this journey on my own. Sorry, super sensitive this afternoon but have hit a really low spot today.

When_the_going_gets_tough

Ft the Internet is a funny place both helpful and with pitfalls. Only you can decide what works for you and how much you want to say about your circumstances . You clearly need a place to speak frankly about your financial concerns though to someone if not here. I hope your dh increasingly is prepared to share this burden with you. Good luck whatever you decide.

Avalancher

FT, Unfortunately there will be some people that jump on things , but ignore them if you can. You are not obliged to answer to anyone here.. Tell them to mind their own business or just ignore them. But most people are cheering you from the sidelines and wanting you to succeed despite how hard your OH is making it for you.

I hope you do decide to continue as you are an inspiration and inspired me to do a diary to make sure that I stick to my promise to get out of debt.

lee111s

The positives of this place far outweight the negative!

Puzzcat

Hi Lurker here!
Ft, all we know about you is you rent a house, have 4 children, drive an older car and have an OH who has had his head buried in the sand when it comes to finances. I read many diaries and haven't identified anyone I know and even if I did I would certainly not 'out' them!
My diary is full of stuff that probably could identify me but I always check that I haven't included any give away names before posting.
Keep going you have loads of us cheering you on.
Love Puzz.x

Forward_thinking

Thank you. I am going to carry on and accept that some people won't be there to help me. There are too many people who have been incredible already at this very early stage. I would be cutting off my nose to spite my face. There will be the odd fact tweaked; please accept that. This is a diary for me. But your support is immeasurable. However, nearly everything will be fact, just the occasional tweak to keep me anonymous.

Right. Back on track. Oh has just come in really happy. He has six huge bags of shopping which he says will last the whole week apart from bread. He got the lot for £130 including nappies, wipes etc and says it would have cost at least £250 in Sainsburys. He said it was a miserable experience mind. I am sitting at the table doing homework and OH keeps running in showing me tins, potatoes etc and giving me a price comparison. I have a very sore lip - haven't said a word and kept telling him how clever he is. Men!!! A rare and enigmatic species.