it's a bit depressing being single this time of year, do you agree?

catoutthebag

https://youtu.be/U7xrQY_FLM4

scottish_lassy

I was thinking about this topic only yesterday (I have been single for a while) and I had to remind myself that some of my lonliest, unhappiest festive seasons were when I was in a relationship. No-one on outside sees the pain of dealing with a drinker/alcoholic over the holidays and the stress involved. In fact, I don't think I would be having my DGS to stay if I was still with my last partner because of his drinking and I wouldn't swop DGS cuddles for anything. I always think when I see supposedly happy couples that all may not be as it seems.

It's lovely for those who have genuine trust and companionship and I do envy them but have to accept that maybe it's not for me. Better being alone than lonely.

catoutthebag

Happy new year

https://youtu.be/ngZh6ZSRoYg

Fmess

fitnessguy - I kind of know what you mean. This was my first single Christmas for 8 years, after ending my relationship earlier this year. I wouldn't say it's depressing but definitely stirs some sad emotions in me. Especially with all the couples getting engaged and showing their happy pics on fb. I hope you had a good festive period despite this

sofarbehind

I've been single for the last five years and can't see that changing in the future. As I've got older and friends become busy with young babies it's getting harder and harder over the festive period. Particularly without a supportive family of my own.


I would like next year to be different.

piglet74

This is my first Christmas \ New year single, in 20 years.

While I felt emotional at times, there had also been times when I was married and felt even more lonely, than I did this year. I can suit myself, cook what I like, watch tv when I like, no more husband constantly channel surfing, I am really starting to enjoy the single life,

I am looking forward to what 2016 might bring me, i am single and have been for nine months now, but I wouldn't say no to a date if asked, I plan on getting away on a holiday, either alone or with family,

The world is my oyster!

fitnessguy1

i think another problem for me is i don't have a big social circle. the majority of my friends are in relationships and are married or engaged with children, so they don't do things a single person would do. i have kind of distanced myself a little from them and don't talk to them much at all, and even when we do meet up i feel like an outsider because they all seem to be settling down/settled down and have things in common.

it is hard to meet new people/friends because most people meet their long term friends during school/college years. i did try online dating just to meet people but everyone just assumes you're there to date so it never leads anywhere. as for online dating for actually dating, well that just isn't successful because having a lack of social life means i have no good photos apart from selfies lol and then i just find the whole concept of online dating strange because you're just having a conversation with a stranger over the net. i am a sociable person and like to speak to people in real life and face to face, always have been like that.

i think my social circle situation is an issue with meeting women. i also spent a lot of time with my ex girlfriend and never really socialised with people apart from her. she had her friends but she still managed time to see them whereas for me i think because my social circle was never strong in the first place it was that much more difficult for me. i am almost 30 and as we get older it tends to get harder to meet people. i remember before i was in a relationship i had a healthy social life and the opportunity was there to meet women/new people, but now my social life is not as good, i don't get the chance any more.

fitnessguy1

which is the most effective way to meet new friends? most relationships, both romantic and non-romantic require mutual trust so takes a long time to build up. it is even tougher when it seems impossible to meet people though.

Prothet_of_Doom

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

kingfisherblue

I know what you mean about social circles fitnessguy - my friends are mainly in relationships or are people I know through Guiding. There aren't many opportunities to meet men, especially at my age (mid-forties) and with children.

You, however, don't have the ties that I have, and you are younger. The usual advice is to join a group or take a class in something that interests you. Hopefully you will meet someone with similar interests and you can take it from there.

FWIW, I met my ex through my auntie - she wasn't matchmaking. I was staying the weekend with her and she had a darts match. One of her opponents asked me out and we were together for nineteen years. So you can meet people just by chance, in the most unlikely way.

I hope that you find happiness with someone.