Another what would you do...

bylromarha

ecgirl07 wrote: »

Sorry misread phone numbers as phone. Did he get £2 back from the school when the £9 was taken in or did the school just take £7? Asking for a sub of train fair could have been a good way to make friends?

Nope - no £2 sent back through the school system when we paid £9 for the trip. And I'm not sure the best way to meet someone for the first time is to ask them for money!

Newly_retired

Whilst I agree there was some responsibility on the school's part not to just let a pupil walk away from a booked trip, even a local one, there are other lessons to be learned which you can do something about, beyond just complaining to to the school.
If you felt the letter was ambiguous, why did you not contact the school to check it out beforehand?
Why throw away an important communication which involves your son? Keep all school letters until after the event.
Discuss with your son what that £5 emergency money might be for.
Discuss various scenarios before any trip or arrangements which deviate from the norm.
Maybe it is time to get him a basic mobile?
Don't wait for a full blown situation that you say he cannot process, talk through situations where normally you would take control, and see what he makes of them, help him develop his decision making skills.
Don't blame the school for everything. They have many more pupils to cater for than you have children to bring up. It is your task to enable your son to learn to cope with whatever life brings.
Sorry if this sounds harsh.
Here speaks a retired teacher, cynical about parents who don't play their part in educating their children.

bylromarha

thorsoak wrote: »

Always keep the original message - I know, you receive dozens of them for each child, each term - but file them and keep them to refer back if there are any problems such as you have encountered. That way you have a rock from which to argue - and if the school is at fault, then they can rectify it for the next time.

Shall probably have to photocopy them then so I get the reply slip in there too!

LilElvis

Re the line in the letter about no change being given. This will have meant that if you put a £10 or £20 note in the envelope they were not going to give back the excess amount paid. Our (primary)school states the same in all letters, as does the PTA, because it is an administrative nightmare otherwise in sorting out the change, placing in an envelope and then ensuring it reaches the correct child.

bylromarha

Newly_retired wrote: »

Whilst I agree there was some responsibility on the school's part not to just let a pupil walk away from a booked trip, even a local one, there are other lessons to be learned which you can do something about, beyond just complaining to to the school.
If you felt the letter was ambiguous, why did you not contact the school to check it out beforehand? - as a large secondary have far better things to do than chase clerical errors, plus I put a handwritten note on the reply slip saying we'd included £9 as we weren't sure if it was £7 or £9 they were asking for, so had in fact contacted them. Thanks for reminding me.
Why throw away an important communication which involves your son? Keep all school letters until after the event. - I'd decanted all the important information from it onto my calender, I ddn't think I'd need to keep a letter to wave back at the school as it was going to go wrong as I've never had to before. I've never know a school trip to go wrong like this. Never.
Discuss with your son what that £5 emergency money might be for. - we had. We didn't include not being able to get on a train on a school trip of which you've already paid the fare. Especially as he gets the bus. We also haven't told him to spend that money on buying an alien an ice cream as that scenario is just as unlikely as the one he found himself in.
Discuss various scenarios before any trip or arrangements which deviate from the norm - we did - we didn't expect the teacher to let him walk away from the train station after being checked into the trip.
Maybe it is time to get him a basic mobile? - he has one. As stated before, he isn't allowed it in school or to and from school. We believe it's important to show him we follow the rules.
Don't wait for a full blown situation that you say he cannot process, talk through situations where normally you would take control, and see what he makes of them, help him develop his decision making skills. - already done - but you can't discuss scenarios which you cannot perceive are going to happen, even as an adult.
Don't blame the school for everything. They have many more pupils to cater for than you have children to bring up. It is your task to enable your son to learn to cope with whatever life brings. - and we expect the school to care for them, not allow them to walk away when they have responsibility for them on a trip.
Sorry if this sounds harsh. - no, it sounds as if you haven't fully read the thread.
Here speaks a retired teacher, cynical about parents who don't play their part in educating their children.

I am also a teacher - just in primary, so I see things from the 11 year old persepctive of had he been born 2 weeks earlier he's still be in year 6. And his emotional age is that of a year 4 on some things.

If you have any tips on teaching a child to grow up quicker than their maturity levels, I'd be grateful.

bylromarha

LilElvis wrote: »

Re the line in the letter about no change being given. This will have meant that if you put a £10 or £20 note in the envelope they were not going to give back the excess amount paid. Our (primary)school states the same in all letters, as does the PTA, because it is an administrative nightmare otherwise in sorting out the change, placing in an envelope and then ensuring it reaches the correct child.

Really?! I've never seen that before. I've taught in 3 schools too and my kids went to 2 other primary schools. We've always had change sorted out - even in the 3 form entry my daughter goes to. Well, who'd have thunk it. That's useful. Thank you.

On this letter though, the change comment came after the train fare is £1.50 - £2 part so I remember talking with hubby about why they put those 2 lines together and what was going to happen to the excess 50p's or if they were just going to buy returns for all the kids without having to bother to see who was being collected from the theatre.

Kaye1

I agree with keeping the letters in future.
We paid in advance for an external provider who offered 8 dance lessons at my child's school. She did 6 and then came out and said they had done a mini performance as it was the last lesson.
I was able to go back, get the letter and get all the parents a refund from the provider. The school hadn't noticed it as it was all handled by the external company.


I would be annoyed that they just let him walk away too.

pollypenny

Oh, God!

I would be very unhappy with this as a parent and a teacher. if someone in my department planned a trip and its cost in such a manner I would be angry.

We have a duty of care to our pupils, that means that any plans for visits should be clear, both to the kids and for parents.

y7 pupils are frequently a bit timid about standing out and disorganised. Why the hell the teacher couldn't have lent him £2 I don't know. And sending him off is simply wrong.

bylromarha

pollypenny wrote: »

Oh, God!

I would be very unhappy with this as a parent and a teacher. if someone in my department planned a trip and its cost in such a manner I would be angry.

We have a duty of care to our pupils, that means that any plans for visits should be clear, both to the kids and for parents.

y7 pupils are frequently a bit timid about standing out and disorganised. Why the hell the teacher couldn't have lent him £2 I don't know. And sending him off is simply wrong.

I don't know that she sent him off - it could be that he said I can't go on the trip any more, I have to go home or something like that.

VfM4meplse

ecgirl07 wrote: »

Your son needs some lifeskills. Set him up with situations where he has to solve real world problems so he creates street smarts.

He had all the tools he needed to solve the problem ie £5 and a mobile phone what was he thinking that he didnt use the £5 or sub from a mate or phone you?

Huh? He is just 11!

I was reminded how much "younger" year 7 boys are than girls when I was driving past a school at 3.30pm yesterday. They are just tiddlers!

But I do agree that kids need to be challenged to develop problem-solving skills.