Is there anywhere I can make a plea for help

dancingfairy

I wish there was something I could do to help . I'm sending you virtual hugs. Keep going. I hope you get support soon.
Df

patman99

I am not in a position to do anything other than to offer a virtual hug.

Have you thought about using a crowdfunding site like gofundme or similar to raise enough money for a deposit and 3 months rent on a private house (or even to cover storage fees)?. I know some of them have a minimum period of 30 days for a campaign, but if you set your campaign to raise £5,000 and share it via FB, you might stand a good chance of raising enough money to no longer have to worry.

Before anyone asks 'why only £5,000' it is because it would keep the op's total savings below the £6,000 at which she would start losing benefits.

DeannaTrois if you do go down the route of using a crowdfunding campaign to help you, can you either post the link on here, or PM me as I would be more than happy to not only chip in £10 but share it out via my FB page.

Sunshinemummy

deannatrois wrote: »

My older son has an autism specialist social worker, she referred us to every social worker group she could think of. Because my younger son was then having problems at school and in fact refusing school (all sorted now, the school has a new headmistress and she has introduced lots of supportive measures for kids with special needs). A social worker from Early Learning came round. Instead of talking about what she could do to help younger son at school, she asked what 'other' problems related to school, I said well we are going to be made homeless soon. I've tried to keep things from him but as the LL's come round and ring up, he does have an idea what is going on and is fairly stressed about it.

She then went on and on about me needing to accept that I should find private rental otherwise the council will put me in private rental anywhere in the country. But it was obvious she also didn't know what she was talking about. Because of the services my children are receiving here, and the waiting lists to access these same services in other parts of the country, I do have a way of fighting that. I can't afford to rent privately anymore, rents are way above LHA levels (and LL's who accept benefit tenants with no guarantor are an extinct species here, I've looked for three years). Discretionary Housing payments are for six months only so it would mean expense of moving, just to delay this homelessness as I have no doubt I would be doing little more than putting off homelessness for a while. Hope that makes sense, this is the short version lol.

But she just wouldn't listen and I just went downwards (depression) as she went on. Not a clever response but I couldn't stop it. I said well, if we are going to be moving to another part of the country soon, no point in you being here because no point in you doing anything about my son's schooling here.

Please leave.

Just couldn't cope with her.

So that's the only 'child' related social worker I've been referred to. As I'm not abusing them, from what my older son's social worker said, no one else social worker ish would be interested.

I have been told, once the Royal Maudsley finish their tests, they will be recommending a package of care. But that will take three months at least. I hope their recommendations will be acted upon..,but well, you know how it is, they may not be.

I did try to get traditional social worker help because of the upcoming homelessness but they weren't interested (child social work). I was given a carers assessment during which I explained the stress going on, my depression, suicide, etc but she just kept saying nothing she could do. The Royal Maudsley say they need to recommend a 'proper' care assessment, but not sure how that differs. The carers assessment was done by a charity (they are employed by Gravesham to do this service). Hoping it won't be like that. It was pretty useless.

Apologies if that's TMI. I really haven't just sat on my behind waiting for things to happen. Just that there is very little help. or maybe I'm doing it all wrong. I don't know. My tolerance is quite low now, I just hit the depths because of worry about what is going to happen.

but You are all helping. Its the lack of hope that gets to you. You are allowing me to vent and also making suggestions, that helps so much. I wish I could get this 'package of care' now.., I don't know how I will cope with Bailiffs turning up and then dealing with the Council 'gatekeeping' again. My older son is affected by ASD and anxiety quite badly. I'm trying to get his father to take him for a few days so he doesn't see me go into one if I do. I will try very hard not to, but its hard to control when things are impossible. I don't see opportunities to negotiate, I just take what people say literally, most of the time, and so far, even when I pointed out Housing Policy (as it was written) to the Housing Officer, he was having none of it so I don't know what to do if same happens again.

Children's services do have responsibility to manage the public purse, but they also have a responsibility to support children in need.

Ultimately if you want to be in local authority housing, it maybe best to go through with the eviction (protecting the children as much as possible). Housing then will provide emergency accommodation for 28 days whilst assessment is undertake whether you are intentionally homeless. If you are deemed intentionally homeless, they have no duty to house you - but children's services may kick in at this point. I cannot see any authority kicking you out of the emergency accommodation.... so you may obtain local authority housing by the back door.

Good luck

[Deleted User]

Thank you Patman99 for the crowdfunding idea. I'm afraid I've had a lot of judgements made about me.., and it stays with you. I just couldn't put something like this on the site.., because not everyone is as generous as people on here have been. I've been very lucky with the support people have offered, and so grateful for putting up with my whining (lol, it is really, I know that). I've been tempted to put up a facebook page so people in a similar situation can understand the process and what happens but pretty sure it would be flamed so I haven't.

OK to update. Sanctuary came round, saw the evidence of special needs for children including diagnosis reports, GP letter, social work letters, evidence of appointments, report from diabetologist, list of medication. lol poor Sanctuary advisers, I opened the door to them, no 'hello, nice to see you', just 'bloody housing officer says my son's diagnosis documents are too old' lol. I'm such a social success ha ha.

Housing officer had JUST sent me an email saying the diagnosis documents I have might not be accepted as too old (2006). Like ASD just goes away lol. But Sanctuary said I hopefully had enough current letters from GP/Social worker to confirm the diagnosis and its effects. But that bit of info is annoying.., how many people go for more recent diagnosis of life long conditions (and wait two or three years for it to happen). Just 'luck' that we've had a year of hell with being told the LL wants to sell, I managed to get my older son a social worker a few months ago and he's got worse so he's been referred elsewhere. Waited a year for the Maudsley reassessment appointment. If I hadn't done that a year ago.., we could be found to not need social housing.., how many people get caught out by that?

I explained the situation to the Royal Maudsely (that my older son's diagnosis documents might be deemed too old) and could they please send a letter or a report urgently to confirm what they have found so far. They seemed very understanding. Hope they can help in time, just in case the case is reviewed by a medical officer having a bad day.

Anyway the medical assessment officer will only accept documents from professionals so my five page letter detailing why we need other than single room emergency accommodation was a complete waste of time.

I'm just hoping there isn't something I could have done if I had known that not having will lose us a chance to get social housing.

Sanctuary did confirm that with a C priority (which we will get if we are ever deemed homeless) we will be waiting a very very long time for social housing. But they also said that rebanding does happen based on medical need. How they couldn't say as they can't help with that. Arrrgh.

Its all a bit hit and miss really. So everything crossed.

Hoping that someone with a similar housing problem comes across this and reads enough to avoid the pitfalls. So easy to do the wrong thing. How I could have two kids with obvious ASD and be found to not have a vulnerable family because diagnosis is too old (given how difficult it was to get referred for reassessment a year ago).., well, words fail me.

Aww just seen an additional letter the social worker has done, she's managed to say what I said in my letter (the long one) but in such a way, the medical officer HAS to see it.., and said she's done letters etc that would normally increase a family's priority to A or B banding but with no response.

Can't say how grateful I am. I guess if you have the right people on side, they will find a legitimate way to get evidence that should be seen, seen. I think that letter will change things. Thank god.

ancientofdays

I don't think you are whining, fingers crossed that the letter is effective

altojack

Deanna, I have to help to offer you but fingers crossed that this letter will make all the difference.

preciousillusions

Best of luck to you. xx

patman99

Fingers crossed for you and your family. I know for a fact that Sanctuary have a great deal of expertease in the mental health sector and even have their own social housing schemes with on-site support teams (although this does appear to be aimed at single people).

They helped my son with supported living until they considered him ready to move on. At that point, they used one of their 2 upgrades to lift him to band a on the housing register. Now, he lives in a nice flat in a nice area.

Hopefully the same will happen to you.

[Deleted User]

Sent all the evidence I possibly could to Housing, they've sent it off to be assessed to decide what sort of emergency accommodation we qualify for. Couldn't supply anymore and I'm pretty sure its more than most are able to supply. So here's hoping. Should hear in a few days.

I didn't receive a bailiffs letter. Feel like the LL is indulging in mental torture while sort of appearing amiable. PO is up today.., he says he is going back to court tomorrow.

Thank goodness, most of excess furniture etc is in storage. Didn't cost me a thing. Two trips with a trailer. Only problem is, my younger son is pretty stressed and had a major melt down this morning. Did eventually get him to school. School are doing what they can to help.

So now I do the hole filling and cleaning routine to get the house ready for leaving. Will be taking lots of photos.

I have halogen lights in the main bedroom. No lights now.., ex went into the attic where the wires are and said there are bare wires twined together, they have melted the insulation. I have informed the LL.., no reply at all. Can't wait to get out, well I wouldn't if I knew what we were going to.., but well I guess there will be no risk of fire.

Social workers says my older son will get two 6 hour sessions of help from a PA a week, they will help him with travelling, life skills etc. That's one of the reasons I can't leave the borough.., its taken a year to get this far.

Told the postman I'd be leaving and he was quite sad (I often take in post for others and we talk), he said I was 'part of the street'. I didn't comment on any possible double entendres lolol.

duchy

Every day is a step nearer to this all getting resolved
Hang on in there - and if you need a hand physically moving stuff ASK -I only have a little car but may be able to help.