Milann's life keeps getting in the way.......

beanielou

Great bargains and great news on the walk.

beanielou

It will take a while for you to get your confidence back.
Keep plodding.

milann

Thanks Beanie - deep down I know I've exceeded the doctors expectations in those early days but I'm so close to being back to 'normal' :rotfl::rotfl: whatever that might be. It's frustrating me like something not right......I've never been in this situation before - I've always steadily built up and got stronger after illnesses and surgery but I just can't push myself to the last hurdle and I'm not sure whether it's to do with nerve damage or in my head...Like you say I need to keep plodding....

I looked at finances yesterday and I owe £1700 - I must have lost the plot as I didn't make a payment last month - other than my minimum which goes out by dd every month. If I'm really careful I can just about pay it on payday - providing my full wage goes in the bank. It will leave me penniless for the rest of the month and I'll have to live from the freezer/cupboards - but I have plenty in - just need milk and fresh food. I'm really torn as to what to do - do I want the pressure of no cash for the sake of another month.....but I could carry on like this forever. Will ponder some more.....

It's my ds birthday at the end of the month too.....decisions decisions!!

I'm very tempted to go into town but the MSE part of me says stay away as I'll end up spending the other part of me needs to get out and do something instead of sitting thinking.....

Dh bought me a new Fitbit for my birthday at the end of September then I ended up in hospital the 1st week in October but the ap has all my old steps and awards from my old fit bit on it - I think it'll be a while until I reach 30000 steps and we have really struggled finding out how to reset it to zero and wipe my history to start again as I am now. Anyway after getting in touch with their customer services they'll reset it - I'll be able to restart it from zero from Thursday. So I'm going back to slimming world on Thursday too - I'm going to rejoin and ask her to delete all my past history of yo-yoing - a complete new start....

I struggled to find positives yesterday as I feeling bleughhhhh - post Christmas blues me thinks.
Today I am grateful
- to be in the position to even contemplate paying off all debt or leave it another month.
- to have come so far in my recovery
- to have a job where I get my wage whilst on the sick

beanielou

Leave it another month.
Just my thought.

milann

I'm leaning towards that I think Beanie - but then I change my mind!!!

Sun_Addict

I'm another suffered the post Christmas blues but I think I'm through the other side now. Could you split the 1700 into two payments or would it incur a lot of interest?

milann

I could SA - there'd be interest but I wouldn't mind too much as it'd only be 1 month.
Half of me just wants to wipe the slate clean with everything in January and start February afresh
- back in work - hopefully
- debt free
- driving again
- building my walking with my re set fit bit
- re instate my gym membership
- losing weight with SW

The other half wonders if it's worth the struggle

Mind games I know but it keeps me going - feel as if I'm wishing my life away.

A friend should have been coming around today but had to cancel as she's not well. Might go for a walk - will take a crutch till I get a few more walks under my belt with dh

beanielou

£1000 this month & the rest next?

beanielou

Meant to ask you do you get your hospital appointment sorted out?
Hops so

milann

Providing I get my full wage next week and I don't really see why not - I'm going to pay £1300 - I've still got some cash I didn't get round to paying before Christmas - senior moment :rotfl::rotfl: that'll leave me nearly £500 plus whatever I spend this month to pay in February. When I checked again it was actually nearer £1800. When I looked into it closely I couldn't pay it 1 go without going into overdraft which I don't want to do.

Well yesterday I went to SW I spent best part of £60 on 12 week countdown, journal and magazine. This is it - if I don't lose and get to or close to target I'm calling it a day. I set a weight target and later worked out how many pounds I'd like to lose - 24 1/2 which by sheer chance is a midges over 2 lb a week. I don't know if I can do this as I'm not noted for being consistent with weight loss. But I need to change my outlook - cos if I alway do what I always did I'll always get what I always got.....determined

I've started taking a benecol drink to bring my cholesterol down - does anyone know if they work.

I had a call from consultants secretary yesterday and I go tomorrow. I hope I can get the go ahead to drive but I'm a bit nervous as I really don't like driving and my confidence has gone a bit. I'll get back into it once I'm behind the wheel.

I called in work yesterday with my sick note and it was lovely to see everyone - spurred me on to get walking and back. I actually walked into town afterwards and intended getting the bus from town home but I walked - using a crutch but it's quite a distance - a couple of miles - so I was well chuffed. I'm aching today though.

Today I'm grateful for
- hospital appointment tomorrow
- getting walking again
- getting back into positive mindset