Funeral plans?

true81

Hello

My granddad died a couple of months ago and the cost of his funeral was quite high but he and my grandma had prepared for this expense. He had beautiful cars flowers and an engraved casket.

Recently I have been talking to my mum about funerals and I wouldn't even know where to start. She has no provisions for a funeral and I'm currently a stay at home mum with my partner being in full time work.

I'm the eldest of 5 children, 3 of my sibling are unemployed and have zero savings or anything.
My mum says all the right things like she wants to save but she just isn't doing anything about it:mad::mad: When it comes down to it - it will all be left down to me which sounds very selfish but I have my own children and own funeral to think about my children are the older grandchildren the eldest being my daughter at 15 and my children have savings and I DO NOT want them to have to fund her funeral.
I really don't mean to be selfish or sound horrible but I just don't want that burden when she is quite capable of putting something aside for herself.
Argh what can i do?

Savvy_Sue

You don't have to do anything. It's not you who pays for your mother's funeral, it's her estate - what she leaves behind.

Has your mother made a will? Is she married to your father? Does she have anything to leave?

If she's in a rented property and has nothing in her bank accounts, then do not arrange the funeral. this link http://www.oldham.gov.uk/info/200437/public_health_funerals (sorry my links are misbehaving atm) tells you what happens in one local authority, others will have very similar arrangements.


You could ask your mum if she's happy with that, but I can think of better reasons to save than for your funeral.

true81

That's the thing

She has nothing no house no savings nothing.....nothing no job, zero.
No will my dad isn't around and she lives in a house owned by the council, thanks for the link I will have a look at it now.

She is such a popular woman and her funeral turn out would be huge but they would get a shock,

Mojisola

True81 wrote: »

Recently I have been talking to my mum about funerals and I wouldn't even know where to start. She has no provisions for a funeral and I'm currently a stay at home mum with my partner being in full time work.

I'm the eldest of 5 children, 3 of my sibling are unemployed and have zero savings or anything.

I really don't mean to be selfish or sound horrible but I just don't want that burden when she is quite capable of putting something aside for herself.

Will you be able to withstand the emotional pressure from family members and her friends who might expect you to pay for the funeral? If so, leave it to the council or the hospital (depending on where she dies).

Tell her now that if she doesn't put money aside to cover the expense, this is what will happen. It's up to her then what happens.

G6JNS

True81 wrote: »

Hello

My granddad died a couple of months ago and the cost of his funeral was quite high but he and my grandma had prepared for this expense. He had beautiful cars flowers and an engraved casket.

Recently I have been talking to my mum about funerals and I wouldn't even know where to start. She has no provisions for a funeral and I'm currently a stay at home mum with my partner being in full time work.

I'm the eldest of 5 children, 3 of my sibling are unemployed and have zero savings or anything.
My mum says all the right things like she wants to save but she just isn't doing anything about it:mad::mad: When it comes down to it - it will all be left down to me which sounds very selfish but I have my own children and own funeral to think about my children are the older grandchildren the eldest being my daughter at 15 and my children have savings and I DO NOT want them to have to fund her funeral.
I really don't mean to be selfish or sound horrible but I just don't want that burden when she is quite capable of putting something aside for herself.
Argh what can i do?

Nobody has to fund it if there is no money in the estate. It then becomes the responsibility of the local authority or the hospital if the person died there. The funeral will be simple but dignified and usually cremation as it costs less. People often come under pressure from the family but there is no legal obligation whatsoever.

bongonaut

It's every bit as important for us to consider the impact of our parents funerals as it is our own; quite simply because we are the ones that are left to arrange our parents funerals.

All the previously posted replies are correct. It's worth bearing in mind that some help is available from the Social Fund IF the person arranging the funeral (NOT the deceased) is in receipt of certain benefits. Details are available at https://www.gov.uk/funeral-payments.

Mojisola

bongonaut wrote: »

It's worth bearing in mind that some help is available from the Social Fund IF the person arranging the funeral (NOT the deceased) is in receipt of certain benefits.

And as long as there isn't another close relative who isn't on the relevant benefits.

G6JNS

Mojisola wrote: »

And as long as there isn't another close relative who isn't on the relevant benefits.

Exactly how does that work given that no individual has any legal obligation to arrange or contribute to the costs?

Mojisola

G6JNS wrote: »

Exactly how does that work given that no individual has any legal obligation to arrange or contribute to the costs?

The DWP won't hand over money if there is a close relative able to pay for the funeral.

Whether they choose to do so is another issue.

G6JNS

Mojisola wrote: »

The DWP won't hand over money if there is a close relative able to pay for the funeral.

Whether they choose to do so is another issue.

And exactly how do the DWP know? Given that organizing a funeral needs considerable speed I don't see how they can do this. Can you cite the rules? In any case since the local authority or the hospital have the legal obligation to provide the funeral it all seems rather academic.

Mojisola

G6JNS wrote: »

And exactly how do the DWP know? Given that organizing a funeral needs considerable speed I don't see how they can do this. Can you cite the rules? In any case since the local authority or the hospital have the legal obligation to provide the funeral it all seems rather academic.

https://www.gov.uk/funeral-payments/eligibility

The person claiming could lie (and commit fraud), I suppose, if they could live with the risk of being found out.

If you need to claim help from the DWP, the funeral can't be done in a hurry - you have to wait for the claim to be processed.